Broken Rabbit
by GillyRabbit
Summary: AU :: Gilbert gets fired from his job and spends the night drinking in a sad attempt to lift his spirit, but his night quickly goes south with a scarring event that leaves him broken and nearly dead. When a mysterious and seemingly eccentric man saves him and nurses him back to health, the two form an unbreakable bond that neither of them truly understand.
1. Fired

Okay so this is the first chapter of a new fanfic I'm writing, it's an AU fanfic~ I personally like what I have so far, I just hope others like it and I continue writing it, because I'm having fun with it :)

I'm trying to explore a different, darker side of my writing ability with this fanfic, so this _should_ feel different than my other fanfics on my account.

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**Author's Notes: **

-Although he hasn't appeared yet, Ivan is 23 in this story, which does in fact make him _older_ than Gilbert. Don't rack on me about it, I know that Prussia is technically older than Russia, but it's my story, and it's an AU story. Leave me alone. *Looks away awkwardly*

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**WARNINGS:** Sensitive concepts/topics, swearing, use of alcohol, weird stuff, etc...

Edited: November 9th, 2012

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**~January 11th, 2013~**

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**

"You are fired."

.

The words came out colder than the January air outside and hit him harder than a brick.

"Fired? You've _got_ to be kidding me..." he mumbled confusedly, beginning to lose his patience and rubbing his palm on his forehead and pushing back some locks of his snowy hair.

His boss, an elderly man with a thick Russian accent, shook his head and closed his eyes. "I am not, Gilbert. I have to let you go."

.

A wave of heat took over his body and he slammed his fists down on the desk his boss was sitting at.

"You _can't_ fire me! I need this job more than anyone here!" he yelled.

"Gilbert-"

"No! I moved here from Berlin _just_ for this dead-end job because you promised me good money! I work extra hours to make ends meet and just to keep myself fed!" he paused for a second, scowling at the man. "Do you _know_ what will happen to me if I lose this job!?" he panted hard, his fists coiling into balls.

"I am sorry, but you are causing too many problems for the company. Now please, pack your things and leave before I have you escorted out."

Gilbert growled, showing his teeth in pure rage. He wanted to hurt something, preferably the man in front of him, but that would just land himself in jail, or worse.

.

He grabbed his trench coat from his small locker and wrapped it around himself, his fingers fumbling with the buttons. He couldn't concentrate at all, he was too mad, but after some time, more rational thoughts began to flood his brain.

_I'll lose my apartment... I'll end up on the streets... I don't have enough money for a plane back to West's house... dammit, what am I going to do..._

.

.

He pulled on the ends of his scarf, tightening the loop which created a sort of mask around his face before he pushed the door of his former workplace open. Honestly, he really just wanted to kick the damn thing down, but of course, that would be vandalism and would land him in jail as well.

The air still bit at his face and he tried to squeeze his eyes shut tight in a vain attempt to shield them from the cold winter air. Over the last two years he discovered various things about himself; he could manage to live by himself, he looks good in a scarf, and he actually likes the taste of vodka. But he also discovered one thing that he absolutely hated.

Cold.

Cold anything; cold water, cold air, cold food, cold drinks -except for beer or vodka-, cold blankets... why _was_ his blanket always cold? Doesn't that defeat the point of a blanket?

.

He growled, feeling the inside of his worn-out boots beginning to become soaking wet from the snow. His feet started to sting a little from the cold.

Again with the cold...

.

.

He didn't bother to take his coat off; even the inside of his apartment was freezing. He walked to his room, ignoring the light switch and threw his bag on the floor. Flopping down on his bed in the cold darkness, he took his cell phone out of his pocket and picked a contact from his list.

.

It rang 3 separate times before anyone answered.

"Hallo?" the familiar German accent came through the phone.

"I hate my life, West." He said it as if it was a normal statment.

"Uh..." there was a pause, "Gil? What's wrong now?"

"I got fired." He said simply, rubbing a lock of his white hair between his fingers and looking at it ever-so boringly.

"What!?" the man yelled, nearly jumping up from his desk.

"Yeeep."

"... o-okay... are you coming home then?" Ludwig asked.

"Nope. Not enough money."

"Okay... can you find a new job?"

"Probably not. I've been trying for months to get a second job, but no one wants to hire some albino freak." He said, suddenly remembering all those embarrassing times he was chased out of various stores and company buildings.

Ludwig sighed, which sounded like a bunch of air rushing through the phone, "I'm sure you can find something..."

"I have no motivation for something like that right now." He grumbled.

"Gilbert..." Ludwig groaned. Really, his brother could be such a little child sometimes.

"Don't say my full name like it's gonna magically change everything, West. I'm screwed and you know it."

"Fine, spend the rest of the night sulking. But please, call me tomorrow morning to let me know you're alright, okay?" his voice was laced with worry. Gilbert tended to make brash decisions when faced with unfortunate situations.

"Yeah yeah~ don't worry about me, I'm not gonna get myself killed, I promise~"

"Good." There was another voice coming through the phone from the background, sounded like 'pasta' or something. Ludwig sighed heavily into the phone, "Well I have to go, Feliciano is bugging me again."

Gilbert chuckled, "I think you enjoy his 'bugging'~" he teased.

"Excuse me?"

"Kese~ nothing West, bye!" He pressed _end_ on his cell phone and threw it on his bed, instantly coming down from any happiness that talking to his brother gave him.

Suddenly the silence felt like it was drowning him. He hated silence, he had to have some sort of noise or else he couldn't be comfortable.

.

He looked at the clock on his phone, it read 5:36pm, and then he sat up.

"I have enough money to buy a drink or two, I think."

.

.

The evening streets of Moscow were always lively, even in the dead of winter. People were mostly happy; smiling and holding hands with their lovers, children were typically running around playing with each other or screaming, and teenagers were standing around texting on their phones.

However, it was a little different for him. He didn't have a lover to hold hands with, primarily because he didn't care or trust the people around him, especially women. He was not a child that was carefree enough to play, although sometimes he did feel like screaming, and he had no one to text; he was too busy trying to work and keep himself alive. He could barely feed himself and he was beginning to loose a lot of weight because of it, and what he hated the most was that he has become a lot weaker in the last two years.

.

He stopped in the middle of the sidewalk and looked up at the grey sky. Some passersby turned their heads as they walked passed him. It was nothing new though, he was used to being stared at; his white hair, red eyes and pale skin seemed to be a main attraction for some people when he was out on the streets. If he really wanted, he could have many jobs. However, he doesn't consider strangers toying with and violating his body a job.

.

_I can't believe I've been here for two years already..._ he thought to himself, narrowing his eyes a little. _I thought by now I would have enough money to help West remodel his house, and pay off my debts... instead, I've just gotten myself in more shit than before... _

Someone bumped into him as they passed, "Hey! Watch where you're going punk!" the man yelled.

He could have sworn he could hear his patience snap, "Ex_cuse_ me!? _You _bumped into _me_, jackass!"

As fast as the words exited his mouth, the man's fist connected with his cheek, sending him back a few feet. "Watch your mouth or else you'll end up dead, brat!" the man yelled again and turned on his heels to walk away.

Gilbert coughed as he held his cheek, and he poked his tongue at the inside of his mouth and felt a raw gash along the inside, tasting some blood inside his mouth. _Dammit... I've gotten too weak._

* * *

This is just the beginning, it gets better I promise! ... well, at least, I think it gets better ;_;

I am looking for feedback! I wanna know what you guys think ^^'~

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**Author's notes:**

-It was brought to my attention by my dear friend **BadLuckFox **that most people _like_ cold water. However, Gilbert is being irrational and stupid, so leave him alone. Personally, I hate water in general. I know I know, "You need water to live." I don't like logic... or facts.

-I'm just gonna say that 'West' is just a nickname for Ludwig that Gilbert gave to him. Since this is an AU fic, calling him West because of West Germany would be strange, so West is just a nickname, I don't know why. It would be a strange nickname, but who knows, maybe Gil has some weird reason behind it that never gets revealed (**Edit:** It actually _does_ get revealed in chapter 7 xD').


	2. The Awkwardly Friendly Russian

'ello! Here's chapter 2 for you lovely people~

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**WARNINGS:** Sensitive concepts/topics, swearing, use of alcohol, weird stuff, etc...

Edited: November 9th, 2012

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**~January 11th, 2013~**

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**

It was the same setup every time he went to the bar; drunks laying halfway on the tables, big-breasted women with their chests poking out clinging to some man's arm, the smell of meat, alcohol, and smoke filling the air, and loud music melting into the combined chaotic racket.

He didn't like silence, but excessive noise was just as bad, if not worse. It distorted his thoughts and annoyed him, whereas silence just made him nervous and anxious.

.

He ordered a beer and sat down in the corner that he always sat in, popped the top and began to drink.

About a quarter of the bottle was gone when the first woman came up to him, leaning on the table and propositioning him. Not long after that, another woman came by asking for the same thing, claiming that his red eyes were sexy and made her want him.

It disgusted him when women acted so disrespectful not only to themselves but to him. It was either he was a demon possessed freak or a sex god that all the ladies wanted. Neither of these assumptions are true... well, maybe except for the women wanting him, there seemed to be a lot of them.

.

He sighed, his beer was almost gone and he could feel himself getting a little buzzed. It seemed that everything in Russia caused him to get drunk easier, or maybe he was just a lot weaker than he thought. He still blamed it on Russia though, he could drink bottle after bottle back in Germany, but here in Russia one bottle of anything pretty much did him in. It was some sort of black magic that he did not like at all.

At least the pain in his cheek was fading now.

.

A young man approached the corner table he was at, "Hey hey, if it isn't Mr. Beilschmidt~!" he laughed, his voice full of merriment.

Gilbert looked up at him, thinking how odd it was to hear his last name, moreso being called 'Mr.'

He was young, looked to be around Gilbert's age, so around 20, give or take. Short messy blonde hair and blue eyes, glasses too. He was wearing a bartender's outfit, holding an empty glass in one hand and rubbing the inside with a cloth with the other.

"Oh, it's you..." Gilbert mumbled, trying to rack his brain for a name to put to his face. Assuming he's even _heard_ the man's name before.

"Dmitrii. Dmitrii Antonov." He said with a smile, "May I sit with you for a bit?" Gilbert stared at him for a second and then nodded. "You are very kind, sir."

.

There was a silence of the two looking around the bar and then back to each other, and then awkwardly breaking the glance whenever one would look back at the other.

"I see you come in here a lot, ." Dmitrii said suddenly, setting the sparkling clean glass on the table in front of him, the cloth next to it. "You're always alone, don't you have a family or a lady friend to keep you company?" he smiled at Gilbert, which earned him back a raised eyebrow and a slightly annoyed look.

"I'm not from around here." He started. "I was born in Berlin with my brother, but I moved here two years ago." He said, taking the final drink of his beer.

"Whoa~ from Germany!? I thought you had a bit of an accent. That's a little ways to travel... may I ask why?"

"A job." He grumbled, planting his bad cheek in his palm and wincing a little at the pain. "A job that promised me money, and instead is causing me to starve."

Dmitrii frowned, "I am sorry, I had no idea... hey," he said and leaned forward on the table, "I may not be able to offer you a job, but I can offer friendship, if you ever want to talk or just hang out, come see me, okay?"

Gilbert stared at him. Why was this man so friendly? Like they had known each other for years or something? "Ja, sure." He mumbled quietly.

"»Great!«" he exclaimed, beaming with a smile. "I'll get you another beer, yeah? It'll be on the house." He winked, which made Gilbert cringe a little. _He isn't, interested in me, is he? _He mentally asked himself, a little horrified by the idea.

It was the last thing he needed, a man on top of a bunch of women trying to get with him. However, this man was going about it in a better way than the women, he at least seemed to have respect for himself.

.

Gilbert sat in waiting for his new 'buddy' to return. He seemed a bit different than the other Russians here, his accent wasn't as thick and he didn't speak like the rest of them. _He obviously speaks Russian though..._ Gilbert thought to himself, trying to remember what Dmitrii had said, _It was like, 'oct-licky' or something right?_ Whatever, it wasn't important anyway.

"Here you go!" Dmitrii's loud voice knocked Gilbert out of his thoughts. The voice was followed by the slamming of the beer bottle on the table, which caused the albino to jump slightly. "One beer, on the house!"

"Danke." He mumbled. _Dammit, that was German. _He mentally facepalmed.

Dmitrii laughed, "No need to thank me, good sir."

Gilbert's attention was grabbed by the man's understanding, "You speak German?" he asked.

Dmitrii shrugged, "A little. I spent some time in Germany when I was younger." The Russian said, popping the cap on his own beer.

"I see..." Gilbert did the same and took a drink, "You're different from the typical Russian, what's your story?" he asked.

"I was born in America; my parents went there for a job a few years before I was born, kind of like you. I guess that is why I speak more like them." He said, setting his bottle on the table, "I came back to Russia to see my homeland, but instead I ended up in Germany somewhere and stayed for a few years, then packed back up and moved here." He said with a smile.

Gilbert blinked, "Uh... how old are you?" he asked awkwardly.

His question earned him a soft chuckle, "I'm almost 30."

"Ah... you look younger." Gilbert looked away, feeling a bit embarrassed.

"I get that a lot. What about you? You seem pretty young yourself." He asked, smiling amusedly.

"20. Almost 21" Gilbert answered quickly and took another drink.

Dmitrii smiled brightly, "You still have your entire life ahead of you, you'll figure something out. Just try not to work real hard, okay?"

"Yeah... I can't even _find_ work... just got fired today..." he closed his eyes, feeling that angry heat rise in his chest again.

"I am sorry... I know I cannot do much for you, but I am here if you need an ear."

Gilbert opened his eyes and looked at Dmitrii, "You don't know of anyone hiring for _anything?_" he hated how desperate he sounded, but the sad truth of it was just that, he _was_ desperate.

The Russian sighed and ran a hand through his hair, "Well, you do not seem like the escort type, seeing as many beautiful ladies have already approached you about that... However..."

Gilbert growled under his breath, "_What?_"

"... I hear that a local nobleman is looking for a new servant..." he said quietly.

"I can clean, I don't care, I can do it."

Dmirtrii frowned and leaned closer, "I would not... the man looking is Ivan Braginski." He said the name quietly as if it carried a curse with it.

Gilbert blinked at him, "Uh, who?"

The blonde mumbled something in Russian, rubbing his forehead, "You know of nothing do you, you hear no rumors? The man is shrouded in mystery; said to have killed many people, even to have raped several of his servants, both male and female. I've seen him in here once, he's a terrifying man."

Gilbert laid his head on the table, "It's all rumors, _right?_" he groaned, "I _need_ a job; I'm up to my ass in debt and my brother needs money to remodel his house, not to mention I need to pay for my apartment here."

Dmitrii sighed, "You can find someone else, just don't go to him."

Gilbert groaned loudly, the second beer was finally kicking in, "_Fiiiine_." He agreed, "I still need a job though..."

The blonde placed his hand on top of Gilbert's head and ruffled his hair, "You will find something, I am sure."

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Well that was chapter 2... hopefully you enjoyed it :)

I'm always looking for feedback~ I wanna know what you guys think as the story goes on :)

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**Author's Notes: **

-Whatever text is between the "» «" brackets was spoken in a different language~**  
**

-Yes, Gilbert blames his inability to hold his liquor on black magic. Don't ask, it's Prussian logic.

-For some reason, I _really_ like the interactions between Gilbert and Dmitrii.

-DunDUN**_DUN!_** Ivan's name has been mentioned! ... and he's apparently a wealthy nobleman xD

-Gilbert does _not_ become a prostitute. My best friend asked me if he does because apparently that seemed to be the direction that this story was heading... he doesn't, I promise xD


	3. Out Like a Candle's Flame

**Author's Notes: **

-This is a short chapter, I explain why at the end so please read that.

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**WARNINGS:** Sensitive concepts/topics, swearing, use of alcohol, weird stuff, etc…

Edited: November 9th, 2012

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**~January 11th, 2013~**

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**

As much as he hated to admit it, he was drunk. You would think that walking was the most difficult thing in the world, looking at him. He stumbled down the street and after a while he managed to actually walk in a somewhat straight line.

.

He let out a heavy exaggerated sigh. _Damn that stupid Dmitrii, him and his stupid free beer..._

Gilbert walked down the dark road. His stomach hurt, his head hurt. He really just wanted to sleep... if he could remember where his stupid apartment was he would just sleep when he got home and forget that this stupid day ever happened.

That sounded nice; a bed -regardless if it was cold or warm at this point-, soft blankets, just him. Sometimes being alone was the best thing; No one to bother him, tell him what to do, tell him to pick his clothes up, no one to tell him how to live his life.

Of course, when things go bad like they have gone today, it was better to have some warmhearted person waiting for you back home, ready to just relieve you of all your burdens and offer a shoulder to cry on.

.

.

He didn't even see what happened, but he hit something or someone. A streetlight maybe.

"Hey!" Definitely not a streetlight. Unless he was _really_ drunk. "Watch where you're going, punk!"

"S-Sorry." He mumbled, gazing over at the man. When his eyes focused he noticed that there were more people, four more.

"Oh... you think you can just bump into me, gaze over at me with your demon eyes, and I'll accept your half-assed apology?" He smirked and his friends seemed to know exactly what to do by moving to surround Gilbert.

"And he's drunk!" One of the men shouted from behind, adding a psychotic giggle to the end of his statement.

The laugh sent a shiver down Gilbert's spine.

.

Suddenly he felt a knot in his stomach, _This is bad..._ he thought to himself. He knew that he was in for something; but guys like this, they'll just rough him up a bit, take what's left of his money and leave.

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"So you are drunk and you give a poor apology?" he 'tsk'ed three times, "Bad idea, boy."

Gilbert growled a little. Even if he is drunk and about to get mugged, he is still Gil. Also known as a hot-headed, stubborn, confident, egotistical German.

.

"C-Can we play with him?" another, less sane voice asked. Were all of them mental or something?

"Oh, we'll play with him..." the ringleader said darkly, "Do it."

Suddenly, four arms gripped his, "Hey! Let go!" he shouted, which just made the men angrier.

The one on the right gripped the back of Gilbert's head, pulling on his hair roughly, "We're not letting you go at all!" another maniacal chuckle. The others laughed as well. The pain in Gilbert's scalp was causing his eyes to water; it didn't even hurt all that bad.

"He's crying! How cute!" one shouted.

"That's annoying." Another commented.

The one who noticed him 'crying' grabbed his chin roughly and forced him to look at him, "What a crybaby!" he shouted in his face.

"But... he's a pretty one." The one on the left smirked, "Hey boss, can we, _play_ with him?"

The boss scoffed, "I said that already did I not?"

"It's been a while since we nabbed a good lookin' boy!" Two of the hands on his right arm tightened, "And you're such a pretty man... your an escort right? Make lots of money screwing everyone?"

This pissed Gilbert off, "What!? No! I have too much self-respect for that!" he snapped back.

"Self-respect, hah..." the boss laughed, "You are that cocky bastard, that _German_, of course you are full of arrogance. I know who you are; your name is on all the ladies lips. They say you are possessed by a demon or somethin'."

"I'm _not_." Gilbert growled. This was another thing that pissed him off, being accused of carrying a demon inside himself just because his eyes are red.

"Yeah yeah, albino or somethin', I know... your looks are a curse... well, for you anyway."

.

That was the last thing he remembered hearing coherently. After that, it was just pain. Pain... a lot of pain. Warm liquid ran down his arms and legs, soaked his chest, and his pants- no, they were gone. Most of his clothes were gone and torn apart.

He felt like he was bleeding from every part of his body and his head ached. A loud shriek would fill his ears whenever his mouth was free. All he could hear was laughter and their insults, seeing their psychotic smiles gleaming in the night.

Everything was breaking and breaking him until he couldn't even breathe.

.

And then silence. The cold sinking in and the soft whistle of the wind being the only thing he could hear.

The pain was still throbbing throughout his entire body but the shadows of his attackers and their voices had left, the warmth brought to him by them and his own blood was fading quickly. He felt his body going numb and it was getting harder to breathe, his throat stung and felt swollen. He couldn't move his arms or legs, even when he tried, his muscles screamed and tightened, forcing him to stop any attempts he was making to move. Any chance of survival was slowly dimming out like a flame on a burning candle whose wick was getting close to the base. It fizzled out and disappeared, leaving him in cold darkness.

He was broken, left lying in a pile of frozen snow. The cold bit at his reddened skin, chilling him faster. He opened his eyes as best he could, but tears and blood stung them. It hurt too much, so he stopped trying, and just gave up.

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Blah... that's how I feel about this chapter. Just, blah.

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**Author's notes: **

-This chapter was originally going to be longer, but then I realized that I just didn't have it in me to write my favorite character in a detailed rape scene, I just can't do it. So I shortened it to a vaguely detailed indication of what happened to Gilbert, and even while this chapter is short, I believe you can clearly see that he is hurt and ready to give up.

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I'm still looking for feedback... I wanna know what you guys think... *sulks*


	4. Rabbit in Bear's Clothing

Thank god I wrote enough to get chapter 4 up soon, chapter 3 was too depressing for me -_-'

Anyway, this chapter is longer, about 5 pages, hope you enjoy!

.

**WARNINGS:** Sensitive concepts/topics, swearing, use of alcohol, weird stuff, etc...

Edited: November 9th, 2012

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**~January 12th, 2013~**

.

Was he dead? Probably not since he realized he was still breathing and asking questions about his consciousness.

It was strange, there was warmth but not from another human, like the warm sun beating down on him on a warm Spring day. The warmth came from thick blankets surrounding him snugly, like someone had tucked him in. Even the pain was distant.

Until he tried to move anyway.

.

He opened his eyes and it was pleasantly less painful this time, no tears or blood. There was a plain white ceiling above him and the room was filled with a soft glow of what seemed like morning or noon sun.

.

"So you are alive. Pity." A voice said from beside him. The voice was that of a woman, a young one it sounded. However the voice sounded mad, not to mention what she had just said was a pretty good indication of displeasure. Gilbert tried to speak, but all that came out was a ragged cough that burned his throat.

"Just barely, it would seem." She said and stood up. She was a young woman, with long blonde hair and navy blue eyes, wearing what looked like a maid's uniform. She moved to the side of the bed that Gilbert was in. "Your name, what is it?" it was more of a demand at an interrogation than a friendly introduction.

"G-Gil-" he coughed again, "Gilbert Beilschmidt."

"What a disgusting name." her nose scrunched up.

"T-Thanks..." he groaned. The pain was back, right in his ego... and his head.

"That was not a compliment." She said. Really, because _that_ wasn't obvious enough.

.

The woman moved out of Gilbert's line of sight and a door clicked open, or shut, he wasn't sure.

"He is alive, brother." The woman said again.

"Yes, it seems that way. you may leave now then." This time it was a man's voice.

"But brother-!"

"No buts, Bella." He said, "Please leave."

There was a tense silence before the door closed rather loudly.

.

Gilbert waited for the strange man to come into his eyeshot, and when he did, Gilbert's heart pounded in his chest once and he felt fear creeping back into his consciousness. He had never seen the man before, but that smile was overfriendly to the point of being scary.

He was wearing a white dress shirt, matching tan dress pants, tan leather knee-hi boots that his pants tucked into and a long white scarf around his neck.

.

"Do not look so scared." He said, pulling the chair that the woman was sitting in closer to the bed and sat down. "I am sorry if my sister frightened you, but you are alive, that is what matters, yes?" he smiled differently this time, an actual smile.

Even with this smile Gilbert was still scared; He woke up in a strange room with an even stranger woman at his bedside, and now this freaky man.

_Well they **are** siblings... _He thought to himself.

.

"You can speak, right?" he asked.

Gilbert nodded, "»Yeah,« I can."

"So you are German." He commented, "Welcome to Russia."

"I've been here for two years." He said and attempted to sit up. Every muscle in his body ached, but he leaned back against the headboard of the bed, the heavy blanket sliding off of his torso. He realized then that he wasn't wearing a shirt. He placed his hands gently on his chest, feeling bandages cover most of his pale skin.

"I treated your wounds last night. I hope you do not mine." The man said.

Gilbert shook his head slowly, "»Thank you...«" He said, "But, um... what happened to me?" he asked, blinking in confusion.

The man's friendly smile disappeared and was replaced was a serious frown, "You do not remember?"

Gilbert shrugged, "All I remember is some group of idiots, and then pain in my head."

"You were mugged." He said with a sigh, "And..."

"And? And what?"

"Raped." The word caused him pain just to say, Gilbert could see it in his face. Any relief he previously had was now gone.

He had to think about it for a second, and then the horror of what had happened to him finally etched its way onto his features.

.

"I am sorry I could not reach you faster." The man said, "However if I were any later you may have bled to death." He stood up and sat down on the edge of the bed, which made Gilbert shift uncomfortable slightly.

"Thank you..." he said cautiously.

"Your wounds are deep, but they will heal."

"Thank you."

The man gave him a funny smile, "You have already said that, a few times."

"I know, but..."

The man suddenly leaned forward and poked Gilbert's chest gently, "I will replace your bandages later."

"I can do it myself." Gilbert scoffed.

"Hah, you cannot." The man said and stood up.

"Hey! I don't need help!" Gilbert jumped up from the bed, but his legs gave in and he fell to the floor instantly, hissing in pain.

"It seems you do not understand what has happened to your body." He said and grabbed Gilbert's arm as gently as he could, lifting him and supporting him against himself. "You were beaten and raped severely. As a plus, you were thrown into a pile of snow. You are lucky you do not have frostbite and are lucky to be alive." As he explained this, he sat Gilbert carefully on the edge of the bed, then stood in front of him, "You will not be able to properly move or lift heavy objects for a few days, you should stay off of your feet as well."

"I can't have that!" Gilbert snapped and stood back up. His legs giving out once more and he tumbled right into the other man's chest.

"You are stubborn." He said, "Sit down." He pushed Gilbert gently and he fell onto the bed, the albino glared up at him. "I know. You were fired yesterday and cannot pay your landlord, and you do not have enough money to return home to Ludwig. That is his name, correct?"

Gilbert's eyes narrowed, "How do you know him?"

The man smiled and sat back in the chair across from the albino, "After I brought you in and fixed your wounds last night, I did a background check on you. Just to see who I had brought into my home."

Gilbert glared harder, "You had no right..."

"And it seems I have brought a disobedient dog into my home, but that is not cute at all..." he put a hand to his lips, thinking. Gilbert tilted his head and gave the man a 'wtf?' look. Seriously, what did being a dog or being cute have to do with this...? This man is so strange...

.

"Rabbit." He said suddenly, "That is what you are."

"A... rabbit?" Gilbert repeated.

"Yes, one of those albino ones." He said with a smile. "You look just like one. Although not nearly as cute, and your attitude and etiquette are less adorable than a rabbit's~"

"Rabbits can't even talk, idiot!" Gilbert yelled and stood back up for the third time. This time he managed to stay up, however... his loose pants did not.

It was at that moment that, with the cold draft on his nether-regions, he realized that he wasn't wearing underwear, just a bunch of bandages around his thighs and calves.

"Hm, you are correct~" the man said, looking down and smiling happily, and then closing his eyes.

Gilbert scrambled himself together and quickly pulled the baggy clothing back up around his waist, his face burnt red. He only hoped this creeper didn't see anything.

Of course, those bandages didn't get there on their own. So his hoping was pointless, since the man probably saw him naked while he was sleeping... little creepy.

.

"What is wrong with you!?" Gilbert yelled, for no reason other than to yell at him.

The man opened his eyes, "»What?«" he asked.

"Where are my clothes?" he asked, anger filling his voice.

The man spun the chair around and pointed to a small table along the wall of the room, "What is left of them is in that bag; your coat is not wearable, but your scarf seems to be the only thing that was not completely destroyed... I am sorry, but my clothing is all I have to offer you at the moment. I do not think you want to wear my sisters' clothing, although that would be fine with me~" he said turning back around, smiling.

"You... are so, weird..." Gilbert leaned back a bit. This guy was missing a few screws upstairs, wasn't he? Either that or he liked seeing men in women's clothing... which wasn't right either.

"Anyway," the man stood up, completely ignoring Gilbert's comment. "I will get you a long shirt, that way if your pants fall down again no one will see anything." He smiled and walked over to a small dresser.

Gilbert blushed slightly and felt a bit insulted by his comment. "Get me a belt, idiot!" he yelled, wanting to throw something at the man's back.

"»Yeah yeah~«" he hummed happily looking through the drawer.

.

Gilbert scanned the room a little before opening his mouth again, "So... um..." he mumbled quietly.

"Here." The man was suddenly in front of him, having not heard Gilbert's voice and offering him a pile of clothing which consisted of what looked like a long white button-up shirt, a pair of black pants which looked way too big for him and a black leather belt.

"Uh, thanks." He said, taking the clothing in his hands.

"Do you need help dressing?" He asked.

Gilbert was about to snap at him and yell no, but he was rational enough to realize that he would hurt himself and possibly reopen his wounds if he tried by himself. Besides, they're both adult men so it's fine, right? ... somehow when he told himself that, it sounded worse.

"Um, »Yeah, thank you...«" he said quietly looking away. He had to swallow a lot of pride for this one, but the reality of everything that happened to him was finally settling in, and he could use all the help he could get.

.

The man smiled kindly and took the shirt from the pile that was now sitting next to the albino and carefully slid Gilbert's bruised arms into the white sleeves, buttoning it up after he was done.

He then took something from the pile that Gilbert had missed; boxers. "I will let you put these on yourself, if you wish..." he said.

Gilbert nodded and took them from him. The taller man sat in the chair and turned away from him to give him privacy, which Gilbert appreciated.

He removed the baggy pants as quickly as he could without causing much pain, and then slid the boxers up his legs. Bending his arms and legs so much caused spikes of hot pain to rush throughout his body, causing small sharp hisses escaped his lips.

"Are you alright?" The man asked worriedly.

"»Y-Yeah«, I'm fine." He panted slightly. The pain was starting to make him a little lightheaded.

He pulled the boxers up around his waist and sat there for a moment just staring at the man's back. He was large, not fat, but just big in general. He was a bit scary and seemed to be a little eccentric, but he seemed nice enough so Gilbert didn't really mind the weirdness.

.

"Um..." Gilbert mumbled.

"Done?" he asked.

"»Yeah...«"

The man turned around instantly, smiling. He stood back up and grabbed the black pants; he kneeled in front of Gilbert and carefully held one of his legs to slide it into the pant-leg. He repeated this with the other side and then pulled the hem up to his knees.

"Can you stand?" he asked, looking up at him.

Gilbert nodded, "Yeah." He said and stood up with him. His legs were shaking from just standing there.

The other looked down at him and saw the pain in his pale face, "You can hold onto me if that will make it easier." He said.

As much as Gilbert didn't want to, he gripped the other's arms and leaned into him as much as he could without it being creepy.

.

Although it couldn't _get_ much creepier, right? A strange man helping him put his pants on? Well, there's a first time for everything...

.

He pulled the pants up around Gilbert's waist and gently pushed him to sit on the bed again, and then he zipped up the zipper and buttoned the front carefully. He reached for the belt and began to work it through the loops on Gilbert's pants.

Suddenly, Gilbert found himself in an awkward (at least on his part), indirect hug with him, as he had to slide the belt through the loops in the back.

If it was anyone else he would have pushed him away, but this strange man has helped him more than anyone ever has when he was hurt, and he didn't even know him; there was no reason for him to help him other than the kindness of his heart.

He just swallowed more of his pride and accepted it.

.

"There, you are done." He said and stepped back from Gilbert.

The albino scanned himself. Other than that it was a little big on him, the outfit was one that he would wear. He looked up at the taller man, "»Thank you.«" He said with a small smile.

"»Yeah...«" he mumbled and paused for a few seconds, "I, would like to discuss something with you, Gilbert." He said and sat back in the chair.

"Yeah? what?"

"You are unemployed and will be thrown out of your apartment. I am also aware of your inability to find a second job..." he went on.

"Yeah, what of it?" Gilbert asked, feeling a vein twitching. He really didn't want to talk about his failures right now...

"I am looking for a new employee," he said, "I would like you to work for me, if that is fine with you."

Gilbert's eyes widened a little, "Wait... are you that Ivan, what's-his-name?"

"Braginski." He said, "»Yeah«, I am." His voice had a sad tone to it.

"Oh..." Gilbert mumbled, remembering the other night with Dmitrii. "Your name has a bit of a dark cloud over it..."

"»Yeah«, I know..." he looked down. Gilbert felt his heart jump once and a weird feeling in his stomach... guilt?

"H-Hey! Don't let them get you down!" He yelled, not really sure what he was even doing. Ivan looked up strangely at the outburst, blinking his violet eyes at him. "I didn't think the rumors were true anyway! You seem like a nice guy, people just don't get to know you, right?" He smiled widely, his previous energy and his regular proud personality starting to show through.

Ivan blinked a few times and then smiled a little, "»Thank you.«" He said quietly, not expecting the sudden enthusiasm from the albino.

.

"You're looking for someone who can clean, right?" Gilbert said eagerly, his attitude suddenly changed from being completely drained and almost dead, to beaming and excited.

Ivan thought for a second, "»Yes,« and someone to run small errands for me. Minor things..."

"Heck, I can do that!" Gilbert exclaimed proudly.

"Good... then, you are hired?" Ivan smiled slightly.

"If you pay me good so I can pay for my apartment, sure."

Ivan laughed, "You do not have to worry about your apartment, you will be staying here."

Gilbert blinked in surprise, "Really?"

"»Yes,«" Ivan said and stood back up, "I will pay for food and clothing. All you must do is follow simple orders." He smiled.

Gilbert stood on his feet, wobbling from side-to-side a little. He looked up at the taller man once he regained his balance, "Well I guess that's that, then, huh?" he said with a broad smile.

Ivan's face softened, his lips turning up into a little smile, "»Yes,« I look forward to working with you."

* * *

Well that's chapter 4, hope ya liked it :)

I'm always looking for feedback~ I wanna know what you guys think as the story goes on :)

.

**Author's notes: **

-Whatever text is between the "» «" brackets was spoken in a different language~

-I want to write more scenes between Gilbert and Natalia, I think they would have a fun relationship; probably one that mostly consists of Natalia hitting Gilbert in the head.

-Ivan calls Natalia "Bella" as a nickname, sort of like how Gilbert calls Ludwig "West". They're just nicknames given to them, with no actual reference to the countries they represent.

-Ivan has a soft side for cute animals (such as rabbits) and he tends to act very sweet when he thinks of them to the point of sounding and looking creepy, which results in people (like Gilbert) giving him strange looks, especially when he compares people (like Gilbert) to said animals... I like creepy-sweet Ivan :3

-Hehe, Gilbert lost his pants. Poor Rabbit~

-I feel like Ivan and Gilbert have already developed a love-hate relationship. Ivan likes to tease him but he really cares, and Gilbert hides behind a tough mask and says that Ivan is creepy when he actually thinks he's really nice. Ah, Bromance~

-Ivan is like a loving mother caring for a sick child. I think it's sweet...

-I also think it's sweet how Gilbert gives Ivan a bit of a confidence boost about the cloud his name carries. Gilbert is one of those people who can cheer someone up very easily, but he sometimes takes it too far and just starts annoying people~

-So, what will happen now that Gilbert is working for Ivan...?


	5. A Pretty Shade of Purple

Laaaaaa Chapter 5! :D

.

**WARNINGS:** Sensitive concepts/topics, swearing, use of alcohol, weird stuff, etc...

Edited: November 9th, 2012

* * *

**~January 12th, 2013~ **

.

Gilbert pushed the door to Ivan's study room open as fast as he could, the wood slamming back against the decorative panel and creating an awful snapping sound. Small beads of water flung off of his hair, still wet from the long shower he just took.

Ivan didn't even flinch and he looked up from his paperwork with an annoyed look on his face, tapping the tip of his black pen on the shiny dark brown wood of his desk.

"Ivan!" Gilbert yelled and rushed into the room, slamming his hands down on the Russian's desk, "I need to get a hold of Ludwig! I told him I'd call him this morning to tell him I'm alright!"

Ivan looked more annoyed at this point, droplets of water splattering on his face from the German's soaked hair. Really, must he be _this_ spastic? "Then call him." The Russian said simply, wiping the water off of his face with a gloved finger.

"I would but I don't have my phone..." Gilbert said looking down. Those thugs must have taken off with it, along with his money and I.D. Wonderful.

Ivan sighed heavily and leaned back in his chair, "Then why are you coming to me about this?"

"Because you did a background check on me and found out about him, you _should_ have his number somewhere." He explained, "Do you still have the files?"

Ivan pushed himself away from his desk and opened a small drawer, took out a tan folder and tossed it across the desk at Gilbert. "There."

"»Thanks!«" Gilbert yelled happily, grabbing the folder and bolting out the door, slamming it shut just as hard as he had opened it.

.

Ivan leaned back in his chair again and rubbed his temples. It had only been three hours since the German woke up, and he spent nearly two of those hours in the shower, and yet he was already causing so much noise.

But he smiled to himself; He kind of liked the disoriented chaotic atmosphere Gilbert has around him, it was a nice change from the quiet dreariness his home had always possessed.

He chuckled, "I wonder, what you will tell your brother..."

.

.

Gilbert found the nearest phone and threw the folder onto the table next to it, opening it and rummaging through a bunch of his own files.

It was a little embarrassing, the fact that Ivan may have read through all of these and knew all his little secrets... let's hope not.

He found his brother's number and picked up the phone, dialing it quickly and then double-checking to make sure he hit all the right buttons. He really should dedicate some brain power to memorizing his own brother's phone number; it would really be handy in situations such as this.

.

The phone rang once. That was it.

Next thing Gilbert heard was a very loud voice yelling, switching in and out between German and English.

"Erm, h-hey West." was the only thing he could say at first, hoping his brother wouldn't be _too_ upset with him.

"What the hell Gilbert!? Didn't I tell you to call me in the morning!? It's 1pm!" But he was upset. Very upset.

"I know I know..." he mumbled.

"So, what was it? A one night stand or something?" Ludwig groaned.

The albino gave the phone a skeptical look, "... really West? _That's_ what you're going with?" Gilbert raised an eyebrow. "You should know me well enough to know I'd never do something like that."

"Sorry, I just went with a wild guess." Ludwig apologized, "So, what happened?"

"I got mugged." Gilbert said and leaned on the desk, holding the phone between his shoulder and ear.

There was a pause, "Mugged? Are you okay?"

Gilbert shrugged, "Eeh, lost the rest of my money and my ID. I'm little banged up, some cuts and bruises, and my ass hurts, can't sit properly. Other than that, I'm fine." He said.

"... what? Why can't you sit...?" Ludwig asked hesitantly.

"I was raped." He said as if it was nothing, but he could practically see his brother's face fall in despair when he said that.

"Gilbert where are you?" Ludwig said, his voice a little shaky but still stern.

"In a house."

"Gilbert..." he groaned.

"Sorry sorry~ I'm fine though, I mean, I'm not _okay_, but I'm not dead or anything, obviously." He said, "Although I would have been dead, but some strange guy found me."

"Strange guy?" Ludwig commented.

"»Yeah,« some rich guy. He took me in and patched me up, cleaned my wounds and everything, even gave me some of his clothes to wear." Gilbert felt his lips pull into a tiny smile, he never actually spoke of it out loud; it made him realize just how much Ivan had done for him without being asked or anything.

"At least you're safe now..." Ludwig sighed, "But, what do you plan to do?"

"I have a new job." Gilbert said almost proudly.

"Already?" Ludwig asked in surprise.

"Yep! The guy who helped me, he was looking for a new servant or helper. We talked and he said he'd hire me if I was up for it." Gilbert explained, "So I took it."

"What about your apartment, and food?" his brother asked worriedly.

"All taken care of!" the albino said smugly, "Ivan, the guy, said I could stay with him. Said he'd provide food and even clothing."

Ludwig went silent for a moment, "You've put a lot of trust into this man... I hope he comes through for you."

Gilbert sighed with a heavy annoyance, "He will, I promise."

"Well last time you made a promise you said you wouldn't get yourself killed, and you almost did." He said, "Just... call if anything happens, alright? I mean it this time."

"»Yeah yeah~« promise."

"Gil..." Ludwig said quietly.

"Hm?"

"Stop making promises."

.

.

"There you are~" Ivan said, lurking in the shadows... of the brightly lit hallway.

Gilbert jumped a little, not expecting the man to suddenly be there right outside the bathroom when he got out. "Don't sneak up on me like that!" he yelled.

The Russian blinked confusedly, "I did not."

"Right, that's what you-"

"How are you feeling?" Ivan took a step closer to Gilbert. "Are you alright?"

Gilbert stared at him, a little irked that he interrupted him but also a little overwhelmed by his concern. "Little sore, but over all I'm good." He smiled a little.

"Good." Ivan said and gripped his arm. "Come, I must put new bandages on." Gilbert was too dumbfounded to think of a reply and found himself being dragged down the hall. Ivan was right though, his wounds were open to the air at the moment, he had to remove the bandages on his legs and chest to take a shower, but his legs were feeling better, and there weren't any severe cuts on them, just small ones that didn't need bandaging. It was his chest that had the worst of it.

Come to think of it, he didn't even look at his chest. He didn't really want to see it...

.

"Sit on the bed." Ivan instructed once they were in the room. Gilbert did and watched the Russian with a raised eyebrow. He retrieved a white plastic box from a drawer and walked back to the albino.

"Do you have first aid stuff in every room?" Gilbert asked with a smirk.

"Are you complaining? I could not bandage you and watch your wounds get infected." Ivan said, not looking at him, hiding a small smile to himself.

"Eh... t-that's... not what I..." _What the hell did I say that made him so touchy? Jeeze._..

The Russian smiled, "We don't want you to die, now do we?" He said with sweet sarcasm dripping from his voice.

Gilbert pouted obnoxiously, catching Ivan's sarcasm. "And here I thought you liked me~" he whined teasingly.

Ivan said nothing and suddenly began to undo the buttons of Gilbert's shirt.

"What are you doing!?" Gilbert yelled and grabbed Ivan's hands in shock.

"You have wounds on your chest; the shirt is in the way." He said, almost glaring at the silver haired man.

"Oh... r-right..." he let go of the Russian's hands and looked away, feeling a little bad and embarrassed. Ivan held back a smile; this man was going to destroy himself, wasn't he? However, it was rather amusing to watch.

.

His, or actually Ivan's shirt laid next to him on the bed along with the first aid kit and his new bandages.

"You have not seen this wound yet, right? ... it is the worst one you have." Ivan said while preparing the new bandages.

Gilbert hesitantly looked down at his chest. He'd never seen big wounds like this aside from in movies he used to watch with Ludwig, but this... this was real. It made him lightheaded just looking at it. It was a deep cut that stretched across his chest, diagonal up the center. It feels like the skin was tightening around it every time he breathed deeply.

Suddenly Ivan's bare hand touched the gash, rubbing some strange substance over the raw skin.

Gilbert hissed at the sudden cold sensation, his eyes starting to water a little bit from the pain. "W-What is that stuff?" he asked, his voice a little shaky.

"Ointment." Ivan said and leaned closer to look as he rubbed the cold gel on his wound, "You are shaking. Relax, you are fine." He reassured him, looking up at him with violet eyes.

.

Was he... blushing?

... Oh god, he hoped not...

Still... his eyes were a pretty shade of purple.

.

Ivan stood back from the German and looked at him, now wrapped in fresh bandages, "I am going out to town. I will leave you here for today so you can rest."

Gilbert scoffed as he put his shirt back on, "I'm perfectly fine."

"Mmhm~ that is why it hurts for you to sit, correct~?" Ivan smiled at him childishly.

"H-How do you know about that!?" Gilbert turned a little red.

"Lucky guess~" he lied, he heard him talking to Ludwig, although it wasn't too hard to assume it in the first place. "Regardless, we need you in better condition to be working for me, yes?"

"S-Sure, I'll be back on my feet in no time." Gilbert nodded, trying not to let Ivan's grin freak him out too much.

"Good~ I will be leaving soon. Please, if you can, introduce yourself to my sisters."

"Sisters?" Gilbert swallowed.

"Yes, they might... appreciate, someone like you, Sofia will at the least. I have two; one you met already, she is Natalia, she is very... protective, of me. My older sister Sofia is out at the moment, but she should be back any minute. She is skittish but very sweet, please treat her good." He explained.

"So one will rip my face off and the other will be scared of me?" That's what Gilbert got from that explanation.

"More or less." Ivan chuckled lightly at the exaggerated mental image of his sisters, Gilbert didn't know it but he wasn't far off from the truth. "Just don't make Natalia angry or hurt me."

"Oh I'm not afraid of a little-"

"No, I'm serious. She will kill you." He warned with a stern look.

"Ah..." was the only sound that would leave the German's mouth.

"Well, have a nice time~" Ivan said cheerfully and walked away smiling, leaving Gilbert speechless.

_Just who do I live with now...?_

* * *

I'm always looking for feedback~ I wanna know what you guys think as the story goes on :)

.

**Author's notes:**

-I understand that it would be hard to not look at your chest while taking a shower... however, let's assume that Gilbert just stood there staring at a wall xD**  
**

-Ivan's way of teasing Gilbert is, to me, hilarious. So violent yet so adorable~ **  
**

-I went with the name Sofia for Ukraine because her name possibilities stated by Himaruya in 2010 are Irunya Chernenko, Maria, and Sofia. I just like the name Sofia and it's easier to type~


	6. Meeting the Skittish One

Short chapter time! Whoo!-*isshot*

.

**WARNINGS:** Sensitive concepts/topics, swearing, use of alcohol, weird stuff, etc...

Edited: November 9th, 2012

* * *

**~January 12th, 2013~ **

.**  
**

Gilbert wandered around the unfamiliar house; he never actually got the chance to explore. However with that demon woman wandering around somewhere, he really didn't want to start exploring without someone with him. Preferably Ivan since he's the thing's older brother.

.

He eventually found himself at what looked to be the front door; it was big and decorative and the huge staircase leading upstairs was a hint that this was the main foyer or something. He slumped himself onto a loveseat by the front door. He looked around and thought to himself, his thoughts finally catching up to him. His entire life had been turned upside down within the last day. He didn't even realize all that happened until he sat down and thought about it. He brought one of his pale hands to his eye. Tears. They were just starting to form at his eyes.

"Why am I crying..." he mumbled to himself, touching his wet eyes as if unfamiliar with what tears were. His thoughts were a jumble; the only thing he could clearly remember was the pain. The idea of what happened was disgusting. Not knowing the details of what they did to him made him mad; part of him wanted to know exactly what happened so he could eventually be at peace with the truth. His body was violated horribly and he hated that fact to the point that he wanted to rip his skin off. The entire thing had his emotions flipping from sad to angry rapidly. He didn't know what to do with himself anymore. The tears started to flow out of the corners of his eyes and he didn't understand why, they just kept coming. He felt something in his throat that felt like a strangled cry, and he was torn on whether he wanted to let it out or just swallow it and save it for the next time he was alone.

"»Oh my goodness!«" A female voice sounded in Russian, followed by a thud. Gilbert looked up and before he knew it his tear-soaked face was in the gloved hands of this short-haired woman, her fingers wiping his cheeks desperately, "Are you alright?" she asked worriedly.

"Y-Yeah I'm fine..." Gilbert mumbled in confusion.

"You are Gilbert, aren't you? Brother told me about you..." Gilbert only nodded. "I heard what happened to you... you poor baby!" she cried and hugged him, planting his face into her chest and holding him tightly.

"Y-You must be Sofia..." he mumbled, trying to breathe in her inhumanly sized bust.

"Ah, I am sorry." She said and let him go, "Yes, I am. I am Ivan's older sister." She smiled warmly.

"He told me to introduce myself to his sisters, so uh... hi, I'm Gilbert Beilschmidt." He smiled awkwardly.

"»Hello« Gilbert, I am Sofia Braginski. I apologize for almost strangling you." She smiled shyly.

Gilbert laughed, "It's fine; I needed a hug anyway..." He smiled a little.

Sofia blinked her baby blue eyes at him, "Do you want another one?" She asked and wiped under his still wet eyes.

He scrunched his nose up like an embarrassed child being coddled when he didn't want to be, "Nah, I'm fine, thanks anyway." He said.

Sofia smiled and grabbed one of his hands, "Come. I would like to get to know the newest member of our home."

.

.

Sofia had gone out shopping and Gilbert didn't even realize she dropped her bag when she entered the house. She dragged him into the kitchen after re-gathering her bag. The kitchen looked extravagant; Gilbert wasn't one for interior decorating but this house was really beautiful, even he had to admit that.

.

Sofia set her bad on a counter in the middle of the kitchen, "You are from Germany, correct?" she asked as Gilbert sat himself in one of the hard chairs carefully, his lower body was still aching. "I remember visiting Berlin when I was younger; beautiful city. Ivan was only 17 at the time, he grew up so fast~" she smiled, remembering fond memories of her younger days.

Gilbert leaned onto the table, squishing his cheek into his palm and just listened to her ramble on. She went on about her brother and sister, she seemed to really enjoy her siblings; although she did mention that Natalia was sometimes unmanageable and a little insane, and Ivan tended to keep to himself and seemed sad a lot of the time.

He faded out of her conversation and began to think about his own brother. Was he really worried? Was he lonely back home without him? Or was Feliciano keeping him company? That hyper little Italian always had a smile on his face and he always seemed to be able to bring Ludwig's spirits up; it made him a little jealous even, but Gilbert knew that Ludwig liked Feliciano. It's hard _not_ to like him.

"And then, he almost caught the house on fire!" she laughed, vividly remembering whatever memory she was thinking of.

"Wait, what?" Gilbert blinked, an amused look on his face. He was a little taken off-guard after being lost in his own thoughts but he was fully interested in what she was talking about now.

"Before I went to Berlin, I had to teach Ivan to cook, and well... he's better at, other things..." she smiled nervously.

For some reason, that sounded _really_ weird to Gilbert. _What other things..._ he wondered.

"Ha~ Well now I have some blackmail on him." He chuckled.

"Haha, not a good idea Gilbert~" she hummed, "Natalia is violent, sure, but that's when someone threatens to 'steal' Ivan or hurts him. Even though you are joking, he might appear upset to Natalia." She said, "And well, I think enough of your blood has been spilled lately, yes?"

Gilbert's face went pale, "Um... who would be making me bleed?"

"Depends on if you actually upset Ivan and if he feels like dirtying his hands. Natalia will gladly do it though..."

Gilbert groaned, "How morbid." Honestly, who the _hell_ did he live with now? Now Ivan is a psychotic killer too? Jeeze... he hid it pretty well though.

.

"I wanted to ask you something, Sofia." He looked at her seriously.

"Hm? What is it?" she asked, sitting down across from him.

"You said earlier that you wanted to get to know the 'newest member of your home', how did you know I would be staying?" he asked.

She smiled sweetly, "Oh dear, I knew as soon as Ivan carried you through the door last night that you'd be staying, regardless of if you took his job offer or not." She said with a slightly creepy smile.

This confused Gilbert, "How?"

Sofia sighed lightly, fiddling her fingers on the glossy black counter, "Ivan tends to keep things that he likes, and I'd say he likes you a lot." She said and then blushed slightly, "Ah! B-But probably not in _that_ way!" she defended herself frantically.

"Uh..."

"He gets attached to things easily, and he won't let go unless it leaves or dies." She said quietly, a sad look coming to her features, "He feels like he has to force his love on the people around him." She said sadly.

Suddenly Dmitrii's voice rang in Gilbert's head.

"It's sad, all of the servants we've had left after a few days. Said that Ivan was too scary and were worried that the rumors were true..." She droned on.

"Rumors of him beating and raping his servants?" Gilbert asked, lowering his voice.

Sofia nodded slightly, "So you have heard them as well. He has never touched anyone. He makes an effort to not touch a person without their consent. He will barely even hug Bella and me... you were the exception though, you were hurt so he thought it was okay." She had a look that made it seem like Gilbert was upset that Ivan helped him. It made him feel bad. How could he ever be angry after all that Ivan has done for him?

"Hey it's fine, I would have died if it wasn't for him. But... there's also rumors of him killing-"

A door slamming cut him off, "I am home~" a voice called out. Both Gilbert and Sofia recognized it as Ivan.

Sofia touched Gilbert's hand lightly, "I cannot speak any more." She said and rushed out to greet her brother.

.

Gilbert followed and just in time to see Sofia hug Ivan, who was covered in now melting flakes of snow.

He didn't hug her back. Gilbert's eyes narrowed a little bit; actually seeing what Sofia said about Ivan not hugging her made him a little uneasy, and slightly pissed off.

"Hey, welcome back." Gilbert said and leaned on the door frame of the kitchen. Both Ivan and Sofia gave him a strange and shocked look. "What?" he asked, wondering why they were both looking at him.

Ivan brushed his hair free of the snow, "None of my employees have welcomed me home."

"Well _I_ did. Get used to it." He growled and looked to the side, his irritation and embarrassment showing.

"Well, thank you." Ivan smiled, and Sofia blinked up at her brother, "You seem to be in better condition than when I left." Ivan commented on the German's aggravated persona.

"Yeah, I'm fine." He said and then pointed to Sofia, "I met her. I like her, she's nice." He said, "I haven't seen the other one."

"Natalia is probably in her room upstairs..." Sofia said smiling.

"You will meet her later." Ivan said, "For now, come with me, Gilbert." The Russian began to walk down the hall, giving Gilbert a little smile as he passed him. Gilbert gave him a raised eyebrow in return and ran to catch up to him, shoving his hands into his pockets.

Sofia stood there smiling. She hadn't heard a 'thank you' from her brother in a very long time. It was a nice change.

She had to make sure to thank Gilbert personally later.

* * *

I'm always looking for feedback~ I wanna know what you guys think as the story goes on :)

.

**Author's Notes:**

-_| Preferably Ivan since he's the thing's older brother. |_ ... yeah, Gilbert might have the wrong idea here; I think Natalia would attack him even faster.

-I was originally going to make Sofia more shy and a little scared, but then a spazzy, mother-like character just came out as I wrote her and well, it just kinda stuck ^^'

-Sofia is very open with Gilbert, obviously. This is a little hint at her wish for things to be better for her brother. She knows that Gilbert has already changed how Ivan acts for the better, so she's hoping it will continue.


	7. Comfort with a Side of Sarcasm

Welcome my lovelies, to Chapter 7.  
We have some realizations happening toward the end of this one, so hopefully the fans of this fic will like those... um... well, enjoy :)

.

**WARNINGS:** Sensitive concepts/topics, swearing, use of alcohol, weird stuff, etc...

Edited: November 9th, 2012

* * *

**~January 12th, 2013~**

.

The albino followed Ivan to a room upstairs, one he had never been in before. The Russian flipped the lights on, "This will be your room." He said and walked further in and set his shopping bag on the end of the fairly large bed. He turned to Gilbert with a soft smile on his lips, "I need to talk to you."

"Eh? Alright, what is it?" Gilbert asked.

"Well, I went shopping..." he started and turned away from the smaller man. "I bought you some clothing, hopefully they will fit."

Gilbert groaned to himself, but actually feeling a bit flattered. "You didn't have to..."

"You have no other clothing except for mine, and I am assuming you do not want to wear my sisters' clothing. You could go back to your apartment to get your things though." Ivan said, looking at him.

He really was on this woman's clothing thing, huh? Hopefully staying here wouldn't have a negative affect on his manliness... although, he wasn't really _that_ manly to begin with. People always said he was pretty, not exactly handsome or good-looking. Just, _pretty_.

"I don't have much back there, but I'll go back later." Gilbert said, "Can I try on the new clothes now, though? Your pants make my ass look weird." He said pulling on the oversized pair of pants.

This made the Russian laugh lightly, "I did not know your ass was of that much concern to you. I would have shopped differently had I known. Hopefully your ass will be to your liking in your new clothes." He was mocking him, his lips turning up into a small grin.

Gilbert smirked, noticing the sarcasm in Ivan's voice. "Did you pick out clothing that would glorify my _awesome_ body~?" he teased right back.

"Ivan shrugged, still grinning. "I picked what I thought would look good."

"I'll take that as a yes~" Gilbert laughed.

Ivan looked at him out of the corner of his eye; he was rummaging through the bag of clothing. His joke just now... he didn't really know how to respond other than to smile and make his own snide comments. He liked Gilbert's way of joking; he was arrogant and proud of himself, and he obviously didn't mind being somewhat flirty, even with another man. He was blunt as well, Ivan liked it.

Perhaps he did pick out clothing he'd like to see on the German after all.

.

"Whoa~" Gilbert's eyes practically sparkled as he pulled a blue jacket out of the bag, "This is nice!"

"Glad you like it." Ivan said, "I thought you might; you seem like a military man."

Gilbert laughed a little, "Yeah, my old man fought in a few wars; sent me and West our crosses before he was captured and killed." Gilbert explained and reached into his shirt, pulling out the black and silver iron cross. "Thanks for finding this for me... I don't know what I'd do without it..." he gazed at it sentimentally.

"Your attackers did not take it, luckily. The string was broken but easily fixed." Ivan said.

_So he fixed my cross too... _

"Well thanks. This is the only thing we have left of our old man, it's pretty important to us." He pressed the cold cross to his lips and whispered, "»Rest in peace, father...«" his ruby eyes closed gently.

Ivan watched him for a second, giving him a moment to respect his father, "May I ask you a question, Gilbert?"

The albino blinked up at him, "Yeah, shoot."

"You said 'West', I am assuming that is your brother Ludwig?" he asked.

"Yep, my little bro~" he smiled smugly.

"Why do you call him West?"

Gilbert laughed, "Our Pa gave him that nickname when he was off fighting, something about Ludwig being hardworking like the people out West. He was just happy to have a nickname, pleased the little brat like he had just one tons of money. I think I'm the only one who still uses the nickname." He smiled a little.

"What about you, then? Any nicknames?" Ivan asked.

Gilbert shrugged, "People call me Gil for short. Stupid women call me Gilly."

"Nothing else?" Ivan smiled a little; Gilbert's hate for women was a little obvious to him, and it was something he could relate to.

"Ah well... I got jealous of West's name so Pa used to call me East because I was the total opposite of Ludwig."

"So the other brat was pleased as well~" Ivan teased him, chuckling. Total opposite, huh? Ivan thought Ludwig sounded rather boring now.

"Oh shut up!" Gilbert yelled and punched Ivan's arm playfully. He paused for a second and realized that he kind of just assaulted him. "Uh... don't tell your crazy murderous sister about that, 'kay?" he lied earlier when he said he wasn't afraid of her.

Ivan laughed and his eyes softened, "Do not worry, she will not find out."

.

Gilbert gathered the rest of the blue military-like outfit and went to the bathroom connected to his new room, which was a nice feature.

He really liked it. The blue made his ruby eyes stand out, although he wasn't sure if that was a good thing or not; his eyes tended to get him in trouble. He left the collar of the jacket open as well as the first few buttons of a new, better fitting white shirt; it was open just enough that his beloved iron cross shone between his collarbones.

.

"Well? What do you think?" Gilbert asked, smirking and turning in multiple directions in front of the seemingly amused Russian.

"You look more civil and well-mannered than you really are, I like it." Ivan jabbed at him, smiling a little.

"Gee, thanks." Gilbert groaned. Really, must Ivan _always_ tease and joke with him? ... then again, he did kind of start the teasing war they seemed to be caught in.

"I have something else for you." Ivan stood up from his seat on the bed and turned around.

"You sure are spoiling me~" Gilbert said cutely, almost hoping for a reaction from him.

Ivan pulled a long box close to himself, "Think of it as an early birthday gift from me to you."

"Oh, right..." Gilbert had completely forgotten about his birthday. He hadn't even celebrated it since the last year he was back with Ludwig, and he guessed Ivan found out from the background check he did on him.

"You are turning twenty one next week, correct?"

"Ja, the 18th." Gilbert said and walked over to Ivan.

"Well these are another early gift." The Russian showed Gilbert the contents of the box, "I hope they fit as well."

"Wow..." Gilbert mumbled. He was staring at two shiny black leather knee-hi lace up boots with a small heel on them. "These must have cost a lot..." he said quietly, feeling a little bad now.

"It is fine. Rarely do I spend money; it was actually rather entertaining to buy things." He smiled, "However, people were giving me strange looks when I bought a bunch of clothing that is obviously too small for me."

"I said I would go but you made me stay." Gilbert said mockingly.

"And have you falling all over me because you cannot stand for a long time? No... however, if you would like to prove yourself, I have a small errand I need taken care of. It shouldn't be too strenuous on your body if you are careful."

"Sure thing! What do you need me to do?" Gilbert beamed with a bright smile.

Ivan smiled at his eagerness; He never had a servant who actually seemed to _want_ to work for him. "I placed an order for a case of vodka at a local tavern. I'd like you to pick it up for me."

"Sounds easy enough~" Gilbert agreed.

"Excellent. I will write down the address and give you a paper stating that you can pick up my order." He said and began to walk to the door.

.

Gilbert sat on the floor, pulling on the left boot of his new footwear on and tucking his matching blue pants into them. He was lacing up the right boot as Ivan walked back into the room.

"How do they fit?" the Russian asked.

Gilbert smiled as he tied the black laces into a tight knot. "Perfectly." He turned his head to see the man behind him and looked up smiling, "They're the right size."

"How do they feel to walk in?" Ivan asked another question.

Gilbert hopped up to his feet a little too quickly and much to his dismay, felt pain shoot down his back. "D-Dammit, that hurt..." Ivan's eyes softened, he didn't wish pain on the man but he also wanted to chuckle at how easily Gilbert set himself up for failure. It certainly was amusing. Gilbert regained his balance and walked back and forth and twisted his ankles, "That's nice..." he mumbled while almost smirking, "Flexible, and easy to walk in..."

"You seem very happy with them." Ivan commented on the seemingly obsessed German.

"Yeah, I am. I haven't had a nice pair of boots like these in a _long_ time."

"That is good." Ivan walked to him, "Here, this is the address and 'warrant' to pick up my order." He handed Gilbert a small piece of paper that had Ivan's full name written on the bottom corner.

Gilbert studied the paper for a second, "Hey wait, I know this place. I was just drinking there last night before-" he cut himself off, swallowing hard. He didn't even realize until then, but he was afraid to go back to that area.

Ivan noticed the sudden change in Gilbert's attitude and grabbed his wrist and pulled him out of the room.

"H-Hey, what are you doing?" Gilbert asked; his wrist was starting to hurt under Ivan's grip.

"I am going with you." Ivan said seriously, "I would be an idiot to send you back alone to the very place you were hurt so badly."

Gilbert blushed a little at the sincere tone of Ivan's voice. "You don't have to!" he yelled, panicking slightly.

Ivan stopped in his tracks, "I do not have to, no. I want to." He began to walk again, his grip loosening on the albino's skinny wrist. Gilbert kept quiet and even he didn't know why; this man just had a way with shutting him up.

.

Ivan led him back to the front door. He let go of Gilbert and walked to a coat-rack, picking up a long black trench. "Wear this, it is one of my older ones so it may fit." Ivan said and handed it to Gilbert. He took it and slid his arms into the sleeves and then buttoned and tied the front. It fit perfectly, "Good, let us go now." He grabbed Gilbert's wrist again and pulled him out the front door; screechy protests coming from the albino's mouth.

.

"H-Hey, could you not pull me like this?" Gilbert asked, finally stopping his childish yelling.

"What?" Ivan turned to him and blinked his violet eyes.

"People will stare at us." Gilbert said, "I'm not your slave or pet."

"Yeah yeah~" Ivan hummed and let go of him. Thinking for a moment and smiling to himself; Gilbert would not make the best slave, too stubborn. But pet...? Possibly; he had the type of stubbornness that could easily be tamed into something more... cute.

.

Gilbert followed Ivan down the road and people were already looking at them. Probably wondering what poor soul got sucked into Ivan's grasp now.

He kept his head down and based where he stepped by where Ivan put his own feet. He hated being stared at and now it wasn't just because of his appearance, it was him walking alongside Ivan Braginski; the man famous for rapes and murders that he didn't commit.

.

"Gilbert." Ivan said and suddenly stopped in his tracts, causing the albino to bump into his back.

"W-What?" he mumbled and looked up at him and then around him, everyone was staring at them. Jeeze, didn't they have _anything_ better to do?

"You may not be my slave or my pet, but you are looking like it." He said and then smiled, "Look a little more happy, okay?" Gilbert blinked at him, not really sure what to do. Ivan sighed, "Like this." He leaned down, grabbed Gilbert's cold red cheeks and pulled them up so he was smiling awkwardly.

"Ow ow! That hurts!" he yelled and lightly slapped the Russian's hands away from his now sore face.

Ivan laughed, "Try to smile more or else people will think you are my slave. We do not want that, now do we~" he hummed happily.

Gilbert scoffed, "No, we don't." he was angry, but he was still amused, too much so to even be really mad at him. Ivan just seemed like a child who liked to play with words too much. At least, that's what Gilbert hoped anyway.

"Good, let us go then." He suddenly grabbed Gilbert's hand and began dragging him down the street.

"H-Hey! Let go of my hand!" Gilbert yelled, blushing slightly, or maybe that was just the frost biting his face. "People are going to think weird things!"

"Oh~?" Ivan beamed and turned his head, "Weirder than you being my pet?" Ivan grinned; he was messing with him. Gilbert didn't mind joking in a flirty way with other men when he had the lead, but when it came to stuff like this he was completely defenseless, whereas Ivan enjoyed making him uncomfortable; it led to funny and even cute reactions from him. Yes, he believed he was developing a little crush on the albino. That, or it could just be that he enjoys making someone uncomfortable, especially someone who gives such prominent reactions so easily. He was getting a laugh, so either way worked for him.

However, he did think it was funny how even though Gilbert didn't want people to think strange things, he insists on screaming loudly in the middle of the street.

.

Gilbert gave in and let the man do what he wanted, even if he was embarrassed. He heard people whispering toward them and he tried to block them out, but that failed due to his own thoughts being louder and worse than what they were saying. Ivan's hand was warm, very warm. Gilbert blushed as he resisted the urge to tighten his hand, he tried so hard not to... but it just happened.

Ivan felt the albino's hand grip his just slightly. Suddenly he had no idea what to do except to keep walking; he wasn't expecting Gilbert to do such a thing. Should he grip back? Let go? Ignore it? He wasn't sure how Gilbert would react if he did any of these things.

In the end he just ignored it; Now it was he who was in an awkward spot. Was he thinking too much about it? Probably.

After all, Gilbert was just cold.

.

Ivan stopped outside the tavern they were supposed to go to and looked over at Gilbert. "Go in alone. I do not want to cause unnecessary trouble for you." Ivan knew his appearance in there might cause a problem in the future for Gilbert. Although nothing he couldn't handle right? No one would dare mess with Ivan, not with everyone being so scared of him. He could protect Gilbert regardless of what he got himself into, and Ivan firmly believed that.

Gilbert nodded in agreement and walked in through the door without him. He had to admit, he was a little scared to go in alone, but it was better than having a few idiots try to start something.

.

Everyone inside turned their heads instantly, murmuring to themselves as he walked quickly to the counter, ignoring a few of the faces that were giving him looks unlike the others. He wanted to get this over with, fast.

"Dmitrii." He called out at the familiar man.

"Gil! You are back!" he exclaimed happily and turned his body around. His eyes dropped instantly, "That coat..." he mumbled.

"Eeh?" Gilbert looked down at himself like maybe something was on him. "What about it?"

"It... it's _his_, isn't it? I recognize it... Didn't I tell you not to go there..." he mumbled.

Gilbert groaned loudly, "Dude you need to _chill_ _out_ and learn to not believe rumors so much. He said and leaned on the counter. Dmitrii gave him a worried look, "Anyway, I'm here to pick up something, a case of vodka." He said and shoved his hand into his pocket and fished out the paper Ivan gave him earlier.

"For... him?" Dmitrii asked quietly.

Gilbert groaned again, he was starting to get sick of this man's shit. "Yes." He said and put the paper on the counter so that the name would face the blonde man, "For Ivan Braginski."

You'd think he was naked with the way everyone was suddenly staring at him. He instantly noticed the effect of saying Ivan's name and grumbled to Dmitrii, "Just get me the case and I'll leave." He said while rubbing his temples; the uneasy pressure in the room was starting to give him a headache.

Dmitrii studied the paper that Gilbert had pulled from his pocket. There was no mistaking it, it was definitely Ivan's signature. "Y-Yeah, please, wait here."

.

It had to be 5 minutes, if not longer, since Dmitrii went to get his case. Shouldn't these things be easy to locate? Especially if the person ordering is Ivan, who everyone seems to fear?

Gilbert heard the door open and he turned to see who it was out of curiosity. Of course it was Ivan, smiling happily and almost skipping to meet up with him.

"What are you doing? I thought you were waiting outside for me?" Gilbert asked, ignoring all the people around them shifting uncomfortably as they recognized the nobleman.

"I was, but you are taking so long. And it is cold, I do not like cold."

Gilbert rolled his eyes, "Not my fault. I've been standing here for over 5 minutes just waiting for Dmitrii to come back with your order. Guy is _not_ gonna be happy."

"What?" Ivan blinked, "Why not?"

"Have you not noticed the looks we're getting right now?" Gilbert said quietly and leaned closer to Ivan, "Dmitrii is scared of you too."

"I see... well we shall start off on a new page then, okay?" he smiled. Gilbert just hoped Dmitrii wouldn't have a freakin' heart attack.

.

"H-Here is your order, sir." Dmitrii couldn't even make eye-contact with either of them.

"Thanks... hey, I want you to meet him." Gilbert said and Dmitrii looked up at him, "This is Ivan Braginski. He is _not_ a psycho like you all think." He explained nonchalantly. This entire thing was more of an irritation than anything.

Ivan gave Gilbert a soft look and smiled, he was happy at least _someone_ didn't think he was crazy. "It is a pleasure to meet you, Dmitrii." Ivan greeted him and offered him a hand. Dmitrii stared at the hand extended to him and then back to Gilbert. The albino was giving him a very distinct 'If you don't shake his hand, I'll _make_ you shake it' look. Dmitrii swallowed and hesitantly shook Ivan's hand, to which he relaxed a little; Ivan's grip was gentle and his smile was real.

.

"Alright, let's get out of here before it starts snowing harder." Gilbert suddenly said, looking outside to see the white flakes falling harder than before.

Ivan turned to Gilbert, having actually started a decent conversation with a still timid Dmitrii. "I suppose you are right." He turned back to the blonde man and smiled, "Once again, it was a pleasure meeting you-"

"Yeah yeah, that's enough, let's go." Gilbert groaned and grabbed Ivan's arm and literally dragged him toward the door. "See ya later, Dmitrii~!" he yelled back at him.

"G-Gilbert, what are you doing? Let go of me!" Ivan stuttered as he was dragged sideways through the front aisle of the tavern. He was utterly shocked by the German's sudden actions; no one had ever dared to do such a thing to him, and everyone around them was thinking the same thing as well.

.

Dmitrii was shocked, and a little scared for Gilbert's safety now... but, Ivan actually didn't seem like that bad of a guy, and the two of them had this weird, almost loving air around them. Dmitrii smiled a little, thinking about it.

_I guess that's why he always refused the ladies..._

.

.

"Gilbert, stop pulling me." Ivan said after being pulled down the street a fair way. He could tell something was wrong with the albino; his grip was tightening and then loosening, almost trembling. Ivan tugged on his arm and Gilbert was pulled backward, but he regained his balance and blinked at Ivan like someone had just slapped him across the face.

"Sorry... I just, wanted out of there..." he narrowed his eyes and began staring at the snowy ground.

Ivan noticed Gilbert's sudden change in attitude and, in an attempt to comfort him, placed his hand gently on his head and ruffled his hair softly. "I do not know what is wrong, but do not worry; you are under my protection now, and no harm will come to you while you are." He smiled almost lovingly, and Gilbert looked up at him, the smile and his gesture made him blush brightly and he felt his heart flutter a little.

Gilbert looked back down, not wanting Ivan to see how red his face had gotten from a few sweet words. "Thanks..." he mumbled.

Ivan removed his hand from Gilbert's head and took his hand in his once more, "Let us go home, shall we?" Gilbert blushed more and nodded at the ground. Why was Ivan being so affectionate toward him? Was he showing sympathy, or was it just pity? Gilbert wondered why he himself was so accepting of this affection; he figured it was because the man saved his life, or maybe it was just that look of kindness and comfort in Ivan's liquid violet eyes that made him feel so safe?

.

During the walk back to Ivan's huge house, Gilbert had a lot of time to think. He realized that he liked Ivan not just because of his kindness and safe words. It was just _him_. Everything about him was something that he liked: His way of speaking and him seeming to know exactly what to say. His little jokes that just picked at Gilbert's patience, but he secretly enjoyed and even welcomed the Russian's comebacks.

It was just the first day, but he felt like he could trust Ivan with his life. After all, he owed him it; it was only right to trust him with it.

.

"There was..." Gilbert mumbled quietly, secretly hoping Ivan would hear him. It was frustrating how pathetic he felt.

Ivan stopped and turned to him, "Hm? What is it?"

"In the tavern... one of my attackers, he was... I recognized him..." he squeezed his eyes shut. How could he forget that face when he grabbed his chin and mocked him, and laughed psychotically in his face?

Ivan picked up on his discomfort, "I see... it is good that I came in when I did. You will not run errands for me alone anymore; I will be with you every time you go out."

"You don't have to..." Gilbert mumbled, hoping to regain even the slightest bit of pride.

Ivan chuckled, "No, I do not, but we have gone over this before, right? I _want_ to." He gave Gilbert that look again; that one that made his heart flutter and his face heat up. Why was it so easy for him to make him feel like this? Was it wrong? He blamed it on the fact that Ivan was so openly affectionate toward him.

.

Ivan began to walk again and gripped Gilbert's hand tightly. The albino smiled slightly and held back tighter. He really did not want to let go.

* * *

Welp, there ya go. I promised this chapter would be longer and I delivered. I just hope the contents were okay enough for you guys ^^'

I'm always looking for feedback~ I wanna know what you guys think as the story goes on :)

**.**

**Author's Notes: **

-Plot-hole fill-in!: Gilbert's cross was ripped off his neck during the attack on him, but Ivan found it laying next to him and assumed it was his and fixed it during the night while Gilbert was sleeping and put it back on him, which is how it's around his neck now... yeah, I'm _horrible_ with plot-holes xD sorry about that~

-Awh that's nice, you get to see a crappy background story I made up for Gilbert and Ludwig... it's an AU, so it works... right? *Looks away awkwardly while whistling*

-Gilbert sounds like he has a boot fetish, he's so excited over them-*isshot*

-Ivan is a bit... strange... he pretty much knows he has a thing for Gilbert, which is why he messes with him so much about awkward things... I think Ivan wants Gilbert to be his pet xD *isshotagain*

-Soooo... Gilbert is starting to realize his little "crush" on Ivan now... oh boy. Though, they both seem to be taking these realizations of their feelings quite well. I suppose with the trauma that's happened in prior chapters, it kind of mentally broke Gilbert and now he's seeking comfort subconsciously and doesn't even realize it. And Ivan, well... he has his own story for liking or silver-haired friend...


	8. Inebriated

I could foreshadow some things for you right here about this chapter, but I feel like this is one for you to just read without any comments from me until the end. So hopefully you'll enjoy this chapter if you've been enjoying this story so far :)

Enjoy, and I'll see you at the end~

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**WARNINGS:** Sensitive concepts/topics, swearing, use of alcohol, weird stuff, etc...

Edited: November 9th, 2012

* * *

**~3 days later, January 15th, 2013~  
**[[ Dat time lapse- *isshot* ]]

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The morning sun beamed into Gilbert's room brightly. The rays beating on his eyelids woke him from his slumber and he opened his ruby eyes to his familiar room. He sat up and pushed the heavy blanket off of himself, revealing his bare and bandaged chest; the skin around the wound tightened slightly and he placed his hand on his torso and gently poked at himself. It didn't hurt anymore; he guessed it had healed up, if only a little. He knew it was too soon for it to be completely healed; Besides, Ivan said it would leave a scar.

.

He got up and found his pile of clothing that he refused to put in one of the dressers in his room, pulled on a pair of black pants that were pretty tight and another white button-up shirt. When he felt cocky, which was often, he liked to describe himself as a classy punk; he looked nice, but his attitude wasn't always as desirable. Yes, he knew he could be a brat sometimes.

Sometimes... only sometimes.

.

He started his trip to the kitchen and walked downstairs. He wasn't really sure what he was supposed to do; he works for Ivan now, but the man never gave him any instructions even after three days. Even if he was still recovering from injuries, he should be doing _something_ beneficial to Ivan, right?

He walked through the door-less frame of the kitchen and froze in his tracks at the strange sight in front of him. Ivan was sitting at the counter that Gilbert and Sofia were sitting at yesterday.

"Oh, hello Gilbert, good morning." Ivan smiled warmly at him.

Gilbert blinked, feeling a mix between terror and speechlessness, "Are you... drinking?" Gilbert asked while staring at the vodka bottle in Ivan's hands. It couldn't be far after noon, what is he thinking drinking this early?

"Yes~" he hummed and brought the clear bottle to his lips, tilting his head back to allow the alcohol to run down his throat.

Gilbert groaned at the sight. _This _is where the stereotypes came from. He admitted he loved beer and even vodka, but Ivan was chugging it like it was a life force or something. The loud gulps coming from Ivan's throat were almost enough to make Gilbert cringe. "Y'know, that's probably not healthy..."

"I know..." he sat the bottle on the glossy black top of the counter, "I should have told you before, but I have a bit of a problem with vodka..." his eyes narrowed a bit. He already hated where this was going, he was going to have to explain something, wasn't he?

_A bit of a problem? _Gilbert asked in his head; it seemed more than just 'a bit.'

"Ever try to stop?" Gilbert asked. He wondered what happened to the cheerful Russian he was yesterday. Gilbert missed him; this new, depressed Ivan didn't seem like any fun at all.

"Can't." he grumbled, "It is a long, complicated story..."

Gilbert sat next to him, "I've got time."

Ivan shifted uncomfortably in his chair, "Gilbert..."

"Ivan." Gilbert mimicked him with his own name, giving him a childish smile and a small glare.

Ivan appreciated his interest and the small traces of concern in his features. He sighed heavily, "Very well, I will tell; but I will blame you if I end up drunk by the end of my story."

Gilbert laughed lightly, "I will gladly take that blame." a friendly smile on his face.

.

Ivan gathered two glasses from a nearby cupboard and poured both Gilbert and himself a full glass of vodka. It had been a while since he had a drinking partner; it was a nice feeling to have someone to drink with again.

"Thanks." Gilbert thanked him and took a sip of the alcohol. He was accustomed to the taste of vodka by now and actually enjoyed it, though he would probably always love beer more. "Now, your story?" he asked, making sure that Ivan didn't try to wiggle his way out of telling.

"Yes... it is not such a long tale as I thought. It is a similar one of you and your cross." He explained.

"My cross?" Gilbert asked curiously, poking at said cross through his shirt.

"It is a reminder of your father, right? Vodka is my reminder of my own." Ivan explained further.

"How does vodka remind you of your dad?" As the words left his mouth, he instantly regretted saying them. Some drunks are violent; Ivan could have bad memories.

"He was able to hold his liquor very well." Ivan said. Gilbert raised an eyebrow at him. He didn't understand why that was a reason to drink so much.

Ivan took another large swig of his drink, draining the liquid to about half. He stared down his glass with narrowed eyes and watched the clear liquid ripple against the walls of the goblet. "I am going to be straight with you. I watched my father's murder."

...

Sadness with undertones of guilt seeped into Gilbert's features. The look on Ivan's face was tragically devastating to see. Gilbert hated the look and tried to distract himself by chugging his entire glass of vodka in a few gulps.

Ivan stared at him, partially not believing what he just saw. His face lightened and he smiled a little, and then poured the albino another glass. Perhaps it would not be he who would be getting drunk today. Maybe it was better this way; he didn't want to explain his past to Gilbert so soon, not after just meeting him and getting so close so quickly.

.

A few minutes passed since Gilbert had finished his first glass, "Your father... was killed?" he mumbled. The vodka was settling in now; he was starting to feel warm, and a little hazy.

"Yes..." Ivan said. He wasn't really hurt by the fact that his father was gone, it happened so long ago that it didn't upset him anymore; his days of breaking into tears and starving himself for days over it are gone. Now he just gave remembrance to his father by thoroughly enjoying his old man's drink of choice, which quickly became his own favorite thing to consume. However, he owed most of his current composure to the drunken albino man next to him. There was just something about him that comforted the Russian when he was around. Something warm.

"Ah... I'm sorry..." Gilbert said with hazed eyes, "Mine too..." Ivan already knew this, Gilbert told him but he obviously didn't remember that at the moment. Ivan studied his face, his pale cheeks had a light tint of pink and his eyes were hazed over. His second glass of vodka was gone and he was only getting worse. To some extent, he wished Gilbert had told him that he couldn't hold his liquor very well.

Suddenly, Gilbert stood to his feet and shakily placed his hand on Ivan's shoulder. "Gilbert?" Ivan questioned and looked up at the man; he swayed from side-to-side and seemed to have a bit of trouble balancing.

"I know... how it feels to lose your father..." he mumbled.

"Gilbert you are drunk, sit down." He told him and grabbed the hand on his shoulder. The albino shook his head defiantly and leaned down, pressing his head into Ivan's to support himself.

"Gilbert?" Ivan said his name again, confused by his actions. The German didn't say anything, his hand came up to Ivan's cheek and gently pulled his face closer, placing a tender kiss on the Russian's cheek and letting his lips linger on the skin for a few seconds.

Ivan's mind went blank. He wasn't shocked or appalled, just... utterly confused. After a few seconds, Gilbert moved back from Ivan and looked at him; he had an even redder streak across his face.

"Gilbert... you... why... what...?" Ivan mumbled incoherently. His thoughts were, for once, in a jumble. He suddenly found himself wanting something, something he didn't think he would want, at least, not this soon. Gilbert's lips gave him a feeling of comfort that he always longed for. Gilbert himself gave this feeling by just being there. It was something that Ivan didn't quite understand and honestly, he didn't really care to understand it, he just knew what he wanted and that was enough.

.

Not being able to resist or fight back his personal demons, he stood to his feet and pressed his lips to Gilbert's softly before he even reached his full height about 2 inches above the albino, basically grabbing his lips as he went up.

Gilbert's eyes slid shut instantly and he made a small squeak. However, the sound was like thunder in Ivan's ears and he broke the kiss immediately, which left the German trailing after him slightly and looking somewhat disappointed.

"You need to go back to sleep." Ivan said and grabbed Gilbert's hand, leading him back upstairs to his room. Gilbert didn't protest to being dragged away, his mind was a haze of vodka and slight excitement.

Ivan was extremely mad, not at Gilbert but at himself. He hid it well, but he couldn't believe he did that. How could he let himself loose control so easily!?

.

Ivan pushed the door to Gilbert's bedroom open, dragged the small albino and practically threw him onto the bed, "You will sleep and not leave this room until I come get you." Ivan knew it was pointless to tell a drunken man something and then expect him to remember when he wakes up; especially since this was Gilbert he was talking to.

Still, he forced the German to lay down, pulled a blanket over him and tucked him in quickly. Gilbert blinked at him in confusion, feeling almost like a child who had been scared by something. What exactly _did_ he do that upset Ivan so much? His mind was so hazed that he couldn't even find words to say, he just watched as Ivan treated him like a scared child before rushing off.

.

Ivan left him there and went back to his room after retrieving a full bottle of vodka from the kitchen.

Setting himself down heavily in his soft cushioned chair, all he could think about was that cute look on Gilbert's face; blushing with his eyes hazed over, and the feeling of his lips on his own, there was a faint taste of vodka on Gilbert's lips, just thinking about that made Ivan blush a little.

Ivan could tell that the albino was dehydrated; his lips were dry and cracked, yet somehow still soft. He told himself that he would cook a decent meal for him later, and make him drink a lot of water. Something told him that Gilbert is _not_ the type to properly take care of himself.

Then again, neither was Ivan, considering it has been days since he's had a proper meal and he's been drinking nothing but vodka as well.

.

He laid his head on his desk and closed his eyes. He still couldn't get the image of Gilbert out of his mind, or the fact that it seems like the albino is very different when drunk; submissive and a bit more... touchy.

He could still feel his lips tingling. Of course, that's not physically possible, however his mind made it easy to imagine. He really hated being a victim to his own imagination; he knew he couldn't win against it.

.

Later he woke up with a sore neck and back. He had accidentally fallen asleep on his desk and now he was in a bit of discomfort. He glanced up at the clock; it was around 5pm now.

He stood up and the realization of previous events settled in.

He only hoped Gilbert was still asleep...

* * *

Soo... drunken Gilly is cute~

I'm always looking for feedback~ I wanna know what you guys think as the story goes on :)

.

**Author's Notes:**

-Some of you guys who are keeping up with this story and reviewing it have been wanting some more romance to happen, so I quickened my pace a little bit and hopefully delivered well enough. **  
**

-Yes, Ivan's plan was to get Gilbert drunk so he didn't have to tell him his story. What a lovely man, hm? Nah, but it all worked out for the better, right?

-I'm also aware that Gilbert is quite the uke when drunk, but I just see him as becoming a big softy when inebriated, as well as in romantic situations.

-Plot-hole filler #1: Gilbert's mother used to kiss West and him on the cheek whenever they were sad, hurt or upset, which is a reason why he kissed Ivan to begin with; memories of his mother drove him to do it. However, he probably would not have done it if he were sober.

-Plot-hole filler #2: When Ivan is back in his room, he hints that Gilbert has not been eating or drinking properly. This is because in Ivan's house, neither he nor his sisters cook daily meals for themselves; they usually just find whatever to eat at whatever time they're hungry, a family dinner is rare for them. Because of this, Gilbert usually just eats small things here and there, not wanting to eat more than he feels he should, when in reality he's eating less than his body requires to stay healthy.

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(Posted: 10.9.2012)


	9. Realization

Like last chapter, I'll just let you read and I'll comment at the end. Enjoy~

.

**WARNINGS:** Sensitive concepts/topics, swearing, use of alcohol, weird stuff, etc...

Edited: November 9th 2012

* * *

**~January 15th, 2013~**

.

Ivan was beginning to hate the effect Gilbert has on his mind and actions. It was starting to get a little ridiculous:

He stood outside Gilbert's room, nervous to go in. He was not nervous because he was embarrassed, no; Ivan wouldn't be so affected by a little kiss. The problem lied with whether Gilbert was okay with it or not, if they could both look past that little event, then Ivan would be fine. In the end, he was just worried about Gilbert and how he felt about it.

.

Ivan opened the door slowly and immediately regretted it and wanted nothing more to go back the way he came. Gilbert was sitting up against the headboard of his bed, his hands tucked behind his head and his eyes just _glaring_ toward the door, which is to say, he was now glaring at Ivan.

"_So_." Gilbert huffed angrily, "You think you can just get me drunk, kiss me, and then lock me in my room until you feel like letting me out?"

_What...?_ Ivan couldn't think, his thoughts were going haywire, "I-I'm sorry." was all he could properly say to him at the moment. Gilbert obviously remembered everything. Though it was stupid to assume that he wouldn't.

"Damn right you're sorry, I'm fucking starving!" he complained loudly, "My stomach feels like it's eating itself!" he jumped off of his bed and walked to Ivan, glaring up at him with small hints of amusement on his face. "Can we eat now, or am I still _grounded_?" He asked teasingly.

Luckily Ivan picked up on Gilbert's sarcasm; his voice was only _dripping_ with it. He laughed lightly, "Yes, we can. However, I must decide your punishment~" he jabbed back, relieved that Gilbert seemed okay.

"Whaaat? What did _I_ do? Wasn't it _you _who kissed _me?" _Gilbert smirked.

Ivan shrugged and smiled childishly, "You started it by kissing my cheek."

"I was comforting you!" Gilbert yelled, punching Ivan in the arm slightly, still joking with him.

"Oh~? So you _were_ conscious of your actions?" the taller man grinned, "How cute~" his voice was dangerously sweet.

Gilbert blushed slightly; he didn't even realize how easily he had walked into that one, and suddenly his 'cool' mocking demeanor was gone. "It's not like I _wanted_ to kiss you!" He yelled, "You just looked so pathetic and sad so I just- I just... uh..." his mind went blank; he didn't have a good argument at all. He hated when he basically set himself up for defeat. He didn't have a good reason for not wanting to kiss him, because secretly he _did_ want to, and he knew it. He also hated that as well, but probably for a different reason than one would think.

Ivan smiled warmly at him and pulled him into a tight hug, "Thank you." He mumbled quietly.

Gilbert's face reddened more as he felt Ivan's body warming him. "Wh-Why are you thanking me...?"

The albino squeaked lightly when Ivan's strong arms tightened around him, followed by warm breath on his neck. "You comforted me..." Ivan mumbled, "No one ever attempts to, besides Sofia..."

Gilbert stood there with his body almost limp in Ivan's embrace. "Is... she not good at comforting you?" he asked sadly.

"No, it is not like that..." he said, "She is my sister and I love her, but... she cannot cure me of certain solitudes..." he gently pressed his cold lips to Gilbert's neck as an indication of what he meant by his words. A shiver ran down Gilbert's spine and he squeezed his eyes shut tight, he couldn't react much at all. He knew instantly what Ivan was talking about, and he was a little scared. Was he supposed to cure Ivan of his loneliness?

.

Realistically, that wouldn't be so bad for either of them; they were both lonely and they obviously had a special connection that neither of them really understood. They just knew that it was there and it was getting stronger almost by the minute.

.

"I am sorry Gilbert, but I do not feel like letting go yet." Ivan confessed and squeezed the smaller man tightly, pressing his face into the albino's neck.

Gilbert tried to shift his body but failed, and he sighed lightly, "I don't mind, b-but... it hurts... my chest..." Gilbert felt his eyes beginning to water; he hoped his wound didn't open.

The Russian stuttered over a cute apology and released the pale man enough to look down at him, "You are not bothered by this?" He asked with one of the cutest expressions Gilbert has ever seen.

The silver-haired man broke eye-contact, feeling his cheeks warm up again just as soon as they cooled down. "I said it's fine!" He said loudly, "I owe you my life, remember? This is the least I can do..." his voice quieted, feeling embarrassed that those words just left his mouth, and how true they were.

_What am I saying...?_ He thought to himself.

.

Suddenly a gloved finger slid along Gilbert's jaw line and effortlessly brought his ruby irises up to meet Ivan's violet ones; The Russian leaned down and pressed his lips to his softly and he braced himself for a violent reaction from the albino, but all Gilbert could do was stand there with his eyes open wide at the man kissing him.

So this was what it felt like... he remembered having the first kiss but not how it felt.

He liked it. He liked it a lot.

.

What felt like a small shock to Ivan's body was triggered by the feeling of Gilbert's lips trembling to move against his own, "Gilbert I am sorry, I did not mean to..." Ivan muttered, his eyebrows furrowed and his face fell with sadness.

"Forget about it, it's alright..." Gilbert mumbled quietly.

"I am sorry-"

"I said it's alright!" Gilbert snapped, "I wouldn't have, k-kissed back, if it wasn't!" his voice cracked a little and his face was bright red.

Ivan stood there in shock; he wasn't expecting Gilbert to be so open and accepting of his own actions toward himelf. It wasn't everyday that a man could hold and kiss another man, especially a near stranger, without getting slapped or punched.

"Is this... normal for you?" Ivan asked hesitantly.

Gilbert blushed, "N-No..." The reality of what this all meant didn't hit him until just now. He never pegged himself as gay, or Ivan for that matter, but now that it was all laid out in front of him, it hit him like a brick... he wondered, did Ivan know? Could he tell that Gilbert liked him? What did he think of his actions toward him? Did he feel the same, or was he just overly friendly with everyone?

So many questions flooded Gilbert's mind and it made him a little dizzy.

.

Suddenly Ivan held him close again, "I have changed my mind about something. He whispered to him. Gilbert wiggled a little in the tight grip Ivan had on him. "You will not be my servant, but you will stay as a guest."

The smaller man pushed away from him, clearly having a problem with this, "W-Wait! I won't have money! If I'm not working, I can't pay for-" Ivan hushed him with a sudden kiss on the lips, to which, much to Ivan's dismay, Gilbert pushed away again. "Stop that!" He yelled at the Russian, who was still holding him tight at the waist.

Ivan looked a bit hurt by his rejection, "I thought you said it was fine..." he mumbled.

"The _first_ time, yeah! But we're not a couple or something! You can't just do whatever you want to me because I'm here!" Gilbert explained uncomfortably, he was fairly sure he just hinted at wanting to date him. More terrifying than that, the tiny glint that lit in Ivan's eyes was slightly unsettling.

"So..." Ivan grinned, pulling the albino closer and looking deep into his eyes, "If we are dating, then I can do what I want with you?"

Gilbert's eyes were wide in terrified bewilderment. Ivan was one of those guys that gets weirder and weirder the more you knew about him. "That's... not what I..."

"Then you are saying you wish to date me?" Ivan guessed as he stared down at the blushing man.

Gilbert looked away from him, he wasn't sure what he wanted, he knew he liked Ivan but part of him resented that fact. What would people say about them? ... what would West think about his big brother being gay? He doubted Ludwig would be bothered by it, but suddenly finding out because of some strange man Gilbert has known less than a week? It's a little off-putting.

.

Ivan made Gilbert look at him again, his heart breaking a little from the sad rapt look on Gilbert's face. "I will not force you, but..."

"But?" Gilbert asked eagerly, damning himself for opening his mouth. He hated not having control over what he said or did; his self-control sunk to an all-time-low when he was around Ivan, which was something he hated more.

"I want you to." Ivan said simply. Ivan knew it was weird; it's only been four days but he knew his feelings for Gilbert would only increase if he stayed; not that he really minded, but Ivan wasn't going to let him leave that easily. He got attached to things rather easily, be it a pet or a person. They were practically the same thing to him.

"You want me, to date you?" Gilbert asked, blinking his eyes a few times.

Ivan shrugged, "I want you to stay." He was avoiding the question. In truth, he just wanted Gilbert. That's it, just him. It didn't matter if he stayed as a servant or as his boyfriend or as a pet. He just wanted to have Gilbert around him. Although he did enjoy holding and hugging him, even dragging him by the hand. Oh, and the kisses were good too. Ivan would still continue to be affectionate toward him regardless, which is why it didn't matter to him what Gilbert would be if he stayed.

Ivan had no problem admitting this to himself and, if asked, he would shamelessly admit it to Gilbert as well.

"Uh... I never said I was leaving." Gilbert said still looking up at the seemingly worried Russian.

Suddenly Gilbert was pulled into Ivan. "Good~" The purple eyed man hummed happily.

"Did you forget that I have no where else to go?" Gilbert teased a little, "This is the only place I have right-"

"No, I don't want you to stay because you have to, but because you want to..." Ivan interrupted mumbling.

Gilbert pouted, "I do want to stay. I mean, I _could_ leave, but I'm not too excited about the idea of living on the street considering what happened to me just walking around..."

Ivan laughed lightly at him, "I would not let you live on the streets anyway, I would force you to stay if you tried to do that. However, if you go back to Ludwig, then I have no problem with that." That was a lie; he didn't want to lose Gilbert, not even to the man's own brother. But he had to appear unselfish even if he was very protective, perhaps even possessive, over Gilbert. Ivan was just starting to fully realize the extent of his concern he felt for the German.

.

"Still though..." Gilbert started, still awkwardly standing between Ivan and his strong arms. The Russian looked down at him, "Even if I could go back to West, I might not be as happy." Ivan watched him and stroked his back gently, silently urging him to continue, "This Italian guy lives with him now and even before I left two years ago they were really good friends, I think West may like him." Gilbert smiled a little, he was fairly sure that Ludwig loves Feliciano. "I don't want to be a third wheel..."

Ivan chuckled lightly, "And you are happy enough here already to make the decision not to go back?" he poked at him playfully, but secretly really wanting to know.

Once again Gilbert had set himself up so perfectly for Ivan to pick his words apart and choose what he wanted to hear and comment on. "I won't leave yet, not until I've repaid you for saving me." He said, fully ignoring Ivan's question.

Though slightly disappointed for not getting a proper answer from him, Ivan blinked in bewilderment at the albino and then smiled softly. "Then be with me as 'payment'. Maybe I will even make you fall in love with me and you won't leave at all~" his smile turned into more of a playful grin accompanied by a few quiet mutters, possibly something in Russian, Gilbert didn't really know. He also had no idea how serious Ivan was when he said that.

"Yeah yeah~" Gilbert hummed, "Whatever~"

"So then, you are mine?" Ivan asked, his childish grin gone and replaced with a dead serious gaze. Gilbert looked him straight in the eye, it was hard to look anywhere else, and his heart began pounding against his ribcage. Was this _that_ important to Ivan? Just to call him his own?

The albino nodded slowly, "Yeah... I guess..." he managed to look away from the Russian. Although Gilbert didn't know how possessive Ivan was over him, he felt strange saying that, it felt weird saying that he belonged to someone.

.

Ivan's lips pulled into a bright smile; it had been so long since he last smiled with such happiness. He leaned down and gently pressed his lips against the corner of Gilbert's mouth, moving his lips along the outline of the albino's. A small whine escaped from Gilbert's mouth and Ivan grinned, "So cute..." he mumbled as he continued to teasingly caress the frame of Gilbert's lips. "Rabbit... my Rabbit..." he whispered softly, his warm breath flooding out over Gilbert's heated face.

Gilbert turned his head to look at him, "What?" He couldn't help himself from blushing when Ivan's gorgeous violet eyes fluttered up to meet with his crimson ones.

Ivan smiled lovingly at him, "You are my Rabbit." He said simply as if expecting Gilbert to understand. "The day we met, I said that you remind me of a rabbit, so that is now your nickname." He smiled. Gilbert groaned slightly and tried to ignore the cute little smile that Ivan had hovering centimeters above his lips. "However..." the Russian started again, "No one else is allowed to call you 'Rabbit', only I am." He kissed Gilbert's cheek gently.

"Great, not even dating for five minutes and already with the pet names..."

Ivan gripped Gilbert's chin and kissed him suddenly, completely disregarding the albino's comment. He resisted the urge to deepen the kiss. After all, he didn't know his Rabbit's limits, only that he was inexperienced. A darker side of him admitted that he was looking forward to pushing the German's boundaries; he was curious as to just what he could get away with and what Gilbert would willingly let him do.

"So you want to be my pet?" Ivan mocked him.

"_You_ gave me the nickname! I'm not the one who compared me to a little bunny!" Gilbert retorted.

Ivan laughed. He was beginning to enjoy the frustration Gilbert was showing. "So you want me to call you 'Bunny' instead?"

"No! What is wrong with you!? Where did you even _get_ that from!?" Gilbert pushed on Ivan's chest but to no avail; the Russian was a lot stronger than he looked and a hell of a lot stronger than Gilbert.

"You're just so adorable~!" The Russian exclaimed and began planting kisses up the side of Gilbert's face along his jaw line. Gilbert wiggled persistently, trying to avoid Ivan's mouth but just increasing the randomness of where his lips were placed. Not only was he annoyed by the loving attack, he was also enjoying it a little too much.

.

He continued to writhe in Ivan's affectionate assault until the Russian's lips connected with his ear. Gilbert froze instantly and face turned an entire different, darker shade of red, and a strange warmth filled the pit of his stomach for a brief second before fading.

"D-Don't, do that..." he whined quietly, confused on what the hell just happened.

Ivan felt him tense up suddenly and he held him close, looking down at him. "Do not do what?"

Gilbert looked away, "My ears..." he mumbled, embarrassed.

Ivan thought for a few seconds, his face changing from confused and curious to dangerously amused. "I see~ So you liked them touched?"

Gilbert twitched and looked back at him, "How did you get that from what I- Aah!" Ivan's tongue slid up the rim of Gilbert's ear suddenly, cutting the albino's sentence off and causing that cute little gasp to escape from his mouth. Gilbert clasped one of his hands over his ear, "I said not to!" he yelled, his voice a little shaky.

"Yes~? But why? Your body seems to like it~" Ivan commented, rubbing one of Gilbert's red cheeks gently with a gloved thumb.

The albino flinched away from him, he wasn't ready to be touched yet, it's not like they should have a physical relationship anyway, they just started dating and Gilbert was still not completely accepting of that fact; it just felt strange to him.

Ivan watched his pet carefully. He noticed a discomfort that was almost painful on Gilbert's red face, "Gilbert... I am sorry..." he laid his head on his shoulder, his dusty blonde locks tickling Gilbert's neck, and his hands began rubbing up and down his back soothingly. He didn't mean to break a barrier so soon; he just wanted to show some affection, maybe a bit of teasing too, but he lost his control a little. In the end, he just wanted to erase some of the tainted touch from Gilbert's skin. The albino didn't know how much it bothered Ivan that his once clean, pure and innocent skin had been violated by complete strangers, and was now broken, bruised and scarred.

.

Gilbert shifted his eyes to look at the Russian's head on his shoulder. He brought his arms up around his back; his body was large and he could easily be compared to a bear, he's strong and big, and people were afraid of him while he feared them more.

Gilbert hugged him tightly. "It's... alright..." he mumbled quietly.

Ivan snuggled into him, clinging like a newborn baby to its mother. He discovered how forgiving of a man Gilbert is; even after all that's happened to him, it was Gilbert who was comforting Ivan when it should be the other way around. Gilbert had no obligation to care for or comfort Ivan like he had been doing. Or maybe he did and Ivan just didn't realize it.

.

Gilbert's stomach suddenly growled loudly and Ivan felt the vibration on his own stomach and pulled away. Gilbert looked aside, feeling extremely embarrassed for no reason while Ivan chuckled lightly.

"You are hungry~" Ivan hummed and poked the albino's stomach. The jab caused him to flinch a little. _He's ticklish..._ was Ivan's first thought, which was indeed true; Gilbert's skin was rather sensitive, but only he himself knew that.

Well, until now.

"Yeah..." Gilbert mumbled quietly, trying to ignore that glint in Ivan's eyes.

Ivan smirked, "Let's get you some food then, shall we? Believe it or not, I am an excellent cook." Ivan said, feeling almost proud of himself.

"Haa~ That's not what Sofia said the other day." Gilbert smirked.

"What? You spoke with her of this?" Ivan asked. He was a little worried; Sofia tended to ramble sometimes, and she could tell _so_ many embarrassing stories about her younger brother.

"Yep, told me you almost burned the house down. So hopefully you _can_ cook now." Gilbert told him, remembering Sofia's outburst in the kitchen about the exact topic.

Ivan laughed lightly, relieved that Sofia may not have told him other stories. "I promise, I have enough cooking experience now that I will not burn anything, be it the food or my home."

Gilbert smiled and his stomach growled again and he hugged around his midsection, blushing again and looking away.

Ivan smiled sweetly; he found the albino's reactions quite adorable. "Come on, you need food before you pass out." He said and gripped one of his Rabbit's hands and led him out of his room.

.

_It will be nice to cook for someone again..._ Ivan smiled as he thought this to himself, feeling Gilbert's hand shyly tighten around his own.

That felt nice as well.

* * *

Well that's chapter 9 :D Hope you liked it~

I'm always looking for feedback~ I wanna know what you guys think as the story goes on :)

.

**Author's Notes:**

-Again, I'm moving quicker now because I want to write some cute fluff between Ivan and Gil, like _really_ bad. I've been dying to but they're just taking their sweet time... even though _I'm_ the one who wrote it-*isshot*

-Gilbert is surprisingly okay with his realization of being gay. I suppose he understands how he's been feeling lately and sees no point in trying to fight it.

-I really love writing Ivan in a way that makes him seem very possessive and needy; I feel like he's just a loveable bear who wants to cuddle with something, regardless of if it's a human or an animal and if the creature fully consents or not.

-Ivan hasn't fully shown his true feelings yet; Gilbert is more aware of his romantic feelings for Ivan than the latter. However, Ivan is more open and touchy with Gilbert and feels a deep need to be as close as possible with him, but not technically because of lust or need.

-Ludwig does not "love" Feliciano like Gilbert thinks. He cares about him, yes, but not in a romantic way. Just clearing that up, because Gilbert is just assuming things.

-*Giggles* I bet Ivan would call Gilbert his 'Bunny' ... if they were in a more _romantic_ situation :3 *isshot again*

-Sometimes I feel like I'll lose control when writing Ivan's actions... it's so easy to just let him do what he wants; but if I did that, this fic would go MA _real_ quick.

-No, I have not forgotten about Natalia; she'll show up again, I promise.

.

[Posted: 10.9.2012]


	10. Lights Out

Can someone say "sexual tension"!? :D *isshot*  
Oh, and there's _tons_ of fluff too. This chapter is _way_ too long, and I personally hate it. It feels too desperate. So I apologize for that.

I suppose the only thing of worth in the chapter is that you get to see how much Ivan really cares for Gilbert and how bad he wants to make him forget what happened to him.

.

**WARNINGS:** Sensitive concepts/topics, swearing, use of alcohol, overload of cuteness, weird stuff, etc...

Edited: November 9th, 2012

* * *

**~January 17th, 2013 | Around 2:30am~**

.

Gilbert was one of those people who hated silence; he couldn't sleep unless he had a fan or air conditioner going. He also hated complete darkness as well.

.

He was in a deep sleep; his chest rose and fell in sync with his faint breathing. A dim yellow light emitted and washed over his pale face from the small table lamp on his nightstand next to his bed, and a low hum droned from the standing fan nearby.

This was how he had to sleep; he didn't want to admit it as fear for egotistical reasons, but he knew it was just that. Of course, no one else had to know.

.

A storm had rolled in over Moscow and it was getting worse by the minute; it was knocking the power out in several areas. A loud crash of thunder followed a bright flash of lightening caused Gilbert to stir in his sleep, not quite waking him.

Suddenly all power to Ivan's house was cut off. The lamp and fan next to Gilbert made a popping sound as the electricity was abruptly cut from them.

The pop woke Gilbert completely. He opened his eyes to the darkness that now filled his room and sat up, letting the warm blanket fall off of his naked chest and looking around and wondering why it was so dark and so quiet.

Another flash of white light lit his room for a brief second and he realized it was storming.

"Great... power's out..." he grumbled angrily.

.

He laid back down and attempted to go back to sleep.

He failed; laying there for another hour with no luck; just turning over multiple times. He seemed to actually wake up the longer he laid there.

He groaned loudly and threw himself off of his large bed, slightly losing his balance from the lack of vision. He rummaged through his nightstand to find a small pocket flashlight and then carefully made his way to the door guided by a tiny beam of white light from the device; even the hall felt like a dark, never-ending corridor.

Probably because it is. Aside from the never-ending part.

.

Gilbert didn't know what he was thinking when he thought that going to Ivan's room was a good idea. Nevertheless, he found himself outside Ivan's bedroom door, rubbing his neck awkwardly and waiting for his nerves to calm down. Even if they are technically dating, Gilbert still felt weird referring and even acknowledging Ivan as his boyfriend. Couples were supposed to be with each other, right? ... but was it alright to be together _all_ the time? Was it okay for him to cling to Ivan like this?

He didn't like the idea of becoming one of those 'clingy girlfriends'.

.

He turned his small light off before he pushed Ivan's door open just enough to slide his body between the frame and the entrance and closed it quietly behind him.

He couldn't exactly remember the layout of Ivan's room, so he wandered around feeling for anything. Unfortunately he clipped the edge of Ivan's bed with his leg, causing him to topple over onto the bed. He groaned a little, and then froze when he felt the bed shift.

"Gilbert? Is that you...?" Ivan's voice was a little raspy from sleep.

Gilbert bit his lip and mumbled a little, then the bed moved again and a warm hand suddenly gripped his arm and pulled him in some direction. He was dragged on top of Ivan, sliding slightly between his legs, and the knowledge that the Russian was also shirtless suddenly hit him as his hands gripped for anything in reaction to being pulled forward, which just happened to be Ivan's bare chest.

"Wh-What are you doing!?" Gilbert exclaimed in a panic, losing any amount of composure he may have had.

Ivan smiled and hugged the now blushing albino tightly. "Cuddling~" he hummed happily and held Gilbert against him.

The German blushed darker, not used to such blatant skin-to-skin contact, and pushed against him, "This is uncomfortable!"

"Awh... but you're so cute~"

"Just let me move a little!" Gilbert shouted, still pushing on Ivan's chest.

The Russian's face became annoyed; Gilbert didn't seem to understand his position at the moment. Ivan sat up, bringing Gilbert into a sitting position as well, the albino's legs on both of his sides. "You know..." Ivan breathed out, his voice raspy and a lit darker sounding. "You should really learn to cooperate a little better..." he wrapped his arms around Gilbert's waist and pulled him forward, lodging his body between the albino's legs so that their torsos were nearly touching.

Gilbert's reaction was less violent and more adorably shy than expected: he winced slightly and a small hiss escaped his mouth, his eyes closed tight with little tears forming at them, and his face was red and he grit his teeth firmly.

Ivan had to push his black side back when he heard the little sound come from his Rabbit. "I'm sorry, did that hurt?" he asked.

Gilbert growled a little, "Of course it hurt, idiot! You can't just rip my legs open like that so suddenly!"

Ivan smiled, thinking 'yes, I can' to himself secretly. "I said I was sorry~" he cooed and hugged him gently, ignoring his smug thoughts.

Gilbert squeezed his eyes shut tighter, the feeling of Ivan's skin pressed against his was making his heart beat faster, which was bad; it was making him warmer. "That doesn't change the fact that you did it!" he yelled, trying to still sound angry, and wrapped both of his hands around Ivan's neck lightly.

Ivan stiffened and tightened his grip on the albino, "Gilbert, don't..." he mumbled, feeling his face redden ever-so slightly and rested his head on Gilbert's shoulder, breathing out a soft sigh.

"Hm? What's wrong?" Gilbert asked and let go of him, letting his arms fall to his sides. "Did I hurt you? I didn't even grab that hard."

Ivan sighed in relief when Gilbert's hands left him, "It would have been better, had you actually hurt me..." his voice was shaky and he moved his body away from the albino a little but not releasing him fully.

"What?" Gilbert asked with a raised eyebrow, "Are you a sadist or something? I'm not into that S&M stuff-"

"No!" Ivan raised his voice a little; he was a little shocked that Gilbert would even suggest such a thing. "That's not it... it's just..." he mumbled off.

"What? Just what?"

"My neck... is very, sensitive..." Ivan blushed slightly and let go of Gilbert.

It took a second for Gilbert to realize what Ivan was saying. "Oh... sorry... I didn't mean to, um..." he wasn't sure what to say or do; he just accidentally turned his boyfriend on by trying to strangle him a little. Something you don't do everyday.

"N-No... I don't mind, if it's you..." Ivan admitted shyly.

Gilbert watched him for a second; he had never heard Ivan sound this way, then again, there was never a chance to see this side of him, Gilbert didn't make an effort to make him like this, he wasn't really concerned with _that_. Ivan always seemed to be the leader when it came to the, well... physical side of their relationship. Probably because Gilbert was a virgin, not counting the event a few days ago. He never had time to think about dating or romance, he always had to take care of his brother and his mother. So in the end, he didn't know what to do when it came to touching someone, in any way.

It was a bit strange to see Ivan act almost submissive.

.

"It's weird to see you like this... normally you're so composed..." Gilbert mumbled.

"Yes, I am..." Ivan agreed, "This does not happen often for me, you understand... but please, do not think that I do not like it... it was just very sudden, I did not expect you to grab my neck, of all places..." he explained awkwardly; he wasn't exactly used to explaining this to people. Or being strangled.

"I'm sorry, I really didn't mean to, I didn't know that your neck was_ that_ sensitive." He said. In all honesty, he kind of wanted to see how Ivan would react if he kept messing with his neck; it sure was a sight to see him so undone so easily. Although it may not be a good idea for Gilbert to test and tease a man stronger than him, especially when he was still recovering, just to see what Ivan would do if provoked further, the very thought was a bit scary.

"It is fine, please, do not worry... like I said, I do not mind if it is you..." Ivan mumbled, secretly wanting Gilbert to understand that his touch was something he wanted badly. It was what he had been waiting for; someone whose touch he enjoyed, to return the feelings as he felt them. He finally had it right in front of him, but how could he grab it without gripping too hard and hurting it? How could he tell Gilbert that he wanted to be touched? How would he react to his want?

.

"Gilbert, I want, you to do it again..." Ivan's voice was quiet and shy, but he was serious.

The same feeling from before settled in the pit of Gilbert's stomach; a warm pressure that faded out quickly. "You... do?" the request seemed, odd... especially from Ivan.

"It is strange, yes? I thought so... I am sorry, it is just how I feel." He said honestly. He didn't see a point in keeping his feelings bottled up.

"It's not weird. I mean, it's normal, right?" Gilbert asked, not quite sure if anything about either of them was 'normal.'

"Normal? Perhaps. You are my boyfriend so I guess it is only right..." Ivan said. The fact that they are dating wasn't even normal. It's bizarre and somehow didn't seem right.

.

The room was quiet for a moment and suddenly a bright flash of lightning filled Ivan's room; the thunder following a few seconds after.

Gilbert hissed lowly at the storm; he wasn't scared of it, it just made him uneasy.

Ivan felt Gilbert's body tense up. "You do not like thunder?"

"No, I don't."

Ivan smiled and pulled him close again, but more gently than before, "Do not worry. I will protect you."

"I-I'm not scared of it! It just bugs me!" Gilbert yelled, trying to sound less like a scared little child. "I don't like when there's no power either!"

"I see... give me a second, okay?" Ivan suddenly moved to the edge of the bed, practically dragging the albino along with him, and rummaged through a desk to the side. After a few silent seconds, a spark followed by the smell of sulfur filled the room. A match lit Ivan's face and he held the small flame to a candle on the night stand. The wick caught and the dim light lit most of the bed.

Gilbert blushed involuntarily. Ivan was, for lack of any other word filling Gilbert's mind, sexy. It was probably just the candlelight but the way it lit his torso was making it extremely hard for Gilbert to look away.

Ivan grinned, noticing the burning stare that the albino was giving him. He chuckled, "How cute."

"W-What?"

"Your face, it is very red. Are you embarrassed to see me like this?" He asked, grinning wider.

"Hah! Like I would be!" Gilbert exclaimed unconvincingly.

"Really?" Ivan asked skeptically and leaned forward, placing his hands on the albino's thin waist and pulling him flush against him again, "Your body seems to say otherwise..." he moved his lips to Gilbert's neck and kissed his pale flesh softly.

"Hey, stop that..." Gilbert told him, not able to think of anything else to say.

Ivan chuckled again, "No, it's too cute~" he moved his lips up and placed a gentle kiss behind Gilbert's ear.

The German stiffened, "S-Stop, why are you-"

"Because, your reactions to my touch are so cute." He explained, "Besides you need to forget about the storm..." he began to move his hands up Gilbert's thin sides and his lips caressed his ear softly.

"N-No... I can, i-ignore it..." he breathed out defiantly, pushing back the small moan in his throat. Why was he refusing this? He knew he liked it, so he didn't know why he was fighting it. He only knew that he had this urge to fight back, something was telling him to resist.

"Even if you ignore it, I won't stop..." Ivan whispered in Gilbert's ear, "Just relax, I won't hurt you." He moved his lips down to the smaller man's collarbone and bit down gently, causing Gilbert to squirm a little. He continued down until his lips connected with the bandages that Gilbert still had wrapped around his chest. This slightly upset Ivan, and he pulled the bandages down a little.

Gilbert twitched back as much as Ivan's tight grip would allow him to, which wasn't much. "What are you doing?" he asked shakily and Ivan loosened the bandages more.

The Russian ignored him and studied the wound on Gilbert's chest; it was mostly healed but once the scab disappears, a scar will remain. "It's looking good. You won't have to wear bandages anymore..." he smiled. He was happy to see Gilbert healing so well.

"Oh... t-thanks... it's your doing, really... you treated it good, so it healed fast..." the albino thanked him awkwardly.

Ivan just smiled up at him, and then moved his lips to his chest to continue his previous work. Ivan chuckled as he noticed the color contrast between Gilbert's pink nipples and the rest of his pale skin. Everything about him is either adorable or beautiful; such a gorgeous creature.

"Don't laugh! You're pissing me off!" Gilbert yelled. He hated being so weak, but his body was starting to give into the effects of Ivan's touch. He also hated that he couldn't tell what Ivan was thinking most of the time; that's what pissed him off when he grinned like that.

The Russian smiled lovingly, "I am sorry, you are just so cute, I can't help myself around cute things."

Gilbert looked down at him, "What do you mean?"

Ivan moved back to look at his face, "I have a habit of obsessing over anything I find cute, I tend to be over-affectionate to the point of scaring people... unfortunately for you, it seems that everyday I find out something cute about you..." he grinned a little, "For example, right now, it's adorable how easily your skin reddens since it's so pale, and how red it gets just makes it more cute."

Gilbert blushed darkly; he wasn't used to getting such compliments or being in this position.

"Ah, so cute~!" Ivan hummed excitedly and kissed one of Gilbert's extremely red cheeks. "I wish you could see yourself right now, it is such an amazing sight."

"N-No... it's not..." Gilbert closed his eyes, he couldn't take much more of this praise; and since when was it a compliment for a grown man to be called 'cute'?

"Hm... I suppose if you enjoyed the sight of you like this, I would be a little worried." Ivan thought out loud, "I hope I am the only one to ever see you like this, Rabbit." Ivan kissed his cheek again softly.

Gilbert twitched and whimpered softly and Ivan took note of the cute sound, however, he wanted to make sure that the albino was okay; as much as he wanted to push his boundaries and test him, he wanted to make him happy and feel safe with him, that was more important.

"Rabbit... you are new to this, yes? Let me help you..." his hand slid down Gilbert's front, resting slightly over the button of the albino's black jeans.

The German twitched violently and he grabbed Ivan's hand quickly, "No, wait p-please..." he whimpered, his face burnt red.

Ivan's face softened with a loving smile, "I will not do anything unless you tell me it is okay. I understand you are scared, but you need not be, you are safe, no one is going to ever hurt you again."

Gilbert clung to the sweet man tightly, he wanted to be coddled and held closely. He didn't realize that his mind was broken as well; he thought it was just his body that had bumps and bruises but his mind was damaged just as bad, if not worse. Ivan was the only one he trusted now, and he was still a little leery about him even.

He felt like crying until he was drained of all of his tears.

.

"Gilbert? Please talk to me, are you alright?" Ivan asked worriedly in the German's ear, holding him close and rubbing up and down his back soothingly.

"I'm fine." Gilbert replied quickly, his voice shaky.

Ivan pulled back and looked at him, "You are lying, I can tell. Please relax, you are safe." He placed his lips on Gilbert's cheek; he was going to hold him until he was alright. His body was very tense and he was shaking a little, small whimpers came from his mouth every so often.

"Shh..." Ivan hushed, gently caressing his cheek with his lips, "You're safe, I promise."

Gilbert looked at him, his face twisted with all sorts of emotion; sadness, terror, pain, confusion, arousal. Ivan felt awful; it was his fault that Gilbert looked like this now.

"I trust you... don't think I don't, I'm just-"

"You don't have to explain, I understand." Gilbert stared at him for a second, grateful that Ivan understood, and then relaxed his body a little in Ivan's embrace.

Just... take some time... just a little time to relax, to regain composure... breathe; in, out, in, out...

.

Ivan lost track of time, it had to be close to a half hour of him just holding Gilbert gently in his arms. Not tightly, just enough to feel if he was still tense or shaking; he didn't want to suffocate the man after all. Ivan could tell just by looking at him and feeling his body that he was weak, exhausted, and just worn out.

"Gilbert... are you getting sick? You seem very warm..." Ivan asked worriedly.

The albino opened his eyes slowly; he didn't want to speak, he just wanted to lean against the Russian and relax, but Ivan may get more worried if he didn't speak up, "Maybe a little..." he admitted honestly. He did feel a little ill.

Ivan smiled a little; it was nice to hear Gilbert's voice sounding less shaky. He placed his hand across Gilbert's forehead gently, "You feel a little warm. Don't worry though, if you get sick I will take care of you." He smiled warmly at him.

Gilbert replied by leaning his head into Ivan's chest. He was thankful that someone was so concerned for his health; the last one who really took care of him was his father, but when he died, Gilbert became the one that had to care for everyone, even though Ludwig wasn't much younger than him, it was his duty as the older brother. So it was nice to have a person there to lean on again.

.

The Russian blinked at him, a little surprised by his actions, and then wrapped one arm around Gilbert's waist, gripping him tightly, his other hand tangled its fingers gently in the albino's soft white hair.

"You are a very beautiful creature, Rabbit. I am glad it is me who gets to have you..." Ivan thought out loud and meant every word. He wanted to make Gilbert forget his pain, and replace those memories with something better.

Gilbert shifted at every word. "Please stop complimenting me..." he mumbled. He couldn't take it anymore. For some reason he felt that strange heat in his stomach again. Why? Ivan wasn't even doing anything of that nature. He was being sweet and innocent.

No... it was his voice. Soft, sweet, affectionate, sexy... how was it possible to be turned on _simply_ by someone's voice?

Perhaps it was everything about him combined, being presented in the form of a sweet voice, that did it.

.

Ivan tilted his head a little, "But why? You deserve to be praised..." The Russian whispered and pressed his face into Gilbert's nape, his warm hand slid around to the back of the albino's neck to hold him in place. "Your hair is as white as the snow outside, it's so very pretty..." he pressed his lips to his flesh, causing Gilbert to shudder; Ivan's lips were cold but made Gilbert's body heat up like a flame instantly.

"S-Stop, please..." Gilbert whined. He didn't know why he refused the feeling; his body was obviously craving it, and he liked it, but something was stopping him from accepting it.

"As you wish." Ivan agreed without defiance and moved back from him, moving his hands to Gilbert's waist. The Russian looked the albino in the eye and noticed a small glint in his ruby irises. Gilbert shivered and almost instinctively moved forward to bring himself closer to Ivan again. He was cold and wanted Ivan's warmth back.

The Russian grinned a little at how Gilbert's pale hands lightly gripped at his arms. "How odd, your mouth and body seem to be telling me two different things~" he hummed, "Tell me Rabbit. Which should I listen to?" He asked and tightened one arm around the albino's back to put more emphasis on his question.

Gilbert clung to him desperately, "I'm. Cold." He grumbled like a bratty child.

Ivan's widened, "Oh really... would you like me to warm you?" the Russian asked; He was being serious with him but he was also teasing him a little.

The albino thought for a second. He knew Ivan was messing with him, but honestly, how bad would it be to be warm? "Only a little..." he mumbled.

"Yes, only a little." Ivan repeated him and smiled, hugging him gently. "How is this?" he asked after snuggling his albino in his arms.

Gilbert shifted his body a little to make himself comfortable, "This is good..." he mumbled contently, leaning his head against Ivan's shoulder.

"Good, I want you to be warm. Do you want the blanket as well?"

"No, just you is fine." The words sounded more awkward out loud than they did in his head.

The uncomfortable shift in Gilbert's body made Ivan chuckle lightly, "I see..." he rested his chin on the smaller man's shoulder gently, "You are so very adorable, Rabbit."

"I-I told you to stop complimenting me!" he retorted, embarrassed.

Ivan only laughed and leaned closer to him, "You are stubborn, loud, obnoxious, bratty, cocky, messy, unmanageable, disobedient..." he whispered teasingly in Gilbert's ear, adding a soft giggle to the end of his comment.

Gilbert was wrong, the insults were worse. How? Why... what the hell...

"Was that worse? Did that turn you on more?" Ivan asked with a ridiculously proud grin on his face.

Gilbert flinched back from him, "I-I wasn't to begin with!"

"Oh? Your mouth and body are telling different stories again~" Ivan only grinned wider as one of his hands slid around to the front of Gilbert's waist, resting gently on the button of his pants again.

"Stop!" Gilbert yelled and threw his hands between his legs, knocking Ivan's hand from him. "Stop teasing me!"

Ivan blinked in confusion, "Teasing? I am not." He said and then sighed lightly, "Do not worry, there is no need to rush. You are fine, so please do not be so upset." Ivan said in an attempt to calm him.

"Ivan..."

"I am here to help you heal and cope, not make it worse. Perhaps I've done enough for tonight." Before he knew what was happening Gilbert was dragged to lay on the mattress next to Ivan, "Go to sleep. You will feel better in the morning." Ivan laid down, leaving nearly a foot gap between their bodies and turned away from the albino. He felt a little bad for making Gilbert feel uncomfortable.

Gilbert quickly became annoyed with his view of Ivan's back. What did he have to do to make the stupid Russian see that he wanted to be close to someone!?

"G-Gilbert? What are you doing...?" Ivan stuttered out when he suddenly felt Gilbert's small body press against his, the small arms of the man wrapped around Ivan's torso, his fingers gripping at the Russian's chest.

"I want to cuddle." He mumbled angrily. Why did Ivan even _need_ to ask? Was he stupid or something?

Suddenly Ivan felt his heart hammering against his ribcage, but he turned over in the arms around him, "If that is what you want..."

"It is..." Gilbert smiled slightly.

Ivan returned the sweet smile and ruffled the albino's hair, "Go to sleep, Rabbit, you need rest."

As if following a queue, Gilbert yawned tiredly and snuggled close to Ivan.

_._

_ My little Rabbit... _Ivan thought to himself as he pet the German's hair softly, cuddling close as well.

* * *

Well, like I said, I hate this chapter... but I'm too lazy to rewrite it -_-'  
Some of you wanted fluff, so I gave you fluff. Maybe a little too much of it, along with feels. Hope you didn't suffocate ^^'

I'm always looking for feedback~ I wanna know what you guys think as the story goes on :)

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**Author's Notes: **

-I said earlier that this chapter is too OOC, so let me explain something to you all: Think of Gilbert in the beginning of this entire story as acting like his normal "1p!" self, but after he was assaulted he slowly began to lose that cocky attitude so he slipped more into what his "2p!" self is like; shy, reserved, quiet, and insecure. So he's not exactly OOC, he's just suffering the effects of being assaulted terribly, and he's also giving into the comfort that Ivan is giving him, thus making him into a clingy and shy person. There, mystery solved~

-Despite how it may seem, Ivan is _not_ interested in sex with Gilbert. He's very open and touchy toward Gilbert for four reasons: **One;** He loves him and naturally tends to want to touch the one he loves in whatever way he can. **Two;** He calls Gilbert "Rabbit" because he's cute and innocent like a rabbit, rabbits are animals that people tend to have as pets; what do people normally do with their pets? Touch and pet them. **Three;** He wants to make Gilbert forget about his assault, therefore he tries to make him focus only on his touch. And **four;** Ivan is very blunt and doesn't understand 'taking it slow' when it comes to anything.

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[Posted: 10.26.2012]


	11. Dagger

This is a shorter chapter again, sorry~

This is more of a stupid, silly, informational chapter that offers some insight into what Ivan has dealt with in the past. That will be explained further in future chapters.

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**WARNINGS:** Sensitive concepts/topics, swearing, use of alcohol, weird stuff, etc...

* * *

**~January, 17th, 2013, later that day around noon...~**

.

Ivan had gone out with Sofia earlier to do some shopping; the stubborn Russian refused to let Gilbert tag along because he noticed a small cough the albino had, along with looking very sluggish after last night. So, Gilbert was force to stay home alone.

Well, _almost_ alone. Natalia was still here, but that just made him want to be home alone even more.

Ivan must be insane. Gilbert hadn't even properly introduced himself to the girl; she always avoided him and never said anything back to him, and Ivan hadn't said anything to him about meeting her since the first time he told him to introduce himself to his sisters.

.

He went into the kitchen to get some water; Ivan had been on him this morning about drinking enough liquid; liquid that was healthy for him anyway. He made some embarrassing comment this morning about Gilbert's lips being too dry.

.

He stood on his tiptoes to reach a glass from the cupboard, bringing one down and turning the water on with his other hand. The water was ice-cold to begin with from it being so cold outside, he tilted the glass under the sink, filling it to the brim.

Upon turning around, he flinched back and about half of the glass was suddenly empty, the liquid splashing out and drenching his shirt down to his skin.

"Wh-What are you doing sneaking up on me like that!?" he yelled and fell back against the sink-top, his heart hammering against his ribcage.

"You have brother's scent on you..." the girl mumbled.

Gilbert blinked at her strangely, ignoring the ice-cold water that was soaking through his thin shirt to his skin. "Erm... what?"

"Do not try to hide it; I know that you and brother have been spending a lot of time together since you came here."

"Uh... I didn't come here, Ivan brought me here." Gilbert gave her a raised eyebrow. Seriously, what was this chick's problem?

The woman glared slightly, finding his reasoning ridiculous and lacking any rationality. "That is not important." She scrunched her nose up a little, "It is disgusting how much you smell like him... you have been sleeping with him haven't you? This is bad; he gets too attached to _strays_ far too easily."

Gilbert ignored her assumption of sleeping with Ivan, even if it was true that he had been. "_Stray?_ I'm not a pet!"

The girl chuckled lightly, "Do not fool yourself; one with a nickname of 'Rabbit' cannot say that he is not a pet."

"Your brother is the one who-! Wait... how did you know about that name?" Gilbert blushed slightly. Ivan never called him Rabbit in public, and he made a point that only he was allowed to call him that.

The woman smiled, "How I know things is none of your business... however, Ivan told me this one." She admitted. Gilbert mentally facepalmed, just what _else_ did Ivan tell this girl? ... did she know about them dating? It didn't seem like it, but how could she _not_ know? She lives in this house, after all.

She sighed and looked up at Gilbert, losing her glare. "I am Natalia, the youngest sibling. You are Gilbert, the loud obnoxious man with the disgusting name; certainly a brute such as yourself is unworthy of the nickname 'Rabbit.'" she smiled sweetly.

Gilbert twitched and stepped forward, finally becoming irritated with her. "Do you have a problem with me or something?"

Natalia stepped forward to the point where it made Gilbert uncomfortable with the proximity of their bodies, and she leaned her head forward and sniffed a little, taking in the scent the albino carried with him. "Your skin smells like him as well..." She mumbled and then snapped her navy blue eyes up to look at Gilbert, glaring icy daggers at him. "Did you have sex with him last night?"

"_What!?_ What the hell are you talking about-!?"

Natalia cut him off with a sudden knife at his throat. "I suggest you answer honestly before I castrate you." She threatened.

Gilbert froze and swallowed roughly, feeling the cold steel press into his nape. This girl... she couldn't be serious, right? ... _right?_

"I-I didn't, I swear." He said as sternly as he could with that blade next to him.

"Why does your skin reek of him then? It's not just your clothing but your entire body." The woman moved her dagger away from Gilbert's neck but held it firmly in her hand as if ready to attack at a moments notice.

"I... slept in his room... in his bed... with him..." Gilbert told her and looked down, his snowy hair falling over his eyes.

"Naked?" Natalia asked.

"Shirtless." Gilbert corrected her carefully. He knew that it was in his best interest to be honest with this girl or she might actually kill him.

The Russian moved back from Gilbert, "I see... well, I suppose I shouldn't harm you since you are brother's beloved pet, so I will not."

"Thank god-"

"If you make him cry I will kill you."

Gilbert growled under his breath, "What is your _problem_ with me? I never even did anything wrong."

"You also haven't done anything right. If you think that I'll trust you just because you haven't done anything wrong yet, then you are sorely mistaken."

"You don't make any sense, you know that?" Gilbert grumbled.

Natalia gave him a glare, but gave into him slightly. "Fine, you want me to explain things so your incompetent brain can understand? Let me explain how things usually happen here: Ivan lets a stranger into our house with open arms, he trusts then far too easily, they seem to be friendly enough, but they just use him for whatever reason they have; money, sex, a place to hide, free room and board..." Natalia moved to the table where she pulled out one of the beautifully crafted chairs. "Sit. I'm not done with you yet." She demanded.

Gilbert swallowed and sat in the chair without any sort of defiance. He felt like there was a dark glowing aura behind him, like it was ready to stab him if he didn't cooperate.

Natalia smirked to herself. If this man would stay this submissive and scared, then maybe she would be a little more tolerable of his presence.

"I'm sure you've noticed how open Ivan is with you, it's because he likes you, obviously. Something about you just infected him and he's not the same person at all. I don't know what it is, but I hope he isn't making a mistake.

"Maybe if you weren't so cold to me, you'd like me too." Gilbert scoffed lightly. He still wanted to voice his opinion; he couldn't let himself be weaker than Ivan's youngest sister.

"Doubtful. However, I might find you less annoying." Natalia smiled almost sweetly at him.

Gilbert sighed, not seeing her little grin. "I'm not _that_ bad..."

"Regardless, you've noticed how open he is. Don't think you are special; he is like that with everyone who attracts him, he lets them close, too close. That is why I asked if you had sex with him yet..." she looked away, it infuriated her to think about this. "He is not a sexual person, he touches to be close, that is all..."

Gilbert looked down at his hands in his lap. "I see... he seems like the type to just take what he wants, so if he wanted that I guess he would have taken it by now."

"I should slap you for even saying that! Do you think Ivan is some sort of monster that will rape you if he wanted sex!?" Natalia gripped Gilbert shoulders angrily, her sharp nails digging into his skin.

"N-No! That's not what I meant! I just think that if he wanted that he'd do something that would make it obvious!"

Natalia was still fuming but she forced herself to calm down and unlatched her nails from Gilbert's shoulders, "Fine, but do not think that just because he touches you that he wants you, it's too soon for him..." she mentally twitched, the very thought of her precious brother and this man... it disgusted her.

"I... I'm not interested in sex either..." Gilbert mumbled, blushing slightly. It was partly true, but he won't lie that the Russian created some sparks in him.

Natalia walked around to the front of the German. "Oh, Ivan is extremely interested in it-"

"What!? Will you decide what story you want to tell-!?"

Natalia pushed on Gilbert's head, "Quiet. Ivan may not be lustful, but he does want that special person to love him for everything that he is. Sex is something that he wants, but with the right person at the right time."

Gilbert went silent and tried his damnedest not to blush. Thinking about being loved thoroughly by Ivan, no matter how sweet, was an arousing thought.

Natalia noticed the little blush and pushed on Gilbert's head again. "Stop thinking about my brother, you pervert. He won't do it, not even if you rip your clothes off and present yourself to him."

"Eh...?" was the only sound Gilbert could make as the mental image flooded his mind. Was he supposed to strip and yell 'take me!' at Ivan?

... he hoped not.

.

"You were just assaulted, idiot. Even three years from now, giving if you're still alive, he'll still be hesitant to do it with you; he doesn't want to take the chance of hurting or scaring you."

"That idiot... does he really think that I'll be scared of him?" Gilbert mumbled to himself.

"Yes, and he's scared of you leaving him like the rest did... so I swear, if you make him cry... I'll make you suffer."

"I won't! Maybe good tears, but I don't plan on hurting him!"

"Good then, we should get along decently." The Russian said and looked down at him, smirking but fully disgusted. "You should go change; your shirt is a mess, as is the rest of you. You should probably work on your self-control."

"Eh?" Gilbert blinked and then looked down at himself and blushed darkly, noticing that he had thought a bit _too_ much about Ivan and himself. "I-I have to go!" Natalia sighed as she leaned to the side, the German running past her like he was on fire.

Really, this man was just so... childish. Ivan was right about one thing, she admitted, he _was_ rather amusing.

* * *

Again, sorry for the short chapter ^^'

.

I'm always looking for feedback~ I wanna know what you guys think as the story goes on :)

.

**Author's notes:**

-See? I told you I didn't forget about Natalia.**  
**

-Now, I'm just gonna say that I don't think Natalia is _too_ OOC. You can tell that she loves her brother, but not in the "Marry me!" way a bunch of people seem to think she does, and that's portrayed in the anime.**  
**

-Natalia is actually very talkative, once she finds the right topic (be it friendly or somewhat of an interrogation) she'll talk for a while. In this case especially since it's about her concern for her brother.

-Gilbert has absolutely no control over his body. Please excuse him for that.

-Oh, I guess an important thing in this chapter is that you see hints of things that happened in Ivan's past. So yeah... not really a good thing, but oh well.

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[Posted: 11.18.2012]


	12. Secrets

4,872 words. 7 and a half pages. _Finally_.  
I don't really have much to say for this chapter. There's feels, humor, fluffy romance, and making out.  
This is my longest chapter so far, which makes me happy but hopefully the length doesn't bother you guys.  
Anyway, hope you enjoy~

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**WARNINGS:** Sensitive concepts/topics, swearing, use of alcohol, weird stuff, etc...

* * *

**~January, 17th, 2013, later that day, again~**

.

Gilbert took the longest and coldest shower that he could before his skin began to sting. Normally his skin is extremely pale, but the frigid water had turned his skin a raw red.

How could he let himself get so excited like that? And in front of Ivan's little sister, for crying out loud!

It wasn't even the fact that he was turned on in front of her that scared him; that girl is a trained killer{an exaggeration of Gilbert's imagination, mind you.}! She's so protective of her brother to the point of being creepy! Why is Sofia the only sane one here? She may be a bit skittish and nearly suffocates people with her cleavage but still, she's the most normal one here. Besides, death by cleavage would be a lot nicer than death by a cold dagger or whatever Ivan kills with... a pipe, maybe? He seems like someone who'd just use anything within arms reach at his disposal.

.

He couldn't even look at himself in the mirror; he just wrapped a towel loosely around his waist and pushed the bathroom door open, not bothering to dry his hair.

He went to his dresser and pulled out a pair of his boxers and those awesome blue military-like pants that Ivan had bought him a few days ago and pulled them on. He rummaged through the second drawer of his dresser trying to find his black button-up shirt and the matching coat to his pants.

.

"You're soaked~" a chillingly cheerful voice chimed.

Gilbert twitched and grabbed his damp white towel and covered his torso quickly and turned around hesitantly; blinking in terror at who he knew had snuck up on him.

Of _course_ it was Ivan. Who else did you expect?

The Russian leaned against the decorative frame of the doorway, his eyebrows furrowing curiously with a smug grin tugging at his lips. "What are you, a woman?" he asked with not a drop of the sarcasm that his question held dripping from his voice. It was beyond his understanding but rather amusing how the albino was covering his chest like an exposed girl.

"It's just a reaction!" Gilbert yelled. He really did panic all too easily, and for no reason at all.

"But you are not a woman; you have nothing to hide there."

"I still don't like being seen half-naked!" the albino retorted.

_'Cute.'_ Was the first thought to register in Ivan's mind, causing his smirk to broaden a little. "But your body is so pretty~" the Russian hummed, "How odd though, you had no problem being shirtless last night."

"That was different!" Gilbert yelled again, and then shifted uncomfortably at how his outburst caused the taller man to close the door rather harshly and begin to walk toward him.

"Oh? How so?"

"Because it was dark, I couldn't see." Gilbert said, confident that his reasoning was fool-proof.

"But you had a flashlight, and you found my room. I think you are just being shy~" Ivan said, stopping a few feet behind the man.

The albino turned away from him and blushed a little. "I'm not, I just..."

.

Ivan waited for the rest of the German's 'reasoning', but there wasn't any, only silence. He stared at the man's back, noticing that water had gathered at the tips of Gilbert's snowy white hair, dripping off and gliding gracefully down the albino's pale back. Ivan's eyes were trained intensely on one of the droplets, following it all the way down the small curve of Gilbert's spine before it soaked into the hem of his pants.

The Russian swallowed roughly, his throat dry and not able to hold himself back.

Gilbert was completely taken off guard as Ivan's large body slammed into him suddenly from behind. "What are you-! Aah, h-hey!" Gilbert yelled when Ivan's tongue slid from his shoulder blade up to his neck, lapping up another droplet. "Wh-What are you doing!?"

Ivan rested his head on Gilbert's bare shoulder and smiled, the albino's damp hair sticking to the side of the Russian's face. "Drinking water. Isn't that obvious?" he asked playfully.

"This is not a proper way to drink water, you- Nnh..." the small mewl vibrated in Gilbert's throat. Ivan's hands pushed the towel from his chest, his fingers gently feeling at Gilbert's nipples.

"Oh? What was that?" Ivan grinned. He loved how sensitive the albino was. He touched his cold fingers against Gilbert's nipples again, experimenting with pinching, different directions and pressures, causing the smaller man to squirm and nearly go limp in his arms.

"S-Stop it..." Gilbert whined quietly.

Ivan smiled and laid his hands flat over Gilbert's breasts and snuggled his face into the man's nape, "I am sorry, you are just too cute, I can't help it." Ivan apologized and kissed Gilbert's neck softly, "I didn't get a 'welcome home' from you today, so I wanted to make up for it..."

Gilbert sighed, "Sorry, I was a little busy earlier." As the words exited his mouth, he instantly regretted it. To Ivan 'busy' probably meant doing something he wasn't supposed to. To Natalia it probably meant masturbating furiously in the shower to the thought of her brother screwing him. In reality, in involved much less self-love than one would think; Gilbert wasn't someone to do that, unlike his little brother, who was always looking at and buying porn and doing unspeakable but clearly audible things to himself in the late hours of the night.

"Busy in the shower?"

"Yeah."

"Hm... didn't you just take one yesterday?" Ivan asked and then smirked a little at how his question made Gilbert shift in his arms.

"I like to keep things clean."

Ivan had to force himself not to let out a loud laugh and managed to chuckle lightly at the blatant lie. He looked around the albino's room, "This is keeping things clean?" he asked and then gave the man a small squeeze, "Or did you mean something else by_ 'things'?_"

Gilbert blushed just slightly, "Personal hygiene is more important to me." Honestly, how far was this lie going to go? Not that he doesn't care about his hygiene; he just didn't want to admit the reason for his unnecessarily long shower.

"You smell like flowers..." Ivan mumbled and buried his face into Gilbert's snowy damp locks, and then licked along his neck, "and your skin tastes good."

Gilbert held back a blush and another whine, "Don't you dare turn into a cannibal..."

The Russian chuckled, "Do not worry, I do not wish to eat you." He smirked a little.

"That's good, probably not healthy either."

"I'm sure~" Ivan hummed, "So why _did_ you take a shower? Did you spill something on yourself?"

Then Gilbert saw it, his escape. "Yeah, I spilled a bunch of water on my shirt."

Ivan smirked, sensing another lie, "So you took a shower even though you could have just changed and it would have dried?"

"Yes alright!? Jeeze, I shouldn't be interrogated for taking a freakin' shower! Shouldn't you be happy or something!?" Gilbert yelled as he in Ivan's arms.

The Russian tightened his grip on the albino, "I am happy, my little bunny is clean and smells good~" he hummed happily, pulling Gilbert to the side and onto his lap as he sat down on the nearby bed.

"Bunny? Seriously...?" Gilbert ignored being dragged for the moment.

"Hm? When we're alone like this, I should be able to call you that." Ivan mumbled, pouting a little.

"Whatever... just don't make a habit of calling me that in public..." Gilbert sulked.

Ivan however, beamed a happy smile and snuggled his face into his Rabbit's neck. He enjoyed how easily the albino gave in. "So you spilled water on yourself?"

"Yep."

Ivan grinned, "How cute."

Gilbert turned to him with a bewildered look on his face. "You get turned on by the _weirdest_ things."

Ivan tilted his head slightly, "What? I didn't get turned on; I simply said it was cute."

Gilbert sighed, "Right, but you get all touchy when I do something 'cute'"

"Don't people normally touch cute things?" Ivan asked innocently, looking utterly confused and tightening his arms around his boyfriend's abdomen.

"Yeah, but I doubt you'll start making out with an actual rabbit if it's being cute." Gilbert said.

"No~ You're the only rabbit I'll ever make out with." Ivan said softly in the albino's ear.

Gilbert blushed brightly. Had they even technically made out yet? At what point is kissing considered 'making out'? He felt a little stupid for not knowing.

Ivan chuckled quietly. Really, Gilbert was the cutest thing ever. "You want to right now?" he asked in a whisper, a smug grin pulling his lips up reflexively.

"D-Do what?" ... why did he even ask...

Ivan's grin widened, "Make out."

"I-I'm good." Gilbert turned from him.

"You are lying~" Ivan hummed, "I can see right through you; you are thinking about it."

The red-faced albino turned back to the Russian, "I... I didn't say I _never_ wanted to..." he mumbled, his eyebrows furrowing slightly and he avoided eye-contact.

Ivan smiled and thought for a moment, studying the German's body. "Hm... you have little bumps all over your body." Ivan said and ran a hand up the center of Gilbert's front. The sudden warmth sent a shiver throughout his body.

"I'd be warmer if you let me put a shirt on..." Gilbert grumbled. He honestly didn't care either way, he just felt like he had to protest in some way.

Ivan pouted a little and snuggled his face into Gilbert's nape again. "That's no fun~" he whined childishly.

Gilbert pushed away from the man as much as he could, "I-I need to talk to you about something!" Gilbert yelled in a panic.

"Hm? Then talk~"

"It's awkward in this position!"

Ivan forced himself not to glare at Gilbert. He hated not getting what he wanted. He sighed and released his grip on the smaller man and slid backward on the bed so that their bodies weren't touching anymore.

.

Gilbert breathed out a little and then wrapped his blanket around his body due to the unwelcome cold, and turned to his disgruntled boyfriend. "It's about your sister, the little one, I mean..."

Ivan blinked at him, "Natalia?"

Gilbert nodded, "Does she... hate me or something?"

"Probably." Ivan said simply. "She'll avoid you, but she'll be the first to know all of your dirty secrets."

"That's a little scary." Gilbert said. Yeah, Natalia already knew one of his 'dirty secrets.' Which was rather embarrassing.

"Do not worry too much about it, that is just how Natalia is. She doesn't trust anyone other than Sofia or myself; you are a strange man that suddenly started staying with us, and both of my sisters have noticed a change in my personality since I've took you in. So naturally, Natalia will not trust you easily." He explained.

Something caught Gilbert's attention, "You've changed?"

Ivan's eyes saddened. He should have known not to say anything; of course Gilbert would want to know, and he knew the man well enough that he wouldn't let him off that easily.

"Yes... before you came into it, my life was something that felt pointless to me. I've seen horrible things, watched people I love die, and then I was- ah... that is not important... All I had was two sisters who worried daily about me. I drank a lot, sometimes I got violent... I became someone who hated everything and everyone around me for no reason." He looked up at Gilbert, who had been staring at him the entire time with a tragic, devastated look plaguing his face.

Ivan knew this would happen; it was why he didn't want to tell Gilbert anything about himself before he came into his life. He was a horrible person before and he didn't even want to remember it.

He felt like he had to do something. Seeing Gilbert look that broken was painful to see, it reminded him to much of the night he found him; that broken, nearly lifeless expression was hard to forget.

"One night..." he started, "I was wandering around Moscow, hoping someone would put me out of my misery... but instead, I found you lying in a pile of snow, barely breathing and covered in blood. I thought you were dead and I was just going to leave you, but... I heard a small cry come from you, and for some reason it changed my entire attitude. I went to you and I saw that you were still alive... even when nearly unconscious, you clung to me so tightly." He smiled a little; even though the look on Gilbert's face hadn't changed too much, he was somewhat happy to tell this part to Gilbert. "I fell in love with you and I didn't even know your name, I just knew that you needed my help. It may sound crazy, but then again, I _am_ a little crazy..."

.

Gilbert was speechless. He didn't know which part to focus on anymore. The fact that Ivan was suicidal before, that he had seen death, or that he was in love with him from the very start. It was strange to hear him talk so much, and telling such a tale.

Ivan smiled sadly, "I am sorry, that is a lot to take in. I shouldn't have said anything."

Gilbert shook his head and crawled over to the Russian, sat between his legs and lightly gripped his coat. "It's fine..." he mumbled and hugged Ivan under his arms, snuggling his face into the Russian's chest.

"You want to cuddle, even after that?" Ivan asked. He was a little shocked; he didn't think Gilbert would want to even be near him after that, nor being so cuddly.

"This is the only thing I can think of doing..." Gilbert said quietly.

Ivan smiled, "You are very cute... thank you."

"Shut up already, _I _should be thanking _you_, you save my life..." Gilbert mumbled.

"You saved me as well." Ivan made Gilbert look up at him, "Gilbert, I would have killed myself if you were not here."

Gilbert smiled a little, "I guess we're even then."

"Hm... maybe." Ivan enjoyed the look of scared curiosity on the albino's face, "Do you love me as well?" he asked.

"I..." Gilbert thought, _was_ he in love? He felt like he was falling, but was he there yet? "I... think I might be falling for you... y-yeah..."

Ivan beamed with a bright smiled full of happiness, "Say it~! Say you love me~!"

"What? N-No!" Gilbert yelled, blushing brightly.

"Say it." The Russian said seriously, gripping hold of his boyfriend tightly.

Gilbert swallowed, "I love you." The albino said sarcastically and then pouted like a brat.

Ivan smirked, "You are a very sore loser, Rabbit."

"That's not my probl-mmpff-!" Gilbert was silenced when Ivan's lips crashed into his suddenly.

"Yes, but it is _my_ problem now. I can easily deal with it though; I am a very good winner." He smirked slightly.

Gilbert blinked at him, blushing a little from the sudden kiss. "Are you _threatening_ me?"

"With love~" Ivan hummed with a smile, but the smile disappeared instantly. "Let's stop talking now. I want to kiss you again."

The albino groaned slightly, "Talking didn't stop you before..."

This made the Russian grin, "Was that an invitation?" he asked, a slight undertone of darkness in his voice.

"Ah... um... s-sorta..." Gilbert stuttered over himself.

With that, Ivan kissed him, softly this time. The gentleness made Gilbert blush; Ivan had kissed him gently before but this time was different, it was almost as if he was _teasing_ him.

The Russian resisted the urge to smile, he could feel Gilbert's body react to his actions, and it was just the cutest thing ever. He grinned slightly and then poked his tongue against Gilbert's lips just enough in hope of another cute reaction. Which he did.

Gilbert backed away a little, "What...?" he mumbled confusedly.

"You are very sensitive, it's so cute." Ivan grinned, "I only touched you a little."

Gilbert admitted, "I, I wasn't expecting you to do that..."

"Hm... if I am going to attempt to make out with you, would you like me to inform you so you can prepare yourself?" the Russian asked in all seriousness.

"I don't need you to warn me! It was just sudden!"

"But... if that was too sudden, I should warn you, right? But you don't want me to, what should I do, then?" Ivan mumbled almost incoherently. He was legitimately confused on what Gilbert expected of him.

"Just... keep going, or something. I'll get used to it, right?" The albino's pale face reddened.

Ivan stared at Gilbert, endeared that he was so honest, but also not particularly liking the idea of the man getting used to his kisses; he never wanted Gilbert to get used to his touch.

The silence was starting to annoy Gilbert and he could feel the Russian's stare on him, "Don't think I'm being desperate or something! I'm just being honest!"

Ivan chuckled, "What if you are honestly desperate?"

"I'm not! Wanting something and being desperate are different things!" Ivan smiled; he wondered if Gilbert realized that he just admitted that he wanted Ivan to kiss him.

The Russian leaned forward and kissed him softly, giving him partially what he wanted. "You're so cute when you're being so bluntly honest."

"Sh-Shut up..."

"And when you're flustered? Adorable." He teased again, planting quick kisses along Gilbert's cheek and jaw.

"Shut up!" Gilbert yelled and moved back, hiding his face in his hands.

Ivan smiled slightly, "Please do not hide, I did not mean to make you mad..."

"I... I'm not mad... I'm just- the compliments... too many of them..." Gilbert mumbled quietly as he peeked between his fingers. He had grown used to being complimented with the word 'cute' but it was from all of the wrong people, people that he hated even sharing air with. However when Ivan says it he just gets so flustered and can't respond correctly, or doesn't even know what a correct response would be.

"If you don't like it then tell me. I don't want you to be uncomfortable." Ivan stated, looking the albino in the eye seriously.

Gilbert stayed quiet for a second, "It's... not that I don't like it... just, don't be mad when I don't reply or anything... I don't know how to react to your bluntness..."

Ivan thought for a moment, "Hm... just keep being cute and cuddle me or something."

The albino looked away, "That's not really like me..."

"And being madly in love with someone, smiling at the thought of them and wanting to spend every second with them is _very_ unlike me." He stated honestly, "We all change depending on who we are with; so, you be my cute little Rabbit, and mine only." Ivan wanted Gilbert to look at him but he knew that he wasn't used to this sort of attention, but he loved seeing Gilbert flustered, it was a way for Ivan to see genuine proof of how he felt.

After all, Gilbert tends to hide behind a mask when he gets embarrassed and tries to avoid the issue. Of course he just gets even cuter at that point.

Ivan wondered if his cuteness would ever stop growing, but he really hoped not.

.

Gilbert looked at Ivan shyly. What was happening to him? His cool, composed, and dominant attitude faded around Ivan. He was becoming less mouthy and gave into Ivan's childishness very quickly.

He's getting soft, or at least, he thought so.

"Gilbert, you are okay, right?" Ivan asked, faint worry in his voice.

The albino nodded slowly, "I'm fine."

"I don't believe you, but I won't bug you about it, as long as it is nothing too bad." he said and then smiled, "Remember, you can tell me anything."

Gilbert paused for a second, "I feel like I'm getting soft." he mumbled.

"What?"

"Like, around you, I just... act different. I don't talk back as much anymore, and I'm just more shy than normal." Gilbert mumbled with a small blush on his pale cheeks.

"You're so adorable. I just have a more dominant personality." Ivan hummed happily.

"I really don't like the sound of that." Gilbert groaned. Even if he knew that it was true, Ivan had a way of being stronger than him. It annoyed him, but part of him didn't mind at all, but that would remain secret. Hopefully.

Ivan smiled, "You'll get used to it."

"A-Anyway..." Gilbert wanted off of the subject of their 'roles', "can you tell your sister not to kill me?"

The Russian chuckled, "She will not. She knows that you are important to me, therefore she will not harm you unless you harm me."

Gilbert sighed, "Well she almost cut my neck earlier." he mumbled and pressed his fingers to his neck where he remembered the cold steel of Natalia's blade pressing into his skin.

Ivan blinked at him and then leaned forward to touch the albino's neck as well, "Why?" he asked.

The Russian's fingers were cold and made Gilbert shiver, "S-She was talking some crap about me sleeping with you." he said.

"That is not nonsense." Ivan said and looked at Gilbert seriously, "You do sleep with me."

"No... I mean... _sleep _with..." the albino blushed a little.

It took a second for Ivan to fully realize what Gilbert was saying. "You mean sex?"

"Yeah..."

"You're so innocent, blushing from just hearing the word 'sex'. I wonder what you'll be like actually doing it." Ivan teased, poking one of the albino's pink cheeks softly. It was rather amazing how fast Gilbert's face turned from a light pink to a deep red that shaded even his ears.

"Do not worry; I do not plan on jumping you." Ivan assured him but couldn't help but give him a little smirk.

"I would hope not! I don't even want to think about that!" Gilbert snapped, blushing deeper than before.

The Russian chuckled and pulled Gilbert closer to himself, "But you're already thinking about it."

"Shut up..." Gilbert grumbled. He hated getting caught so easily like that.

Ivan rested his head on Gilbert's shoulder. "It's a nice thought..." he mumbled quietly, which got Gilbert's attention immediately, "To be that close to someone, to be one for a few moments..." Ivan's voice was sad and pained.

Gilbert tried to understand what he meant, "Ivan, are you okay?"

"Yes, I am fine."

Gilbert paused, "Are you lying?"

"Yes..."

The albino turned in looked at him, "Stop it, you're okay, right? You're making this awkward." he blushed and leaned up and kissed Ivan's cheek gently, "See? You're fine."

Ivan could have sworn that his heart melted at the touch of Gilbert's lips. "Gilbert... thank you... really."

Gilbert looked into Ivan's purple orbs, they seemed to be glowing. Suddenly Ivan went from teasing him to being sad and looking really hurt. There was just so much pain reflecting in those violet irises that it actually made Gilbert's heart ache.

.

The albino shifted himself and moved between Ivan's legs, kneeling on all fours and brought his face close to Ivan's and locked his eyes with his.

"Gilbert?" Ivan questioned him; he noticed a small glint in the albino's ruby irises. His face was burnt red and he looked like he needed to prove something.

"I'm new to this crap, so give me a little time, alright?" Before Ivan could respond, the German's pale lips pressed against his softly. The albino's eyes slid shut almost instantly and his mouth slowly moved against the Russian's lips with a shy, inexperienced tenderness that Gilbert has never expressed before.

Ivan's only move was to gently press his hand onto Gilbert's bare back, he wanted the smaller man to relax and not push himself. Gilbert crawled closer by just a fraction of an inch, causing his lips to press to Ivan's ever so slightly. His mouth impulsively began to coax Ivan's own open with his.

The Russian pulled back instantly upon feeling what the albino was trying to do. "Gilbert please, do not force yourself." He said softly, knowing that if Gilbert got him going, he may not be able to stop.

"I'm not... I'm forcing you." The smaller man breathed out. He knew that Ivan wouldn't do much on his own since Gilbert was just assaulted and all, so the albino took it into his own hands to show him that he was alright.

Ivan smiled; Gilbert was such an adorable man. "Very well, force me. But... promise you won't get scared when I take control." He looked at him seriously.

Gilbert nodded his head slightly, "I won't." he said honestly.

Ivan smiled again and kissed the man's cheek before pressing his lips to his softly. He didn't move, this was Gilbert's time, so he let him have his moment.

The albino moved closer to add pressure on the other's lips, his eyes sliding shut and moving his mouth open against Ivan's again, he deepened the kiss as much as he was comfortable with, practically devouring each others lips.

Ivan resisted the urge to close his eyes so that he could watch his Rabbit's face; Gilbert's expression was just too damn adorable to miss. The kiss was sweet, but the Russian felt a strong need to add some _heat._

With one hand on the German's waist and the other sliding around to the back of Gilbert's neck, Ivan pulled the albino closer and finally deepened the kiss by sliding his tongue passed Gilbert's lips and into the warm, wet cavern behind them.

Gilbert whined loudly as the Russian's muscle brushed against his. The sensation sent a shock throughout both of their bodies that quickly faded into a throbbing warmth.

Ivan grinned into the kiss, the sound that came from the albino made him take control and he began to poke and play with Gilbert's tongue. The small whines and whimpers that the albino made at every touch of the two muscles created a burning heat throughout Ivan's body.

The Russian pulled away, a string of saliva connecting their tongues before thinning out and breaking. "You are not drunk again, are you?" Ivan smiled a little.

"N-No..." Gilbert responded as he panted heavily, his eyes hazed over.

Ivan studied Gilbert's entire body; his face had a dark red streak across it that even colored his pale ears. His body shaking, his arms and legs nearly giving out under him. His eyes glazed over with what Ivan interpreted as want. The poor man wasn't used to this sort of thing at all.

The Russian's hand slid to cup Gilbert's cheek, "Switch places with me."

The albino's eyes shot open wide but he nodded slowly. Ivan smiled and moved back from Gilbert, he let the smaller man sit where he was before and flipped over, placing himself between the German's legs.

Gilbert moved back against the wooden headboard of Ivan's bed as the Russian moved with him. When Gilbert's body stopped at the board behind him, Ivan's lips met with his in a rough, hungry kiss, forcing the albino's mouth open wide without warning. Gilbert was not used to such a hungry kiss and he was much less prepared for Ivan to get rough.

Ivan felt the smaller man's body tense, as well as him clench his coat tightly and he pulled away just as quickly as the kiss advanced.

"I'm sorry..." Ivan mumbled, feeling like he had done something terrible.

Gilbert simply shook his head, "You're fine."

The Russian gave him a thoughtful smile, "Are you sure? You seem hesitant."

The smaller man looked down, "A little, I guess... not used to it..."

Ivan watched him for a moment before kissing him lovingly, "So then, if I kiss you more, you will get more used to it?"

"Probably..."

"Hm..." Ivan thought to himself for a second, "Just don't get too used to it." He smiled childishly at him.

Gilbert blinked at him, "I really don't understand you sometimes."

"I mean that I want you to be comfortable, but still react so cutely to my kisses." Ivan explained.

"I-I've never been uncomfortable when you kiss me..." Gilbert said.

Ivan grinned slightly, "I see... I'll let you decide then."

Gilbert tilted his head, "Decide what?"

Instead of a reply Ivan pushed his lips against Gilbert's again, and then pulled back just slightly, "How far we go." Gilbert blushed slightly but nodded; suddenly everything Natalia said earlier seemed to make perfect sense. "We'll go at your pace, doing what you want to do." Ivan said with a sweet smile.

Gilbert nodded again, he felt a little pressured now.

.

"By the way Gilbert, you still have to tell me why you took a shower." Ivan smirked, knowing that Gilbert would not easily cooperate and tell him willingly.

He just wouldn't give up, would he?

Gilbert sighed, "Fine, but you _better_ not laugh."

"Of course, of course~" Ivan beamed, he new that when the albino said not to laugh, he was either going to laugh or think Gilbert is totally adorable.

Possibly both.

* * *

I'm always looking for feedback~ I wanna know what you guys think as the story goes on :)

.

[Posted: 11.24.2012]


	13. Unexpected Warmth

Okay, I totally failed. I have to apologize for a few things:

Sorry for the long wait.  
Sorry for this crappy chapter.  
Sorry for the bad editing.  
Sorry for everything.  
Sorry for existing.

*Dies*

* * *

**~January 11th, 2013 - Around 4am~**

.

A woman stood in the doorway, quietly observing the man inside.

She stepped inside and closed the door quietly. "Ivan?" the woman finally said after a few silent minutes. She watched her brother fumble with something at his desk.

The man lifted his head up and then smiled at her; there were heavy bags under his eyes, he utterly exhausted. "Hello Natalia." He spoke, his voice further proving his fatigue.

"Ivan you've been up for far too long, why don't you sleep?" she asked worriedly and walked around the desk to her brother.

"I cannot, not yet." He said simply and turned his attention back to his desk.

"Why? What are you doing?" she walked up behind him and looked over his shoulder and down at the desk. There was a cross, black and outlined with a shiny silver, lying on the desk between Ivan's hands.

"I'm fairly certain that this belongs to him, so I'm fixing it." He said and looped a thin black rope through the small hole at the tip of the cross.

Natalia gave her brother a sad look, "You don't even know him but you're doing so much for him..."

Ivan halted his actions with the necklace and froze. He wished his sister wouldn't lecture him about this. "Natalia... the man needs help. If you would have seen the look on his face when I found him, you would feel differently."

"No, I wouldn't." She said coldly, "He is a stranger; you know what happens when you trust strangers."

"Natalia please-"

"Do not let your guard down, Ivan; I cannot bear to see you get hurt again."

Ivan stayed silent for a moment, sliding his finger across the cold iron cross gently, "It is different now..."

"Ivan... do not tell me that you have fallen for him..."

The man shook his head slowly, "No." he lied, "I just feel like if I don't help him, something bad will happen... besides, this isn't about me anymore, alright?" he turned his head to look up at her and smiled brightly.

Natalia sighed lightly and placed her hand on her older brother's head. He couldn't hide his weakness from her, but she just accepted it as how he was. "Very well, just... get some sleep soon, alright? I don't want you making yourself sick."

"I'll be fine, do not worry."

Natalia smiled just slightly and leaned down, placing a tiny kiss on Ivan's cheek, "Goodnight, Ivan." She couldn't help but worry about her brother, but she wouldn't pressure him too much about it.

"Goodnight, Natalia."

.

Ivan watched as his sister left his room. Once his door was firmly shut and he was convinced that Natalia was gone, he turned his head back to the cross. He wondered what kind of man the sleeping albino was. What things had he seen in his life? What family he had? He also wondered what happened to him to get him in this position; did he provoke his attackers, did he have something they wanted?

The thought made Ivan cringe, he could never understand why someone would hurt another person in such a horrible way; he hated that he was accused of such things himself.

Would someone suspect him of being the one who hurt him? Or worse, would he assume it himself when he woke up? How would the man act when he suddenly wakes up in a strange house with an even stranger man by his side? Would he listen to the truth? Would he believe that Ivan was helping him? Or would he just panic and start yelling, not believing a word Ivan would say?

So many questions ran through Ivan's mind, and he couldn't concentrate anymore.

.

There was just something in the paleness of the man's face that made Ivan want to cling to him for dear life, like he was dead and just frozen in time. It was a strange feeling, but he wanted to know everything about this strange, mysterious man he had rescued from death.  
Did he have a family here in Russia? Is he an orphan, and where did he come from to begin with? Does he live nearby, and what things had he endured in his life? What did his voice sound like and how does he act?

It is something that the Russian didn't understand himself, and honestly it wasn't important, all that mattered was that the man was safe now. Ivan would personally make sure that he was 100% healthy before he left his house, and he would make sure that he returned safely to wherever he was that he belonged.

.

.

A loud ringing caused Natalia to open her deep blue eyes, letting the morning sun temporarily blind her. She lightly tapped the device that was causing the ringing with her hand and it shut off. After she blinked enough so that her eyes focused on her surroundings, she sat up, the memories of last night flowed into her mind. She wasn't sure how to really feel about this matter, it was very delicate. She ran a hand through her tangled blonde locks and rubbed her temples before sliding off of her plush bed and preparing herself to look pretty.

After brushing out her hair to be straight and snarl free, she looked at herself in the mirror, contemplating on what she was thinking.

She let out a heavy sigh and exited her room quietly.

.

She walked down the silent hallway. She didn't expect anyone else to be up this early, not after last night.

After walking down the hall for a few moments, she came across Ivan's room. She peeked inside her brother's room, only to find that he had fallen asleep at his desk, hunched over the wooden desk.

_What an idiot..._ She thought to herself with a small smile as she pulled a blanket over her brother's shoulders. She noticed something, the cross that Ivan was fussing with earlier was gone, but instead a thin tan folder laid under his arms.

.

.

She admitted; the man looked peaceful while he slept. It was strange how one covered in bloodied bandages and wrappings could be so... tranquil.

"Natalia?" A female voice called out and she turned. It was Sofia, standing in the doorway of the room. "It is strange to see you up, especially after last night."

Natalia watched as her sister walked to her side. "I woke up early to treat him." She said, as much as she didn't want to admit it.

Sofia's eyes opened slightly and blinked a few times, and then she gave her sister a soft smile. "How strangely sweet of you."

"Be quiet, it's not for him but for Ivan; this stupid man has already caused Ivan to lose sleep over this." She spat. She really did not like the albino at all.

"He seems happier already, don't you think?" Sofia asked and sat in the chair next to the sleeping man's bed. "I think saving him has shown Ivan how delicate life really is; he may have saved Ivan just as much as he saved him."

Natalia scoffed at the thought, "We are all Ivan needs, all he's ever needed. This man has changed him already. I do not like it."

Sofia sighed silently and glanced over at the man. "Were you planning on killing him and playing it off like he died from his injuries?"

The younger sister was quiet for a moment. "I was thinking about it."

"Natalia, you know that would only hurt Ivan more, after all he went through last night to try to save him."

"Fine, I won't kill him until he hurts Ivan just like the others did." Natalia gave the albino a glare.

Sofia smiled, "Have some faith in the man; I doubt he has ill intentions toward Ivan after what happened to him."

"Not yet, but Ivan plans on keeping this one as a pet, I can feel it. Let's just hope he's a submissive little kitten rather than an obnoxious dog like the rest."

"A cat?" Sofia questioned, blinking her baby blue eyes curiously. "I thought he looked more like a bunny, one of those cute albino ones. Y'know, with the pink-ish eyes?"  
Sofia then stood up instantly when she noticed the increasingly disgusted look on her sister's face. "Perhaps we should leave before we wake him up?" she suggested in a near panic, holding her hands up and smiling a nervous smile.

"I cannot. Even if I hate the brat, I'll help him recover for Ivan's sake, so I have some things to do here." She said and noticed the look that Sofia was giving her and sighed, then suddenly flung her knife out from its hiding place in the sleeve of her dress. "Here, take it. I won't kill him, I promise."

Sofia smiled slightly and took the knife from her sister, "Good, then I'll go check on Ivan in the meantime."

"Fine, he's sleeping but he might wake up; knowing him he'll be too panicky to sleep and he'll want to see his pet when he does wake up."

.

Sofia walked to Ivan's room after leaving Natalia to care for the sleeping man. Ivan was still asleep laying on his desk.

"Ivan?" she called out quietly and shook him gently, "Ivan, wake up."

The man stirred awake and sat up, feeling his body ache from the uncomfortable position he had slept in, "Sofia?"

The woman smiled, "Why don't you lay in your bed?"

Ivan quickly looked out the window and then up at his sister, "I can't, I need to check on him."

"Natalia is helping him now, you need to rest." She said worriedly.

"No, I want to- I need-" He stood up quickly, towering over Sofia.

"Ivan please, let Natalia take care of him; you can help him later after you rest. I'll even help her, I'll make sure that he's okay, and I'll come wake you up in a few hours, alright?"

Ivan still had that persistent look in his violet eyes, but he gave in; Sofia always had a way of convincing him to do or not to do something.

"Good." Sofia sighed and grabbed one of Ivan's hands softly and led him to his large bed. He was dragging his feet heavily and wobbling from side to side, the man was utterly exhausted. "Now lay down and sleep, I promise he'll be here when you wake up."

Ivan slumped down onto his bed and closed his eyes, "Don't let Natalia hurt him, please."

Sofia stroked his hair softly, "She won't, I promise. Now please, just get some rest, you've had a tough night."

Ivan opened his eyes slightly and gave her such a pathetic look that it actually made her heart ache; he just looked so exhausted. "His name, it's Gilbert, he's German, I cannot pronounce his last name..."

Sofia smiled softly, "I see, we'll figure it out eventually. Get some rest."

Ivan mumbled quietly and closed his eyes again, he was too exhausted to do or say anything anymore.

.

Sofia walked back to the room where Natalia was with the apparent German named Gilbert.

Upon entering the room she saw Natalia leaning over the albino, messing with something on his neck. "What are you doing?" Sofia asked.

Natalia moved back and looked over to her sister, "I was putting bandages around his neck, I had to remove his necklace to do so..." she said, "You can come feel his pulse if you are worried."

Sofia sighed and walked to Natalia's side, "I don't think you'll kill him, he's too important to Ivan."

"Unfortunately; but as soon as he hurts him or makes him cry..."

Sofia watched sadly as Natalia glared down at the man. It pained her to see their family so scarred from the past. "His name is Gilbert, according to Ivan, he's German." She tried to change the subject. "I wonder if he's albino." She said while she studied the man's unusually pale skin and strange hair color.

"I don't care, he's not important to me." Natalia said coldly. "You know what happens when we trust strangers; Ivan is stupid if he thinks this man is any different from the rest."

Sofia sighed, "I'm not telling you to trust him right away, just give him a chance."

Natalia was not fond of this idea at all, but she gave her sister what she wanted. "Fine, but I will be watching him."

"I would expect nothing less from you." Sofia smiled a little.

.

.

Sofia helped clean some of Gilbert's wounds and applied new bandages and then left Natalia to do whatever else that she felt was necessary. Aside from killing him.

She watched him as his breathing picked up and slowed back down, hints of the pain and discomfort he was feeling was apparent through small twitches in his face.

Was he really that important to Ivan? Why? What was it that made him take him home? He's pretty, Natalia gave him that much, and his skin is flawless with the acceptations of all the cuts and bruises that he acquired last night. Still though, being pretty wasn't a reason that Ivan would have to take in a random stranger and welcome him so easily into his home.

She never understood how Ivan could trust people so easily, but what was it about _this_ man? Why was he so different than say, the people who came to their house claiming to want a job but only wanted a free place to live or hide? Ivan turned those people away instantly, as if he knew that they were up to no good.

Maybe Ivan could tell that this man had no such intentions? ... No, that's not possible, not for Ivan, he trusted too many people in the past; it must have been a fluke. No one except for Sofia and herself love and care Ivan, that's just how it is, how it always will be. The rumors of him being a monster have blended into a bitter reality that became the life they lived daily.

Maybe, I'll try to trust him a little... just to see... Natalia thought to herself.

.

A small groan shook her from her thoughts, and she had been staring at the sleeping man for so long that her eyes went blurry.

She blinked a few times and her eyes finally focused. The man had move slightly, his eyes were fighting to open themselves, but when they did, Natalia stared in shocked of seeing his crimson eyes.

He blinked a few times, adjusting his eyes to the light of the room before opening wide. Natalia had to collect herself.

"So you are alive. Pity." She said. Her skills as a cold-hearted actress were flawless. She very much enjoyed the ragged sound that came from his throat, probably an attempt at speaking. She stood up from her chair that she had been sitting in and went to his bedside.  
"Your name, what is it?" it was a question but definitely not a friendly one. If she was going to accept this man as a housemate, then he has to be trained and taught that he has no authority over her or anyone else in this house.

"G-Gil-" he coughed out and whined at the pain from his chest, "Gilbert Beilschmidt."

"What a disgusting name." Natalia groaned out. The name was atrocious in her opinion. Like word vomit.

"T-Thanks..." the man groaned back.

"That was not a compliment." She said. Of course it wasn't, was he an idiot or was he being sarcastic back at her? Either way was a bad choice for him to be.

Natalia heard a small knock at the door, which the man didn't seem to have heard and she moved to the door to open it.

Ivan stood there in the doorway and he gave her a questioning look. "He is alive, brother." she said reluctantly.

Ivan said something which Gilbert failed to catch, and Natalia retorted but eventually succumbed to her brother's wishes and left the room.

.

Ivan walked closer to the bed after Natalia slammed the door shut. He looked down at the man, he looked utterly terrified. The Russian's lips pulled into a smile that was more creepy than friendly.

"Do not look so scared." he said and sat down in the chair next to Gilbert's bed. _You are safe now..._ he thought to himself before speaking more.

He asked if he could speak, and Gilbert nodded and finally spoke for him. It was hard to explain the type of feeling that he felt at that moment. Hearing the young man's voice was reassuring, but the tone of his voice was also very relieving. His voice was stronger, and a bit more masculine than Ivan first expected, but the strong firmness of his tone was shocking, he didn't expect him to be as calm.  
He wondered, what else about this man was going to shock him.

_Well... we shall see._

* * *

Yeah, so this was rushed because I felt horrible about not updating in so long. This chapter sucks, the edits suck, the _everything_ sucks. If you need me, I'll be over in the corner sobbing my eyes out in utter shame as a writer and disappointment in myself.


	14. Breakdown

So, I had fun writing this chapter, even if it is a bit angsty.  
Anyway, sorry for the long wait. I'm trying to get back into writing this story because a few people seem to like it...

Well, enjoy~

* * *

**~January 18th, 2013 - 5pm~**

.

Ivan tilted the gleaming silver band in different directions, admiring how the shiny loop was flawless and how he could see his own reflection in it as if he were looking into a mirror.

The man behind the counter spoke out to him in Russian, breaking him from his trance, asking if the ring was to his liking.

Ivan replied with a simple, "It's perfect." in Russian. The man at the counter smiled and then asked him about the engraving, and Ivan flipped the ring over and looked along the inside. It was gorgeous work; on the small area on the inside of the ring were the Russian words 'Я тебя люблю' carved so delicately and professionally into the silver.  
Ivan admired it greatly and thought about how nice it would look on a certain albino's pale finger.

The man at the counter spoke out again, asking if the ring was for some lady friend of his. Ivan smiled at him and gave the money he owed along with something extra for doing such a wonderful job on the ring.  
"You could say that." He said and then smiled, "It is for someone very dear to me."

The other Russian laughed, thanking him a few times and told Ivan to give his regards to the 'lucky lady'. Ivan thought it was rather amusing and his thoughts wandered to the image of Gilbert in a frilly white wedding dress, he just couldn't help but think about how upset the albino would be, and how bright his face would be with a flustered blush.

.

As he walked, Ivan let his fingers play with the cold silver band in his pocket. His finger sliding into it, feeling how tight it was around his appendage. Of course, the ring wasn't meant for him, so it didn't exactly fit.  
He smiled, wondering how Gilbert would react to Ivan commissioning a ring for him, and an expensive one at that. He figured Gilbert would be excited and put it on without a second thought, thanking the Russian happily and maybe even give him a kiss [and that thought had Ivan smiling rather stupidly as he walked], or Gilbert would be hesitant and thank him quietly, thinking about how expensive and nice the present was.  
Or maybe he'd assume it was a proposal?

Ivan began to worry a bit now. He didn't want to frighten Gilbert with a proposal; the thought was the farthest from his mind anyway. He just wanted to give Gilbert a nice gift before, _before..._

He shook his head, and continued on home, his smile now gone.

.

Ivan entered his house and a blast of wintery air followed behind him. "I'm home." He called into the house.  
He expected no one, but Gilbert said his name from the kitchen and a few moments later the albino hurried into the foyer to Ivan.

Ivan was ready to greet him happily with a hug and maybe a kiss, but he noticed a look of panic on the man's face. "What's wrong?" Ivan asked instantly with worry.

"I uh... I'm a little scared." That sounded more childish than it was supposed to, but he really didn't care because it was 100% true. "I'm a little shaken right now. Uh... I don't even know what I'm doing..."

Ivan gripped Gilbert's hand tightly. "It's about your attack, isn't it?" Gilbert nodded silently in reply. "I can tell. Don't hold it in, you're safe here." He smiled softly at the man in front of him.

Ivan's words shot right through Gilbert and struck his heart. His face went from confused to scared with tears falling heavily from his eyes. He was ready, ready to just break down. He didn't care if it was shameful to cry like a baby and shake in fear.

Ivan kept his small smile in place even though it broke his heart to see Gilbert cry so hysterically. He placed his hand gently on the back of Gilbert's head and carefully pushed him closer, but not hugging him. The smaller man grabbed onto Ivan's arms tightly, burying his face into the Russian's coat, his tears soaking into the thick, tan fabric.

Ivan shushed him quietly, trying to get him to quiet down a little. His cries were loud and painful sounding. Ivan slowly wrapped his arms around the smaller man. "I'm proud of you, Gilbert." Ivan mumbled under Gilbert's sobs. He was shocked that it took this long for him to break.

Gilbert couldn't reply, he could only look up at the Russian with his throat burning. The albino looked like a mess, his entire face wet with tears that had been smeared across his skin, his eyes bloodshot. His hair looked as if he had just woken up as well.

"Gilbert, you don't have to hide it; it's alright to be scared." Ivan ran a hand down the albino's back, and he could feel the man shaking.

Gilbert continued to stare back at him; he was in too much of a panic to respond with words. He was breathing heavily and gripping frantically at Ivan's coat, tears sill falling from his pink-ish eyes.

Ivan sighed lightly, Gilbert's shutter-y and wheezy breathing and terrified look was starting to worry him. He carefully moved to pick the albino up, bridal style, and noticed how incredibly light he was.

Gilbert clung to Ivan instantly, wrapping his arms tightly around the Russian's neck and then buried his face in Ivan's neck.

Ivan sighed again and ignored Gilbert's hot breath on his skin and began walking. "We'll drink and eat, alright? You haven't been eating much lately."

"I'm fine." Gilbert said quickly, ignoring the Russian's suggestion.

"You don't have to lie either. I told you that it's okay." Ivan reassured him, tightening his grip around the other.

.

Gilbert eventually calmed down a bit, and Ivan invited him to drinks in the dining room. The albino sat there awkwardly as Ivan removed his tan trench coat and hung it over the back of his chair.  
Gilbert felt weak and exhausted from crying so much, and just being emotionally drained in general.

"Uh... sorry for crying like that..." Gilbert mumbled, and took a large drink of the vodka that had been offered to him.

Ivan smiled slightly, "Don't apologize, Gilbert, you have nothing to be sorry for." He said, and then picked up his own glass of alcohol, staring down at the liquid almost sadly. He had been waiting for Gilbert to break, and was still surprised by how well the man had held himself together in the days since the attack.  
All Ivan wanted now was to bring back that bright smile Gilbert used to have, because that look of terror and those tears falling so heavily from his eyes; his entire demeanor was heart-wrenching to even think about.

Gilbert began to tap the table in front of him, his finger creating a small _thud_ sound every time it hit. The silence that took over the room was starting to get under his skin, and he felt like it was eating away at him, like he just needed out. He took another large gulp of vodka and finished it in one go and then set the glass down in front of him.

After a moment, he stood up quickly and stumbled over his own words, "I- I'm gonna go take a bath." he said, looking disoriented.

Ivan stood up and lightly gripped the albino's arm, ready to stop him and talk since he looked so confused, but Gilbert shot him a glare, one with more terror than anger in his eyes.

_"What!?"_ he yelled at Ivan, stumbling backward a little as Ivan released his arm after hearing the albino's voice.

Ivan held his hands in front of him as a reassuring gesture, to show Gilbert that he wasn't going to hurt him. "It's alright, Gilbert, you're safe." Ivan said calmly, trying to get the other to calm down as well.

"Alright? _This_ is _alright!?_" Gilbert screamed, clenching his fists firmly together as his teeth grit tightly. "_Nothing_ is alright! It's _far_ from alright! It's nowhere _near_ being alright!" he shouted more, stumbling backward toward the door. Ivan couldn't do anything but stare with his eyes partially wide in shock as Gilbert shrieked at him.  
"Just... just leave me alone for awhile!" he yelled, and stormed out of the room, slamming the dining room door rather loudly behind him.

Ivan could hear Gilbert's footsteps fading out as he ran away from the room. He sat back in his seat heavily and swore at himself under his breath for being so impulsive toward Gilbert when he was having a mental breakdown. He should have known better than to try to touch him when he was looking so confused and scared.

Ivan poured himself another glass of vodka and drank it all down without setting his glass on the table for a break between swallows. Instead, when he was finished, he threw the glass toward the nearest wall, listening to it shatter and hit the floor in several shards of sharp glass.  
He stood up quickly, knocking his chair over and not bothering to pick it up, and left the room, letting the door swing open on its hinges and slamming against the wall behind it.

He was just thankful that he chased his sisters out of the house for today.

Right, _today_; Gilbert's birthday. A day that was _supposed_ to be special and happy. He was supposed to give Gilbert the ring he had made especially for him, and have a romantic evening with a nice dinner, maybe some kissing, and just a night for them. Ivan wanted it to be sweet and loving, to just show Gilbert that he was loved and safe.  
But now... that image was shattered like glass.

.

Gilbert had retreated to the upstairs bathroom. He quickly stripped his clothing off as the bath was filling with hot water. The tub was pretty big and looked like it could fit more than one person, and he didn't understand why one needed such a big bath, but at the moment, he really didn't care.  
He stood there staring at himself in the mirror, beginning to hate his body and his skin, his hair, his eyes. Everything.

He just had to cause 'problems' for his boss and get fired, didn't he? He had to blow his money on beer and get drunk even though Ludwig told him to be careful. He had to get lost and get mauled by a bunch of people and end up nearly dead in the streets. He-

He shook his head to try to shake the thoughts from his mind, and he went to the bath, carefully stepping over the side and lowering his body into it after turning the water off. He breathed in as the water pricked at his skin and he felt a rush of relief over his body.  
He rubbed at his arms gently with soap and cleaned most of his body, being careful around the forming scar on his chest, since it still felt a bit sensitive there.

He leaned back, letting his body float in the water a bit before he dunked his head under. He had a thought to just stay under there until he...

He pulled his head back up as soon as it became a bit difficult to breathe. He knew, even as much as he hated himself right now, he couldn't take his own life. What would Ivan do if he found Gilbert's lifeless body just floating in ice cold water? How would he react when that initial shock of finding a loved one dead wore off?

'_Ivan... what are you doing right now?_' Gilbert wondered to himself as he sunk down into the tub a little.

'_Why did I snap at him like that? He was just trying to help me but I yelled at him... after all he's done for me, that's how I thank him?_' his thoughts raced and he brought his knees up to his chest and buried his face in his kneecaps, '_He loves me... and I tell him to leave me alone... why...?_' he asked himself, '_I know I'm upset about this whole thing but Ivan was just trying to help...!_'

"I'm sorry Ivan, I'm so sorry..." he mumbled to himself, his voice catching in his throat. Small tears began to fall from his eyes and he began to hiccup a bit from crying.  
The more he thought about Ivan, the more he cried, and his cries got louder. All he could do was bury his face in his knees and cry helplessly.

.

Ivan had gone back to his office for a moment, giving Gilbert some time to breathe and relax on his own. However, after a few minutes he began to worry about the albino and what he might do if left alone for too long.  
He wandered up to the second floor of his home and searched in Gilbert's room; he saw nothing out of place and didn't hear anything so he continued on.

He walked passed the upstairs bathroom and stopped after hearing something from inside. He backed up and listened again, and he recognized it as Gilbert crying.  
He knocked on the door quietly, secretly panicking, and waited for a response, and he got one instantly.

"Go away!" a muffled and screechy sounding voice yelled from behind the door. Gilbert tensed up instantly and brought his limbs into himself after he yelled. '_Why did I say that...?_' he asked himself franticly.

"Gilbert, I'm coming in." Ivan said as a precaution and then turned the knob on the door, and to his surprise, the door opened. He guessed that Gilbert was in too much of a panic to think of locking the door.

Ivan looked inside and saw Gilbert sitting to the farthest side of the bathtub; he was clenching his legs to his chest and peeking over his kneecaps through soaked white bangs that were hanging in his face.

Ivan didn't go any closer; he didn't want to make Gilbert feel like he was being cornered. "Gilbert... are you okay?" Ivan asked quietly, leaning back against the door gently.

Gilbert shook his head from side to side as a few more tears ran down his face, or maybe it was just water dripping from his hair.

"May I come closer?" Ivan asked, hoping that the other would at least let him near him again.  
Gilbert didn't respond right away, and he thought about it. He was a little scared to have anyone close to him right now, but at the same time, he really wanted Ivan by his side...  
After a moment, Gilbert finally nodded a little.

Ivan sighed softly when Gilbert allowed him closer, so he walked to the edge of the tub and kneeled down next to it. There was still a good foot or two between them, but Ivan didn't mind; he was just happy that Gilbert allowed him this close.  
"Can I touch you?" Ivan asked another question, showing only a worried expression as Gilbert looked at him like an animal that had been left out in the rain for hours.

The albino nodded again, but slowly.

Ivan smiled softly and leaned forward, extending a hand out to gently stroke Gilbert's hair from his face, tucking some of the longer strands behind his ears. He moved down a little and stroked Gilbert's cheek carefully.  
When Ivan began touching his face, something caught in Gilbert's throat and he suddenly crawled over to Ivan and threw his arms around the Russian's neck, burying his face into the others neck and splashing some water over the edge of the tub.

Ivan was very taken off guard by this and wasn't sure if he was supposed to embrace him back. He didn't want to make Gilbert uncomfortable by touching him if he didn't want to be touched, but he couldn't control himself for too long.

Ivan let his hands gently rest on Gilbert's back, one on his shoulder blade and the other on the curve of his back, softly gripping at his bare and wet skin.  
Gilbert tightened his arms around Ivan, not caring that he was dripping wet and naked, he just wanted him close.

"Gilbert, why don't you get out, and I'll take you to bed?" Ivan suggested, rubbing his hands up and down the pale man's back soothingly.

Gilbert let his arms slide off of Ivan and he sunk down into the water a little bit and nodded. "Alright..." he agreed quietly.

Ivan sighed as he heard Gilbert's voice; it was nice to hear it in a calmer tone again after he was yelling so much.  
He leaned forward a bit and placed a soft kiss on Gilbert's forehead. "I'll help you dry off, alright?" he said, asking for permission before he actually did anything.

Gilbert simply nodded and looked down. "Sorry for getting you wet..." he mumbled, hinting at how Ivan's shirt was now soaked through with water.

Ivan shook his head and cupped Gilbert's cheek softly, bringing his red-ish eyes up to his, "It's fine, Gilbert. I said before, you have nothing to apologize for." Ivan said sincerely.  
He then leaned in and gently pressed his lips to Gilbert's, softly in case Gilbert didn't want the kiss yet.

Gilbert's face heated up slightly as Ivan kissed him, and he leaned into him a bit more, letting his arms wrap up around the Russian's neck again.  
Ivan leaned in more and slid his other hand into the water, not caring if his sleeve got wet, and moved Gilbert around so he could pick him up bridal style again, and lifted his body from the water. He never broke the gentle kiss as he held Gilbert up and against him.

Gilbert, however, pulled away a bit, blushing a bit more now that he was out of the water. He didn't protest to being lifted from the tub, but he was embarrassed now for being seen naked.

Ivan gave him a soft smile as he sat the albino on a chair in the bathroom. "Don't be so embarrassed, Gilbert." He said, grabbing a black towel and then draped it around the smaller man's shoulders.

"I can't help it..." Gilbert mumbled to himself shyly, and tugged the towel around him, even though it didn't cover his lower body at all.

Ivan smiled down at him and kissed his forehead gently. Gilbert just looked adorable, sitting there blushing and looking so embarrassed. Ivan grabbed another towel and began to tumble-dry Gilbert's hair. Gilbert didn't protest this either, he simply sat there and let Ivan dry him.

The Russian pulled the towel from the others head, causing his white hair to spike up messily, and he began gently rubbing it down Gilbert's arms. There was such a contrast between Gilbert's pale skin and the black towels, and Ivan found himself rubbing the towel down Gilbert's arms in a loving way, as if he was admiring how flawless his skin was.

He eventually pulled back, smiling still at the albino. "Would you stand up, please?" he asked, and Gilbert just looked up at him for a moment before nodding and then standing up, and at the same time he pulled the towel that was around his shoulders down over his lower regions.

Ivan smiled and let his towel hang over the back of the chair, and he carefully touched onto the towel around Gilbert's waist.  
All of his movements were careful, just in case he might cross a line with Gilbert and do something he wasn't 100% comfortable with.

Ivan took Gilbert's lack of protesting as an okay, and he gently dragged the towel up his back, rubbing it up and down as he dried his skin of water. His front was bare and facing Ivan, and the Russian was alright with this fact because he was simply helping Gilbert.  
He knew if he left Gilbert to himself, the man would wind up in bed with his skin still damp and his hair soaked.

Gilbert was blushing, that was painfully obvious to Ivan, and he was looking off to the side. He looked sad still and _extremely_ tired. Ivan guessed his exhaustion was why he was able to do as much as he was without Gilbert retorting in some way.

Ivan took a small step forward, and carefully slid his hands down with the towel, going a bit lower to reach Gilbert's behind. He did so very carefully, watching and listening to everything Gilbert did.  
The albino blushed darker when he felt Ivan's hands back there, but he just turned his head more and let Ivan continue.

The Russian sighed a little, a soft smile on his lips. He moved his hands down a little more and rubbed as lightly as possible so it didn't feel like he was groping the other; but it was hard, even for Ivan, to control himself when touching Gilbert, especially since he was naked.  
Ivan looked down when he suddenly felt the albino's head lean into his shoulder, and Ivan simply couldn't take it anymore. He pulled the other close so that their bodies were flush against each other, and he let his hands sit firmly on Gilbert's behind, still with the towel between their skin.

Gilbert buried his face into the Russian's chest, his face a bright red and his eyes closed. He appreciated everything Ivan was doing. Coming to him even after he screamed at him, and helping him, and even the way he was touching him. It felt safe, like Ivan was protecting him.

Ivan pulled back from Gilbert and looked down at him, "I'm going to dry your legs now, so..." he said, understanding that it would probably feel awkward for Gilbert if he touched too far up his legs.

Gilbert nodded a little and looked away, blushing softly. Ivan watched him as he did so, and continued on. Pulling the towel from around Gilbert's waist, which caused him to shiver slightly from the sudden cold, and Ivan kneeled down in front of the other. He was slow about it, in case Gilbert would change his mind.  
The Russian carefully slid the towel around one of Gilbert's pale legs and rubbed up, watching the other as he did so. Gilbert's eyes were closed and he was blushing brightly, which Ivan thought was cute, but he knew Gilbert was embarrassed and probably uncomfortable with this, so he didn't drag the torture out.  
He quickly finished drying the other and hung the towels up so he would remember to wash them later.

"I might have a shirt in here for you to wear while you get your other clothes." Ivan said and walked over to a small slide-open cabinet.

Gilbert stood there, as if patiently waiting for an order from the Russian. Said Russian finally pulled out a long white shirt, much like the one he let Gilbert wear when he woke up on the first day. Ivan walked back to Gilbert and slid his arms into the shirt for him, and began buttoning it up. It was indeed long enough to cover his lower regions, so Gilbert was at least covered now.

Gilbert said a small 'thanks' and still tugged at the bottom of the shirt; he still felt a bit exposed, probably because he wasn't wearing underwear, so, that made it uncomfortable.

Ivan smiled softly and gently took Gilbert's hand into his, "I'll take you to your room." He said, and began pulling Gilbert along with him, shutting off the bathroom light before walking down the hall.

.

Ivan opened the door to Gilbert's room and led him in, and then let go of his hand. "Finish dressing, and I'll tuck you in." he said.

Gilbert paused for a moment and then went to his dresser, and only pulled out a pair of boxers. He quickly slipped them on and then went to the bed, sat on the edge of it and waited.

Ivan smiled a little and walked to Gilbert and he patted the pillow with his hand as a way of telling Gilbert to lie down.  
Gilbert did, lifting his legs up onto the bed and moved himself into position as Ivan pulled the blanket up over his body. The Russian began tucking the blanket snugly around Gilbert's frame and the albino closed his eyes tiredly.

After tucking the other male in, he leaned down and kissed Gilbert's forehead. "Goodnight, my little Rabbit, sleep tight." He whispered softly, and pulled back, brushing some strands of snowy hair from Gilbert's face, which fell right back into place.  
Gilbert was exhausted and already falling into sleep, but he smiled tiredly at Ivan's gesture and words.

Ivan sighed and watched Gilbert for a moment, just watching him breathe calmly. He put his hands in his pockets and felt something cold and hard in the right one. He gripped it curiously and pulled it out, and looked surprised to find that it was the silver ring he had bought for Gilbert.

He looked back at Gilbert after staring at the ring for a moment, and then sighed sadly. He slipped the ring back into his pocket and left the room, shutting the light off and closing the door quietly.

* * *

I _finally_ finished this chapter. Sorry for the wait, and I hope you liked it~

.

Special thanks to **CountItNot** for inspiring the bath scene in this chapter by role-playing with me. I know it wasn't _anything_ close to what happened in our role-play, but that scene helped shape what I wrote for this chapter, so I wanted to credit you for helping me with the idea, so thanks, hun :)

**Also:** thank you **Sesi Braginskaya** for correcting my Russian. Because I'm not Russian, and I don't know the first thing about the Russian language. This is also why I don't usually use Russian or German words in my fanfiction, because unless I have a professional translator who knows what they're doing, I could be saying something wrong. So thanks again~

.

[Posted: 2.5.2013]


	15. Shattered Like Glass

Hi there, welcome to chapter 15 of Broken Rabbit. Enjoy your stay.

* * *

**~January 19th, 2013 - 2pm~**

.

'_Tomorrow then? ... I understand... ... don't worry, I'll take care of it._'

'_... thank you._'

.

After spending a long morning out getting some important things, Ivan returned home. A heavy sigh escaping him once he closed the front door behind him. Part of him couldn't believe what he had just done, and he didn't want to believe it, but as he held a small white envelope in his hands, he was forced to realize it as an awful truth that he couldn't change and just had to accept.

Somehow, he knew it would come to this, regardless of how bad he wished otherwise.

.

He made his way to Gilbert's room upstairs, to check to see if the albino had even woken up yet. The walk was a difficult one, one that had him rethinking everything. He didn't want this, but _his_ wants were not the important ones. He had no right to carry on like this as if nothing had happened, and no right to keep this to himself.  
He spent most of the previous night thinking about what happened with Gilbert yesterday; and then after this morning, after finding the letter that somehow made its way to his home... he simply couldn't keep this up.  
He took a deep breath before knocking gently on Gilbert's bedroom door a few times, and waited for an answer from inside. After a few seconds, a muffled voice said, "Come in." and Ivan took another moment to collect himself before entering.

"Oh, hey Ivan," Gilbert greeted him. He was sitting at the small desk in his room; it seemed he was writing in the small journal that Ivan had given him a few days ago.

"Hi..." Ivan mumbled quietly, smiling forcefully as he walked to the other male after closing the door behind him. His entire demeanor _cried_ of depression.

Gilbert watched the Russian as he walked to him, and closed his little black journal; he instantly noticed that there was something wrong. Ivan's face looked a bit paler than usual, and his eyebrows were furrowing just slightly, like the Russian was trying to hide some sort of pain. The tiny smile on Ivan's face was also a lie; Gilbert could tell that he was forcing the smile to be there.  
"Is everything alright?" Gilbert asked and then scooted his chair away from his desk a little and turned to face the other.

"Everything's fine." Ivan answered, his voice clearly stating otherwise. He noticed that Gilbert was giving him those eyes, the ones that meant he wasn't buying what he was saying at all. "Alright, so there _is_ something wrong, but it's not important; it was just an argument I had with Natalia earlier, no big deal." He lied; he hadn't talked to Natalia, or Sofia, since yesterday morning when he asked them both to leave the house so he could be alone with Gilbert.  
_That_ turned out well.

"Oh? What happened?" Gilbert asked, seeming worried.

"It's nothing to concern yourself with, Gilbert." He said, trying to relief Gilbert of pointless worry, "Regardless, I have something for you." He said, and walked a step closer, holding out the small white envelope from earlier to the other male.

"What is it?" Gilbert asked as he took the paper, and flipped it in different directions as if he was trying to guess what was inside.

"A letter, from your brother, as well as something from me." He said, and put his hands in his pockets, feeling the cold silver ring he still had in there with his fingers, and almost getting teary eyed. It was the gift he _truly_ wanted Gilbert to have, but he couldn't give it to him, not now.

Gilbert's eyes widened when he heard mention of his brother, and quickly began to open the envelope. Ivan's face dropped more, looking utterly broken inside, he could feel something tugging in his chest, and it hurt.

Gilbert slipped out a small piece of paper that looked like it was torn from a notebook, and then noticed that there was something else inside as well. He glanced at it before slipping his fingers inside to take the other slip of paper out.

"What is this...?" he asked cautiously. His pink-ish eyes widening and a lump beginning to form in his throat as he looked over the paper, not believing what he was seeing.

"It's a plane ticket, to Berlin."

.

Ivan silently left Gilbert to himself after that, leaving the man to his thoughts and to read his letter. Gilbert couldn't speak, or even _think_ properly as he held the ticket in front of him, his hand starting to shake. Wasn't he staying here as a servant? No, as Ivan's _boyfriend_. Why would he suddenly give him this like it wasn't a big deal at all? Like Gilbert was _expecting_ this? Why didn't he talk to him about this before?

'_A ticket, to Berlin...? How? ..._**_Why_**_?_' he finally asked to himself. He suddenly remembered the letter, and quickly set the ticket down, and picked up the letter from his brother and read it over. Seeing his brother's handwriting again felt nostalgic in a weird way.  
Ludwig was asking him to come home if he could find a way to get back, and to just forget about getting money to remodel the house because he had moved in the last few days.. He said that he couldn't afford to send money or anything or else he would have, but if Gilbert could ask Ivan to pay...

Gilbert read over the letter a few times, trying to focus himself and trying to wrap his head around just what was happening.

_"A letter, from your brother, as well as something from me."_ Ivan's voice rang in Gilbert's head, and he looked in the envelope again. Nothing.  
So... the ticket, is the 'something' from Ivan...?

Gilbert looked down at the ticket and thought for a few seconds. '_Ivan is getting rid of me...?_' He asked himself. He knew Ludwig was asking for him back, but for Ivan to basically toss him out like this on a whim, didn't he care at all about Gilbert? Or how he felt for him?

Gilbert growled, feeling himself becoming angry about this entire situation. He knew that Ivan was just doing what Ludwig would have wanted and probably what Gilbert wanted as well, but... to do this without asking first, to book him a flight back to Berlin behind his back like he could just make these decisions on his own.  
Gilbert was _not_ okay with this.

.

The albino stormed out of his room, clenching the envelope in his hand tightly. He was angry, and even a bit hurt by this entire thing. He wanted to see his brother, but on his own terms and of his own decision, not because Ivan snuck around and sent him back on a plane.

Gilbert thrust the door to Ivan's office open, letting it slam harshly against the wall behind it. The slam actually spooked Ivan a little, as he jumped a bit in his chair. He wasn't expecting Gilbert to suddenly be there.

"Gilbert? What are you doing-?"

"What am _I_ doing!? I should be asking _you_ that!" he yelled at him, walking to the front of Ivan's desk. "You come home and the first thing you say to me is 'Oh hey, here's a plane ticket, go home.'!?" He shouted, gritting his teeth a little.

"Gilbert, it's not like that-"

"Oh it's _not?_" Gilbert huffed, looking up at the ceiling. "You had no right to plan with my brother to just send me off like this."

"I didn't _plan_ anything. Will you just calm down and let me explain?" Ivan asked, raising his voice a little, acting a bit annoyed by Gilbert's attitude.  
Gilbert didn't reply, and didn't even look at him, which was his way of letting Ivan continue. "I found the letter and it wasn't addressed to you or anything so I opened it thinking it was for me." He explained and leaned back in his chair a little, "I figured you'd _want_ to return home so I went ahead and took care of everything. I also won't be the reason keeping two brothers apart."

Gilbert growled a little, "No one gave you permission to make that decision! You should have asked me first or at least told me after a few days so I would have time to prepare!"

"Permission? I didn't realize I _needed_ permission since you're living here at my expense." He said harshly, but not meaning to, "You have nothing to prepare; you have a suitcase of clothing, if that even." Ivan said, looking down at his desk, becoming a bit more annoyed but secretly feeling his heart breaking into pieces,  
'_This is the best way._' He told himself over and over.

"That's not what I meant, you idiot!" Gilbert shouted, glaring sadly at Ivan, "I wanted some time to say goodbye to everyone if I had to leave..."

"Then say your goodbyes quickly, Gilbert. Your plane leaves tomorrow at noon." Ivan said, scribbling something down on a piece of paper to try to keep himself distracted from crying or looking upset.

Gilbert could literally feel his heart ache when Ivan said those words to him. '_Tomorrow... noon...?_' that was less than 24 hours...  
He felt sadness boil into anger, and he snapped, flinging his hand in front of him and off to the side, which hit an expensive looking blue vase and sent it flying into pieces after shattering against his hand.

"I wanted more time to say goodbye to _you!_" he yelled a final time, and then gripped his hand that hit the vase, finally realizing the pain that was surging through it, and was now dripping blood from it. His eyes began to tear up and he ran out of Ivan's office, crying in sadness and in pain.

After a few minutes of silence and letting the mood settle, Ivan stood up from his chair and began to clean up the shards of glass from the floor, his eyes narrowing a bit from seeing small droplets of blood on his carpet; he never wanted to see the albino's blood again, not after that first night of seeing so much of it.

.

Gilbert went to the bathroom, and pulled out a small shard of glass from his hand and ran the cut under cold water for awhile, his eyes tearing up even more from the stinging it was causing, which just mixed in with actual tears.

He had plenty of time to think about what was happening now. Tomorrow, he'd be back in Germany with his brother for the first time in _years_...  
He wondered how Ludwig was doing these days. If he was healthy and happy. The plan to remodel the house fell through since neither of them had the money to fix it up, and Ludwig had moved as well, and the only reason that Gilbert even went to Russia in the first place was because of a job that promised him money.  
In the end, Ivan wasn't paying him anyway, so maybe it _was_ best for him to go home since there wasn't a point in staying with Ivan; it didn't help either himself or Ludwig... still, he wished he had a little more time, just to say goodbye and cope with the idea of possibly never seeing Ivan again.

After awhile and after the bleeding stopped, Gilbert went to his room and he began to pack some of his stuff into a bag that was kept in his bedroom closet. He packed the clothes that Ivan had bought for him and then set a clean outfit out for tomorrow. After packing, he went back to the bathroom and took a long shower. Still thinking about all of this and crying more. He hated crying. Hadn't he done enough of it lately?

Gilbert ran the water until it was cold, not getting out until his skin stung from the icy water hitting his body. He dried and dressed himself quickly, leaving his hair damp.  
He decided since it was getting late now, he should probably apologize to Ivan for breaking the vase, and still say goodbye while he had the chance...

.

He wandered back up to Ivan's office only to find the door still open. He peeked in and saw Ivan laying face-down on his desk with two empty bottles of vodka to his right, his hair was also ruffled up like he had been messing with it a lot and just gave up on fixing it. Gilbert sighed sadly at the sight and walked in, and gently began shaking Ivan awake. As he did so, he noticed wet spots all over Ivan's desk, which he assumed was vodka that dripped from his mouth once he was to drunk to drink properly.

"I'm awake." Ivan suddenly said after a few moments of Gilbert shaking him. Gilbert instantly stopped and apologized quietly, retracting his hand from Ivan's shoulder.

"It's fine, Gilbert..." Ivan said and sat up, and then looked over to him with tired and heavy eyes. "Why are you here?" he had a small red mark on his forehead from lying on his desk, but it was quickly fading.

"Do you even need to ask?" Gilbert asked, "I'm saying my goodbyes."

Ivan looked away from the other male, "I thought you didn't want to after what happened..."

"I thought so too, but then I realized that I care about you, and leaving here is going to be hard, so I decided to suck it up and stop being a whiny child." Gilbert groaned out, but then placed his hand on the Russian's shoulder after a silent moment, "Please, don't make me spend my last night here alone..." Ivan looked up to him after those words and looked a bit shocked, Gilbert's eyes were wet. He was tearing up again.

The Russian stood up, and kissed Gilbert's forehead softly, "I'm sorry, but if you come to bed with me tonight, I'm not sure what I might do..." Ivan warned, giving more lazy kisses to Gilbert's head, traveling up into his hair and closing his eyes. He noticed that Gilbert's hair was wet, and so he sniffed a little, and smelled a sweet, fruity scent in the albino's hair. He guessed Gilbert had taken a shower after their argument.

Gilbert's eyes narrowed a bit, thoroughly thinking through what Ivan was saying, and took into consideration anything that might happen in Ivan's current state. If they did something tonight, it would just make leaving tomorrow even more difficult...

"I don't care, I want to." Gilbert said honestly, looking up at Ivan.

The Russian sighed and moved back from the other slightly, taking Gilbert's hands into his own. When he did, Gilbert winced a little in pain from his hand, and Ivan noticed this.  
"You haven't even bandaged it up yet..." he said, looking over the reddish cut on the top of Gilbert's hand. He then placed a hand on Gilbert's back and began walking with him, carefully holding his injured hand.

.

Gilbert simply walked with Ivan to wherever he was taking him, which ended up being the bathroom. Ivan let go of Gilbert, and fussed with some stuff in the cabinet under the sink, mumbling something to himself in Russian. He still seemed a bit hazed from drinking two bottles of vodka, but surprisingly, held himself together rather well.  
After a moment, he brought up a bandage, a wrapping, and a bottle of peroxide. He set the bandage and wrapping on the counter and popped the top on the peroxide and then looked at Gilbert, gesturing for him to give the Russian his injured hand. Gilbert did so and let Ivan take his hand, and he then led it over the sink. Ivan held the bottle over Gilbert's hand and let the liquid pour over the cut, and then set the bottle back down. When the liquid on the albino's hand began bubbling up a little, Ivan reached over and grabbed the bandage and stuck it over Gilbert's injury, and then wound the wrapping around and pinned it together so it held firmly in place.

Ivan smiled softly at the bandaged wound and patted it gently, "There. Change it in a few days to check on it." He instructed, looking up at Gilbert as he held the man's hand.

Gilbert frowned a little. The fact that Ivan was telling him this was because he wasn't going to be the one to change it. Ivan was always the one bandaging and changing his wounds, and now... he wasn't sure if he'd ever have a moment like this again.

Though one should refrain from hurting oneself so much.

.

Ivan took Gilbert's healthy hand and led him out of the bathroom, not bothering to clean up after himself. He took the albino back to his bedroom, and instantly led him to the bed. Ivan sat on the edge of the mattress and gave Gilbert a worried look. He wanted the German to stay, but he couldn't make him. He wanted to make him his, but... it would only make it harder tomorrow.  
The Russian sighed heavily, and laid himself down in the bed on his back, and then looked over at Gilbert. "What will you do?" he asked, looking tiredly at him.

Gilbert blinked and hopped up on the bed next to Ivan, "I'm going to sleep with you." He said simply, crawling over Ivan to his other side and laying down. There was a long moment of silence, and it was even a bit awkward feeling as the two just laid there quietly.

Ivan groaned a little, finally getting annoyed with the silence, and suddenly shifted his body and suspended himself above the other and looked down at him. He gently kissed Gilbert's forehead, "I won't have sex with you; I won't put you through that when you have to leave tomorrow, but..." he mumbled, and leaned down to Gilbert's neck. "Can I at least mark you?" He asked, giving the albino's neck a soft kiss.  
It sent a small shiver through Gilbert's body and he turned his head, blushing softly.

Ivan pulled back and looked at the albino, brushing his knuckles along his cheek. "Well, can I?" he asked again. Gilbert shifted his eyes to Ivan and nodded slowly, and Ivan smiled softly at his answer. Ivan then brought Gilbert's injured hand up to his mouth, placing a soft kiss on the top where the cut was before leaning back down and kissing the skin on Gilbert's neck gently.

The kisses became longer, slower and more loving, like Ivan was trying to erase the small scars from the cuts that were healing there. The gestures almost brought Gilbert to tears, and he lifted his hands up and slid them along Ivan's neck, causing the Russian to shiver a bit, and then up into his ash-blonde hair where his fingers tangled in the strands loosely.

Ivan continued but began kissing more roughly and started sucking at Gilbert's flesh, trying to force the blood to the surface. After a moment, he bit down, leaving faint teeth marks in the albino's skin. He pulled back instantly when he heard a small whimper from Gilbert, "Are you okay?" he asked, concern filling his voice and features, thinking he may have hurt the other.

"I'm fine." Gilbert said and ran his fingers through the Russian's hair as if confirming that he was alright. "I promise."

Ivan looked at him for a moment, struck by Gilbert's voice and the feeling in his hair. Smiling, he leaned down and gave Gilbert's pink-ish lips a soft kiss before moving back to his neck.

After a few moments of successfully making his mark, Ivan moved down, unbuttoning the first button of Gilbert's shirt and then waited to see if the other would stop him. After the albino showed no signs of protesting, Ivan continued to Gilbert's collarbone and began a new mark there as well.  
Gilbert began squirming a little under Ivan. He loved the warmth that was surrounding him, and he didn't mind Ivan undoing his shirt, as long as he kept it on he would be fine.

Eventually, Gilbert slid his arms around Ivan's neck, bringing the other closer to him. Ivan smiled softly at this, and simply rested his body down on Gilbert's, being careful not to lay too awkwardly or painfully for either of them, but he did find that one of his legs went between the albino's, fitting their bodies together like two puzzle pieces that felt like they were made just for the other.

.

Both of them lost track of time just lying with each other. Ivan went back to gently kissing Gilbert's neck, not leaving anymore marks than the two he already made. Ivan caressed up and down the albino's pale arms, gently gripping at them as he did, not wanting to let go of him or to stop feeling him. Gilbert had his arms tight around the Russian's shoulders, holding him close so their warmth would be stronger. He kept himself together surprisingly well, not crying or getting panicked. He wasn't too aroused either by the kissing or touching, neither was Ivan for that matter. It seemed irrelevant to be so at this point, and they both knew it would be bad if they were.

So they stayed together like this, their breathing mirroring each other and their hearts almost beating as one. Staying pressed together until they fell asleep one final time in each others embrace.

* * *

You all have permission to shoot me now.

**Just to clear up some confusion:** This is **NOT** the last chapter.

.

[Posted: 2.8.2013]


	16. Home

Yay for chapter 16 being finished~

Enjoy~

* * *

**~January 20th, 2013~**

.

Gilbert was woken up in Ivan's bed this morning by Sofia smiling softly at him, but she also had undertones of sadness shining in her baby blue eyes.  
She knew what was going on. Ivan had told her and Natalia earlier in the day before she woke Gilbert up, and she felt awful about it. She really thought this would work out, but Gilbert had a life back in Germany, and a brother who was missing him terribly. Sofia couldn't imagine someone keeping her own brother from her, so she had to accept that the German was leaving them, even if she knew her brother would most likely fall into a pit of depression very soon.  
Speaking of Ivan, the Russian was nowhere to be found. Sofia said that he had gone out early in the morning after explaining to her and Natalia what was happening and that he hadn't returned for hours. Apparently, the last thing he said to her was to wake Gilbert up and to drive him to the airport and make sure he gets on his plane, and Natalia was to remain inside and not hurt Gilbert for any reason. Sofia was worried, but she trusted her brother not to do anything brash; but then again, Ivan wasn't exactly known for his exceptional self-control.

Now, Gilbert stood by the front door of the mansion he had become so familiar with in such a short time; not moving, not asking questions, and barely even breathing. He was there with Sofia and Natalia. Sofia was dressed in a black, nice looking wool jacket that barely touched her thighs. It was buckled together in the front by silver buckles with a strap that tightened and tied around her waist. Tight blue jeans and brown ankle-hi boots finished off her outfit, as well as some thin black gloves. Natalia wore a similar dress to the ones that she was often seen wearing. Black and white with long sleeves and a black lacy bow tying around her waist, the bow showing in the back, and the skirt reaching just above her ankles where cute black flats were on her feet, as well as white tights on her legs. Both sisters were wearing very different expressions as well.  
Natalia looked pissed off to high heaven, crossing her arms over her chest and not once breaking the glare she had aimed at Gilbert like a trained sniper on their target. Sofia stood closer to Gilbert, acting almost as a shield, and looked back and forth between her clearly upset sister and the albino with them.

Natalia finally broke the silence with an extremely annoyed tut. "You should just leave. He _isn't_ going to see you off." She scoffed and then turned away; walking down the hall and mumbling something about how she knew Gilbert would hurt Ivan. She couldn't stand to be in the presence of the man who made Ivan cry.

Sofia sighed, "Perhaps we should leave..." she suggested in agreement with her sister as she looked over to Gilbert. The albino stayed silent, as he just couldn't bring himself to speak at the moment. Sofia's eyes saddened more as she looked at the man standing with her. He looked so lost, so confused, and so broken.

She walked closer to him and gently took his hand into hers. "Let's go, hun. We can't stand here forever, as much as I wish we could." She said. Gilbert looked at her, his eyes hanging sadly. He gave a weak nod and leaned down to grab his small bag that had been sitting at his feet, throwing it over his shoulder and then letting Sofia lead him out the front door.

.

The winter air outside was fresh and clean, and smelled nice. It would have been a beautiful day had it not been for what was happening. Sofia took a moment to breathe in before she opened the door to her small black car, unlocking the passengers' side for Gilbert once she was in.

"You can put your bag in the back, Gilbert." She said after the albino sat in his seat with his bag on his lap. He simply shook his head and buckled his seatbelt, and then huddled his bag close to his abdomen.

Sofia gave him another sad look and then checked all of her mirrors and buckled her seatbelt before starting the engine. She waited a few minutes for the car to warm up before backing out from the driveway. She kept her eyes focused on the road and tried not to look at Gilbert, but she couldn't help but see him from the corner of her eye. He was staring out the window, his head turning in sync with the car as it turned out of the driveway, not taking his pink-ish eyes off of the mansion he felt like he would never step foot in again.

Suddenly, just as they began driving away, Gilbert gasped and pressed himself closer to the window, not believing what he was seeing. On the hill where the mansion was, there was a figure standing off to the side in a small clearing with the tails of a long scarf blowing in random directions from its body. The figure was slowly waving its hand at its side. Gilbert felt his heart drop as well as tears that began rolling down his face, and he accidentally cried out Ivan's name in a soft whisper.

Sofia heard Gilbert's voice and she looked over at him, nearly crying herself. "I guess he did see you off after all." She mumbled, and continued to drive down the road. Gilbert didn't break eye-contact with the figure until Sofia turned off onto the main road and the man was out of his view.

.

Once they were pretty far from the house, Sofia sighed softly and decided to try to strike up a conversation to break the heavy silence that had held them for long enough. "So, are you excited to see your brother again?"

Her voice knocked Gilbert from his thoughts, "Huh? Oh, yeah yeah. I am." He said, surprisingly having heard her at all.

"What's he like?" Sofia asked, smiling softly and trying to bring the mood up. She was about to ask if he was anything like Ivan, but figured it be best to leave her brother's name out of it for now.

"He's pretty quiet, and shyer around people, but he's always been smart and skilled at stuff like cooking. He also loves teasing me, but no one ever sees that side of him." He said. "I haven't seen him in years, and only talked to him for a few minutes, so I don't really know how he's doing now..." he said, and remembered that in Ludwig's letter he mentioned something about having moved.

"I see. Well, be sure to say hello to him for me." Sofia said, smiling a bit toward Gilbert. "And tell him that it was nice having you with us."

Gilbert turned his head to her and blinked curiously, "It was...?" he asked, seeming a bit baffled, considering his presence was something most seemed to dislike.

"Of course. You brought a certain light into our home that I haven't seen in years, a warmth as well." She said, smiling a bit more, "Even if Natalia has her issues with you, I enjoyed talking to you, even if it wasn't much."

Gilbert stared at Sofia as she continued driving. Somehow, she brought a tiny smile to his face, albeit a sad one, but still a smile nonetheless, and he mumbled a quiet 'thanks'.

.

Sofia continued on, and after about a half hour of driving, they arrived at the airport. The Russian turned off the engine and looked over to Gilbert, letting out a breathy exhale. "Well, this is it." She said.

Gilbert looked out the window at all the people walking by; some rushing down the sidewalk as others just sat by peacefully and talked with friends and family. "Yeah, I guess it is."

Sofia took the initiative and stepped out of the car first, walking around and actually opening Gilbert's door for him. "Come on, hun. You can't miss your flight." She said.

'_Sure I can._' Was Gilbert's first thought, but he nodded and reluctantly got out of the car and walked with the Russian.

It seemed like forever just waiting, and Sofia seemed to take care of everything, and before he knew it, the dreaded moment came where he was supposed to step onto the plane.

"Gilbert, I want to say something to you before you leave." Sofia said suddenly and took hold of both of the albino's hands. Gilbert simply looked at her curiously, his silence a sign of letting her continue. "I wasn't going to say anything because I didn't want to bother you, but... even though you weren't with us for very long, I really appreciate how much you opened up to us all, especially after what happened to you..." she said, and then shook her head, becoming distracted, "My point is, you became like family in a few days, and I personally have to thank you." She stopped for a moment and took a deep breath. "For the first time in years, I saw a genuine smile on Ivan's face because he had you, not as a lover, but he was just happy that you were healthy and actually seemed to like him." She said, and sighed a bit. "He was so worried you weren't even going to wake up..."

Gilbert listened to her every word, and found himself nearly crying, and he suddenly pulled Sofia into a tight hug, not caring if he was squishing her boobs, even though it was painful, for him. "Thank you, for everything..." he mumbled softly and then pulled back from the smaller woman, "Would you do me a favor?" he asked, and Sofia nodded, actually wiping some tears away from under her baby blue eyes.  
"Give this to Ivan when you see him." He said, and cupped Sofia's cheek and placed a soft kiss to the other side of her face and then pulled away.

Sofia's face turned a light pink and she smiled brightly, "I will, don't worry." She nodded, her eyes watering a bit more.

Gilbert let go of the Russian and sighed heavily, "Well, I should probably get going now." He said and turned away from her. "It's been fun, Sofia. Oh, and just for the hell of it, tell Natalia that I'll miss her too, even if she almost slit my throat."

Sofia laughed softly and nodded, "I will, Gilbert. You take care, okay hun?" she said.

Gilbert nodded and started walking away, "Yeah yeah, you too. Take care of that big bear for me." He said, waving backward as he walked away from her. He tried to hide it, but he felt his voice catch in his throat and his eyes welling up and burning a little as tears fell and rolled down his cheeks. The woman at the desk probably thought he was crazy or something, but he didn't care, and he walked through and boarded the plane. His legs felt like jelly and shook as he walked and even as he sat down, but as much as he was sad to leave, he knew that Sofia would take care of Ivan. He knew the man would need all the comfort in the world soon.

.

.

Gilbert opened his eyes, and they actually hurt from being tired. There was a hand on his arm, gently shaking him away, which belonged to a pretty blonde woman standing next to him. "Sir, we're landing soon." She said and then walked away. Gilbert blinked a few more times and realized where he was. On a plane that was probably somewhere close to Berlin, and he had spent the last hour or so sleeping, already dreaming of this morning. He felt like crap, to put it kindly, and his disgusted groaning and grumbling was a great indication to that. He tried his best to look happier, but he just couldn't, his mouth seemed to just naturally curve into a frown without him even meaning it to.

After a few minutes of being trapped in a crowd, he finally made his way out into a big lobby of people, some holding signs and other embracing loved ones, and the occasional screaming child. It all seemed to bother Gilbert, even the _air_ seemed to piss him off, and he wasn't sure why.

Okay that was a lie, he knew exactly why, but he sure as hell wasn't about to admit it.

The albino looked around, wondering if his brother had come to greet him. He kind of had to, since Gilbert had no idea where Ludwig now lived. After a moment, he saw a tall blonde man leaning back against a pillar, his arms folded across his chest and his hair hanging down in his face. At first Gilbert didn't think it was him since Ludwig had always slicked back his hair with an _ungodly_ amount of gel, but he noticed that identical silver cross hanging outside of his jacket. The moment his eyes landed on it, he felt something rise in him, like his heart swelling. '_I'm home..._' he said to himself, and then ran toward the man, actual tears welling up in his eyes.

"Ludwig!" he yelled out as he neared the man, dodging some people and actually jumping over a small square seat that he didn't feel like walking around. The man looked up from the ground and he saw the albino running toward him and he pushed himself off of the pillar and smiled so incredibly warmly, opening his arms just in time for the shorter man to literally leap into his arms, throwing his own around the blonde man's neck. Gilbert tightened his arms around his brother, and his watery eyes began to drip. Little streams of tears rolled down his cheeks, but were quickly soaked up by the other German's coat.

After a moment of the embrace, Gilbert finally pulled back from the other and looked up at him, not yet caring that Ludwig seemed to grow another inch or so taller in the last two years.  
He couldn't really speak, just small mutters and strange squeaky sounds came from his throat and Ludwig laughed a little, and began wiping at his older brother's face, still smiling softly.

"It's good to see you again, Gilbert." Ludwig finally said after a long moment, and ruffled his brother's hair playfully. The gesture seemed to completely change the albino's mood, as he reacted by groaning and pouting a little.

"It's good to see you too." Gilbert replied, smiling a bit. "I'm not even going to talk about how you got _taller_." He said, with a touch of sarcasm in his voice.

"Good. Then I won't have to talk about the hickey on your neck." Ludwig retorted, raising a teasing eyebrow at the other male. Even though he was actually curious since the mark looked fresh and dark, he also wondered who gave it to him...

Gilbert wasn't expecting such a snide comeback from his brother, and he stuttered over himself, his cheeks flushing up in embarrassment. He slapped his hand over the mark to hide it, even though it was plainly obvious and the other had already noticed it.

Ludwig chuckled a bit and then took Gilbert's bag that he was carrying. "Calm down, you can tell me later." He said.

Gilbert literally flinched back, giving Ludwig an almost terrified look. "Why do I have to tell you anything!?" he shouted, causing a few nearby people to stare at them strangely. Ludwig didn't give a reply other than a soft chuckle as he began walking toward the exit of the airport. Gilbert had no choice but to follow, grumbling in embarrassment as he tailed after his brother.

Outside, Gilbert followed Ludwig to his vehicle. "Still have this beat up truck, huh?" Gilbert said as Ludwig and himself approached a familiar blue truck in the parking lot not too far from the exit. Surprisingly the truck still looked pretty nice, even after all these years. Gilbert waited for Ludwig to unlock the doors and he hopped in once he did.

"Yeah, it still runs good. I've fixed it up a bit since you've been gone." Ludwig said and started the engine, it roared loudly and the sound made Gilbert smile a little in nostalgia. Ludwig pulled out of the parking lot and out onto a main road and began driving to his apartment. "So, about that hickey..." Ludwig hinted teasingly, not taking his eyes off of the road. He smiled slightly when he heard his brother groan, and heard the rustling of his clothes as he turned away from him.

Gilbert slumped into his seat, crossing his arms over his chest and huffing. Could he just tell Ludwig about Ivan and himself? What would he think about them...?  
After a moment, Gilbert sighed and just gave in. "It's from Ivan." He said, turning his face away in embarrassment.

"The man who saved you?" Ludwig asked, "I guess I could see why... he has taken very good care of you, and you were always easily impressed." He joked.

"Oh shut up."

"I'm happy for you though. I'm glad that in your time of need, someone helped you when I couldn't be there." Ludwig said. "I talked to him on the phone, and he seems like a nice guy." Ludwig smiled softly, turning onto another street.

"You don't think it's, I dunno, weird or anything?" Gilbert asked, looking over to his brother.

"Because he's a guy? No." Ludwig said, shaking his head a little. "The weirdest thing is us talking about a hickey you have."

Gilbert smiled a little, but then grinned, "Want to know something more awkward?" he asked.

"Probably not." The blonde replied.

"I have another one."

Ludwig groaned out a little. "Please don't show me."

The albino laughed softly, "Relax, it's just on my collarbone." He said, actually rubbing at the mentioned area. "We had a bit of a fight yesterday when I found out I was coming home... but I didn't want to leave on bad terms, so I slept with him." Gilbert said, looking out the window.

"Wonderful, Gilbert, I'm sure that solved all of your issues." The blonde said nonchalantly, sighing softly.

"Wait- I didn't mean-" Gilbert literally slammed his hand over his face, "I didn't mean _sleep_ with him. I didn't mean actual sexual intercourse, alright?"

"Right."

"No I'm serious, Ludwig, I swear I didn't."

"Okay."

This went on for quite a while and simply ended with Gilbert utterly embarrassed and worried that Ludwig seriously thought his older brother slept with a man after such a short amount of time. Oh, but Ludwig knew the truth anyway, he just wanted to mess with his brother since it had been forever since he last did so. So eventually inside the truck became silent with a slightly awkward atmosphere the rest of the way home.

* * *

Ludwig teases his brother a lot, yes. OCC, I know, but I don't care-*SHOT*

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed. Thanks for reading~


	17. Broken Rabbit

Hiya, welcome to chapter 17.  
I hope you guys enjoy this one. It's also my longest chapter so far, so hopefully it isn't full of fail ^^'

Enjoy~

* * *

**~March 22th, 2013~  
**[2 months later...]

.

Ludwig's apartment was nicer than Gilbert had first expected it to be. Two bedrooms and a nice kitchen area. The living room was pretty nice as well. Gilbert had found a new job working in a factory where he just packed boxes and stood on his feet for 8 hours a day. It wasn't exactly a luxurious lifestyle but it paid well and it kept Ludwig and Gilbert fed. Ludwig moved because he couldn't afford to live at his other home since that hyper Italian guy left, and he helped pay for things while they were roommates, but it seems Feliciano's brother had some sort of problem back in Italy, so he had to go home to him. Gilbert figured that seeing Feliciano return to his brother made Ludwig want his own brother back as well. Either way, Gilbert wasn't complaining. He liked being home, it was nice to be with his brother and see a few people that he hadn't seen in years. Though, sometimes he found himself thinking of when he was back in Russia. He would wonder about how Ivan was doing now, and if he was alright. Did Sofia and Natalia take good care of him after he left? Was he... even still _alive?_ The thinking drove him insane every now and then and sometimes he would do things like accidentally slice his finger when chopping up vegetables or burn food while he was lost in a trance of thoughts; it wasn't often that this happened, but when it did, Ludwig was always there to knock him back to reality and get him to focus again.

.

It had been a crappy day for Gilbert. It was raining for one thing so it just made everything cold and damp and overall not enjoyable, but he was also sick. It started as a small cold about a week ago, nothing more than a runny nose and maybe a cough here and there, but it eventually developed into a fever that had his temperature rising more each day. Still though, he had to work so he sucked it up and forced himself to continue pushing on. Ludwig had tried to get him to take a vacation week off so he could rest, but the stubborn albino insisted that he was fine, even though in the past week he had lost his balance several times and almost ran into a few things from being so disoriented.

Ludwig was always home from work about an hour before Gilbert, and he was just getting ready to prepare a meal for his brother and himself; something that would be both easy for Gilbert's raw throat to swallow and also gentle on his queasy stomach. It had been about a week since Gilbert caught his cold but luckily Ludwig was practically immune to getting sick, as it was extremely rare for him.

After about 15 minutes passed 3pm, Gilbert finally came stumbling through the door with his head hanging down. He was wet from the rain outside, and he just looked pretty awful in general. Ludwig stepped out of the kitchen area and down a small step and over to his brother and actually helped him out of his soaked coat. "Why don't you go take a hot bath and I'll bring some soup to your room afterward." Ludwig suggested as he slid the albino's coat off of his arms. Gilbert simply nodded and shrugged his shoulders out of his jacket. "That way you can get some rest as soon as you eat." Gilbert nodded in agreement, trudging himself off to the bathroom as Ludwig smiled softly at him. Really, his brother should learn to take it easy before he hurts himself. At least today is Friday, so Gilbert can take the weekend to just relax and get some sleep and hopefully recover his health by Monday morning.

.

Gilbert locked the bathroom door behind him and went to the tub and turned the water on. While it wasn't as big as the one at Ivan's house, it was still comfortable for one person, and actually made Gilbert feel strangely safe in the smaller confined area. Once the bath was full of steamy hot water, he stripped himself of his other clothes until nothing but his silver cross hung between his collarbones. The marks Ivan had made had faded about a week or so after they were made and not a trace of them remained now. All that was left was the scar on his chest; the seemingly only proof that what happened in Moscow did _indeed_ actually happen. Even the cut on his hand from the vase he broke was gone.

He lowered his frail body into the tub, sighing and leaning back as the heat from the water washed over him and soothed his muscles. He tried his best to relax but it proved harder than expected. His thoughts kept wandering to Ivan, and after a while his thoughts weren't even about if Ivan was still alive and healthy, but rather, if he had moved on. What if he had already forgotten about Gilbert or maybe found someone new? The thought of Ivan being with another person made Gilbert more upset than the thought of being forgotten by him did. He felt like Ivan was _his_, that they _belonged_ to each other and just the idea of another person being touched and loved by Ivan was maddening. After all, Ivan marked him as his own, so he couldn't possibly forget about him, right? Ivan's embrace was something that Gilbert missed dearly, and even though he tried, Ludwig was sadly not a sufficient stand-in for the Russian.

He was only with Ivan for 9 days, but in those 9 days, Ivan had done so much more than just save and get Gilbert back on his feet. He made him fall so _deeply_ in love with him, and now Gilbert's biggest regret was not truly realizing it until Ivan was far out of his reach, and never having a chance to tell the Russian properly.

He couldn't believe that two months later he was thinking about this now. He had been doing such a good job with keeping his head clear too: going out drinking with Ludwig and even going to a club and dancing. He had gotten his life back, the life that he wanted to create for his brother and himself after he returned from Russia. That was the plan, to go to Russia and make a good amount of money, and then come home and help Ludwig with the house and continue on living like a normal family. None of this was expected. Not at all.

Gilbert began to finally wash himself, pouring some transparent orangey colored shampoo into his hands and then running them through his wet snow-white hair gently. He was starting to feel a bit better now and just enjoyed the feeling of massaging his scalp and the warm water surrounding him. After a moment of soaping up his hair, he slid down and dunked his head under the water and shook his head around a bit before ruffling his hair free of the suds. He brought his head back up out of the water and his hair stuck straight down in and around his face. He repeated the same method with the conditioner and by time he had washed it from his hair, the entire bathroom smelled strongly of citrus fruit. It was a pleasant smell, and he actually began debating if he'd rather smell like delicious fruit or pretty flowers. After all, with two girls in the house before, the only shampoo Ivan ever bought was a tad bit girly; but _damn_ did it smell good and make his hair soft.  
He kind of missed that girly shampoo.

The albino washed the rest of his body and pulled the plug in the tub so that the water could drain out. He carefully stepped over the edge and held onto a nearby towel rack to keep himself from falling since he felt a bit lightheaded from standing up after sitting for so long. He poked around at the scar on his chest after looking in the mirror; it had become a bit of a routine of his that every time he took a bath or shower he'd look and poke at the scar. There wasn't any reason or need to anymore since it had healed a long time ago and just felt a bit rough, but he could still remember the day he woke up and felt his body just aching, and the day Ivan helped him dress, or the time Ivan changed his bandages, and the day when Ivan told him he didn't have to wear the bandage around his chest anymore and kissed the developing scar...

'_Dammit..._' Gilbert mentally swore as he dried himself off, '_why can't I get you out of my head...?_' His mind was starting to work against him again and it seems that ever since he got sick, the subtlest things would remind him of Ivan, and now he wanted the Russian to take care of him like he used to. He remembered the night when he broke down and Ivan came to see him in the bathroom and how gentle and cautious Ivan had been. That entire night was special and he was beginning to wish that he had Ivan with him right now to help him dry, dress, and comfort him like he had before.

Angrily, Gilbert went to a clothes basket in the bathroom that held some clean clothes. Not feeling like overheating himself from his fever, he just grabbed a pair of his black boxers and slid them on, throwing his damp towel over a hamper.

.

He stepped out of the bathroom nearly 2 hours after he went in and looked toward the kitchen. Ludwig was still there and he was just bringing out a can from the food cabinet. He looked at Gilbert, and didn't seem at all phased by the fact that the albino was in his underwear. It wasn't the first time Gilbert dressed like this; in fact, most of this week consisted of Gilbert walking around shirtless or just in his underwear when he was home. Ludwig didn't mind since he guessed it helped Gilbert feel better, but he didn't like seeing the scar across the albino's chest; it just reminded him that he wasn't there for his older brother when he needed him the most and he partially blamed himself since it was his fault Gilbert even went to Russia in the first place.

Ludwig ignored his thoughts, however, and smiled a bit to his brother. "Why don't you go lay down? I'll bring your soup to you in about 10 minutes, as well as a cold cloth." He said, moving the can from before to the side, and bringing out a can opener.

Gilbert nodded in agreement, "I will soon." He said, "Are you still feeling alright?" Gilbert asked, just wanting to have a conversation. He hadn't been speaking much to his brother at all. Between sleeping all day, working, and being too exhausted to talk, he found himself missing out on bonding time with his brother in the last week and he didn't like it very much.

"I'm fine, Gilbert." Ludwig said, nodding a bit. "Just make sure you get your rest, we can't have your fever getting any worse than it is..." he said, twisting the handle on the can opener so it sliced the lid along the edge.

Gilbert sighed and gave up, realizing that Ludwig wouldn't talk much for the sake of Gilbert's wellbeing. "Alright, I'll see you tomorrow morning, or whenever I wake up." He said, and coughed a bit, his throat dry and raw. He turned and trudged toward his room.

Ludwig smiled sadly and thought to himself, '_I'll have to bring him some water too._' and poured the contents of the can into a bowl he had set out.

.

Gilbert didn't bother turning on a light since the clouded sun from outside was filling the room a bit, nor did he do anything else and just flopped down on the mattress. He crawled up toward his pillow and snuggled his face into it, enjoying the coolness against his burning skin. After a moment, he grabbed onto his blanket and pulled it in a bunch up to his face, nuzzling into that as well, curling his legs up in front of him and looking like a little ball of sickness. His breathing had become more of shallow pants and his mouth was hanging open a bit. After a moment, he rolled over onto his back, kicked his blanket off and spread all of his limbs out, trying to take in as much coldness the room and bed had to offer him, but it seemed his body heat just defeated everything. Even though he was wearing nothing except boxers, he still felt like he was on fire. He just hoped Ludwig would hurry with that cold cloth; it sounded like heaven to have anything cold pressed against his body right now. He just felt like he needed a blanket of snow dumped on him.

.

Ludwig continued to work on the meal for his sick brother. Waiting for the soup to finish cooking and letting it cool for about 5 minutes. He left to the bathroom as the soup cooled to get a cloth and wetted it down with ice water, and then twisted it a bit to wring out the excess water so it wouldn't drip all over Gilbert. Though he'd probably enjoy cold water being dripped on him, but it was better to keep things dry.

The blonde knocked gently on Gilbert's bedroom door and then entered, walking over to the pale man who was spread out on his mattress. His eyebrows furrowed a bit; if Gilbert wasn't sick, Ludwig would have thought he looked rather amusing in his strange position. "I brought you your cloth." Ludwig said and sat on the edge of Gilbert's bed and held the cloth in his hand. The albino opened his eyes, and looked to his brother, his eyes thanking him. Ludwig smiled softly and placed the folded cloth over Gilbert's forehead, and Gilbert instantly sighed in relief.

"Do you have like, 10 of these that I can just cover every part of my body with?" the albino asked, looking up at his brother with a tired grin. Sadly, he wasn't joking either. He was seriously about to jump out his window and stand in the cold rain for a few minutes. Though that probably wasn't a good idea for him to do, for a few reasons.

"Sorry Gil, you're just going to have to survive with one." He said as he stood up. He pulled the albino's blanket up and laid it down gently over the pale man's body, tucking him in a little even. "I'll be back with your soup in a few minutes, alright?" he asked as he walked out of the room, leaving Gilbert's door open a crack.

Gilbert sighed, and pulled the cold cloth down over his eyes, and snuggled into his blanket and pillow. Surprisingly, he felt comfortable for the first time in a while.

.

Back in the kitchen, Ludwig went to work on his next project for Gilbert and grabbed a glass from the cupboard and put some ice cubes in it before filling it with cold water. He opened another cabinet above the sink and took out some medicine tablets and dropped one into the water, letting it dissolve completely.

Just as he was about to grab the bowl of cooled soup and glass of water and head back to Gilbert, someone knocked at the door. Ludwig sighed a bit, guessing it was their neighbor who had been borrowing things like random tools lately, so he went to the door and opened it until the small metal chain stopped the door from opening any further.

He saw a face unfamiliar to him and he looked up at the man. He was tall, and seemed pretty large. His hair was fairly long, shaggy and seemed blonde, but looked darker due to the rain that was falling heavier now. "Can I help you?" Ludwig asked, blinking strangely up at the man in front of him.

"Yes, I'm looking for Gilbert Beil- uh, Beilschmidt." He said, having a bit of trouble pronouncing his last name, and actually looking a bit embarrassed for it.

"For Gil? Why?" Ludwig asked, looking over the man curiously, catching his accent. "Are you from his work? I'm sorry if he hasn't been doing a good job lately. He's been sick with a fever for-"

"He's sick?" the man interrupted Ludwig, his face turning rather serious and sounding utterly worried. "I see... well, I probably shouldn't bother him then." He said, looking glum, and turned to walk away.

"Wait." Ludwig said, and caused the other to stop. He leaned closer to the crack of the door, "Who are you?" he asked, finally getting too curious about why the man looked so worried.

The other man sighed and turned his head to look at the other, "I'm sorry, forgive me. I'm Ivan Braginski, the man that Gilbert stayed with in Moscow." He said.

Suddenly it hit Ludwig like a truck as he connected the voice to the name, and now to the face, and he actually stuttered over himself a bit to find a response. "I'm sorry; I didn't recognize your voice at all. Please hold on a second." He said, and Ivan nodded as Ludwig shut the door to unlock the chain and opened it again. "Please come in, and take off your coat."

"No no, I don't plan on staying long, especially since Gilbert's sick..." Ivan said, much to his dismay, and stayed outside.

"What? No, no please stay until the rain stops. If not that, then stay for Gilbert. I'm sure he'd love to see you." Ludwig said, looking sadly at the other man.

Ivan sighed heavily, and gave in under the look the other was giving him and entered the small apartment. Really, Gilbert's brother was just like him, able to get a lot by just a look and some small words. He began to undo his coat and slid it off of his arms as he was previously instructed. Ludwig then took the man's coat and hung it up on a rack by the door. "So... what brings you to Berlin? If I may ask."

"Honestly? I'm not sure." Ivan started, "I wanted to see Gilbert, but the entire way here I felt worse and worse, like maybe my sudden appearance would ruin the life he had gotten back..." Ivan said, sighing again and glancing around the apartment a little. He actually liked how cozy the small apartment felt, and it seemed like a place Gilbert would live; it fit his personality somehow.

"Not at all. Gilbert thinks about you quite a bit, and our life is nothing special." The German said, smiling softly. "I don't know what happened between you and my brother, but I've never seen Gil so worried about someone before, and I can tell that you're important to him, so please, at least stay for a while."

"You said he's sick. I don't want to bother him..." Ivan mumbled a bit, still feeling like he was intruding but all he truly wanted was to see the albino. Ivan had become a complete wreck after Gilbert left, and it became too much for even his sisters to handle. Things got bad for him, but he supposed it was his own fault for letting himself fall so low.

"I promise you're not bothering him. He's been pretty distant ever since he got sick, but even before this he would sometimes get lost in a trance and mention your name. He'll want to see you regardless of how he feels." Ludwig said, looking to the other man and then walking over to the kitchen area again. "I was just getting ready to bring him some soup and water when you knocked, would you mind taking it to him for me?" Ludwig said, smiling at the other a little.

Ivan blinked a few times at the German and went up to the counter. "You're sure it's alright?" he asked.

Ludwig nodded, "Just make sure he eats it, and drinks all the water too. He hasn't been eating or drinking much lately and I'm getting worried, but he insists he's fine. He might listen to you more than me." He said, pushing the bowl of soup and the water toward the other.

The comment actually made the Russian chuckle lightly, and then he picked up the bowl and glass. "I'm not so sure about that; he can be pretty stubborn."

"Sorry you had to experience him." Ludwig joked a bit about his brother, and then leaned onto the counter. "Anyway, his room is just down the hall; last door on the left." Ludwig said, pointing to said hall that was to his right.

Ivan nodded and slowly turned to walk toward the hall, but then Ludwig remembered something, "Oh, and just so you know, he's not wearing anything other than his underwear. His fever has been making him really warm, so..." he said, just giving the Russian a warning.

Ivan smiled sweetly back at the other male, "Oh don't worry, I've seen him in less." He said and continued walking. His comment left Ludwig wide-eyed and looking rather confused and even a bit terrified, like he had been told something disturbing. That's just something you probably shouldn't say to the brother of someone who you've seen naked.

.

Ivan walked up to the door that Ludwig directed him to, noticing that it hadn't been latched all the way. He took a deep breath and could feel his heart beating roughly, and then gently nudged it open with his arm and stepped into the dark room, and his eyes aimed directly toward the bed and he saw the sight that he had been just _dying_ to see, his heart swelling up a bit: Gilbert lying there peacefully on his back. He swore that he felt like he was going to cry just from seeing Gilbert like this. The Russian nudged the door shut and it made a small _click_ as it latched; luckily it didn't bother Gilbert at all, as it still seemed like he was sound asleep.  
Ivan walked to the side of the bed and set the bowl and glass down on the end table, and then took a moment to just watch Gilbert's chest rise and fall as he breathed in and out calmly. He didn't look any different from what Ivan remembered; his hair was still short and shagged messily in a way that looked attractive on him, colored a beautiful snow-white that matched his eyebrows and eyelashes, and his skin almost like porcelain. He looked like an angel, and in many ways he actually was. Ivan owed him so much; so much more than he could ever repay and he doubted that Gilbert would ever truly understand just what he had done for him.  
Ivan's eyes saddened and began welling up a little, and he leaned down and suddenly pressed his lips to the albino's cheek softly. His action didn't go unnoticed by Gilbert though, as he shifted a bit, and made some sort of confused grunt.

"Ludwig?" He mumbled out, "What are you doing?" he said, and touched his cheek where he had been kissed.

Ivan smiled, and gently stroked his knuckles across the back of the albino's hand. "Sorry Rabbit, it's not Ludwig." He finally said.

Without another second passing, Gilbert quickly used his other hand to push the wet cloth up off of his forehead, snapping his eyes open to see the sight of the Russian smiling softly down at him. "Ivan?" '_What..._' "Wh- how?" he mumbled out incoherently. '_Why are you here...?_' He blinked rapidly for a few seconds as if to confirm the sight, and Ivan's smile stayed in place. He felt his heartbeat beginning to quicken, and he felt almost like he was going to faint. He just couldn't believe that Ivan was really standing right next to him so suddenly and without warning. It was just, impossible...

Ivan wasn't sure where to start, so he started with the truth. "I wanted to see you." He said, kneeling down to the side of Gilbert's bed and began stroking the other's snow-white hair softly. "I know it's sudden and your brother said you're sick, so I'll make this quick. I just really needed to see your face. I needed to know you were still healthy, at least for the most part." He said and sighed after a moment of silence, figuring the other wasn't going to reply, "I know I haven't tried to call or send anything to you, but I figured you wouldn't want anything to do-" At that moment, Gilbert sat up and hugged tightly around the Russian's neck, and he actually began to sob quietly. Ivan froze for a moment, surprised by Gilbert's action, and then moved up and sat on the bed so it would be more comfortable for Gilbert, and he gently placed his hands on Gilbert's bare back. He was burning up, and it was sad just to feel this sort of heat coming from Gilbert. After a moment, Ivan wrapped his arms tight around the smaller man, one arm up around his back and the other lower around his waist, pulling him a bit closer.

Gilbert didn't say anything, but his hands gripped at the fabric of Ivan's shirt tightly. The Russian's still wet ash-blonde hair also stuck to the side of Gilbert's face; speaking of which, Ivan's hair had gotten a bit longer since Gilbert last saw him. He probably didn't care to cut it. Gilbert was still crying, and Ivan held the frail man closer to him and hushed him quietly and soothingly, whispering things like "it's alright" into his ear and stroking his hands gently up and down the others back. It seemed to work a bit, as Gilbert's body, which had been shaking lightly up until this moment, relaxed against Ivan. The grip Gilbert had on Ivan also loosened a little as well.

After a moment, Ivan pulled back from the other and brushed some of the albino's hair from his face. "You should eat; Ludwig told me that you haven't been eating much lately."

"I'm fine, really. He's so worried for-" Gilbert stopped when he noticed the non-believing look on Ivan's face. "Erm... I guess I _could_ eat something..." he said a bit nervously.

"Good. I didn't really want to have to force you to eat." Ivan chuckled, picking up the bowl and handing it to Gilbert as the other man sat up against the headboard behind him. Gilbert gave the other a strange but amused look as he carefully took the bowl into his hands, and then took a spoonful of it into his mouth. Ivan smiled and sat next to him, leaning back against the headboard as well, watching the man eat.

The albino glanced over at Ivan and then smiled softly, "How's Sofia and Natalia?" he asked and took another bite.

"Good, I would imagine." Ivan replied, and then looked away rather quickly, his mood dropping instantly, and it didn't go unnoticed by Gilbert.

The albino set his bowl in his lap with his hands still around it. "What?" he asked as he looked to the other male.

"I haven't seen either of them in a month." He said, and Gilbert's eyes widened at the statement. Ivan looked over at the other male and noticed that he was giving him that look; concern and a desire to know more melting together in those pink-ish blue irises. He sighed heavily and looked down at his hands. "About a week after you left, I started drinking more than usual. Sofia tried her best to stop me and make me realize what I was doing was wrong, but I was stubborn and stupid. And I got violent." He said, pausing for a moment. "One night when I was a bit too deep in my cups, I hit her and made her cry. After that, Natalia got pissed at me and hit me as well. A few days later, Natalia took Sofia away with her to an apartment they had rented behind my back, and just left me alone." He explained, feeling completely deserving of the abandonment.

Gilbert sighed breathlessly and looked down at the nearly empty bowl in his lap. "I'm sorry." He apologized, feeling a bit at fault.

Ivan shook his head and forced a soft smile, leaning over and stroking along Gilbert's cheek softly. "Don't be. You didn't do anything wrong." He assured him, speaking nothing but the truth in a sincere tone. "I came here to see you because I was alone, and I needed to know if at least someone still cared about me." He said, sighed a bit.

"You big oaf." Gilbert mumbled lowly. "Did you really think that once I crossed into Germany I'd magically forget everything you've done?" He asked toward Ivan, who was giving him a slightly shocked look that was also a bit ashamed, "Jeeze, you're really something, you know that? I leave and you think I don't care anymore. Memories don't work like that."

"It's not that I thought you didn't care... I figured it would be best if you just forgot about me." Ivan said.

"If that's the case, then why are you here?" Gilbert asked.

"I-" the question threw Ivan off, but he knew exactly why he was here. "I... I guess I'm selfish, and I didn't want to let go of you." He confessed. He felt weak, but it was true. After his sisters left, all he wanted was to cuddle against Gilbert and feel loved. His sisters were all he had left of family, so feeling loved was almost automatic, but once that was gone, he had nothing left. He left home and wanted to see Gilbert and he hoped he still cared; he still wanted to see what could be, to see if he still had a chance to be happy with the albino. Even if it meant he would mess up Gilbert's life again and be rejected.

"I see..." Gilbert said, and then suddenly smiled. "No one told you that you had to let go." He said and leaned into the Russian's shoulder, closing his eyes. Ivan didn't say anything, but he lifted an arm up and wrapped it around the smaller man, pulling him a tad bit closer to him. "I missed you." Gilbert mumbled out, turning his head into the Russian's chest and nuzzling into him.

"I've missed you too, Gilbert. So very much..." Ivan said, resting his head against the top of the albino's, and sniffed a bit to take in his scent. That was the only thing different, it seemed. "You smell like fruit." Ivan said, pulling back and looking at the other with a cute smile little on his face.

"Yep~ I don't smell like pretty flowers anymore now." Gilbert replied, feeling a bit happier now that Ivan was smiling.

Ivan's smile grew a bit more and he nuzzled his face into Gilbert's hair, taking in more of the sweet scent. "With you smelling like this, it makes me just want to eat you right up." He hummed, wrapping his other arm around the albino.

The Russian's comment made Gilbert blush softly, but he smiled and leaned into the other more, holding onto the bowl in his lap a bit tighter so it wouldn't spill. "Sorry, but you can't. I'm sick remember?" Gilbert said.

Ivan pulled back and looked down at the other, and hummed curiously. "So, when you're not sick anymore, I can eat you?" he asked a bit playfully.

"Maybe, if you plan on sticking around long enough..." Gilbert said, looking a bit sadly at the other.

Ivan smiled warmly, chuckling a bit. "Well... I had planned on trying to get permanent citizenship here in Germany. That is, if you'll have me...?" He said.

Ivan noticed that as he spoke, Gilbert's eyes blinked a few times, and then he suddenly pulled back from Ivan once he was done speaking, "For real? You're serious?" he asked, his eyes wide. Ivan simply nodded, still smiling at the other. "That's... that's awesome!" He exclaimed, nearly bursting into tears of happiness. "You could live nearby, a-and I could see you all the time!" he continued on, actually happily laughing a bit, and then coughing when his throat got too dry.

Ivan frowned when Gilbert began coughing and took away the bowl, setting it on the nightstand, and then brought the glass of water over to Gilbert. "Drink this as well; Ludwig told me you haven't been drinking much either." He said.

Gilbert sighed lightly and took the glass, "What _else_ did Ludwig tell you?" he asked sarcastically as he took a drink.

"That you sometimes say my name." Ivan grinned a little, and noticed his answer made Gilbert almost choke on his water and that his cheeks turned a bit pink. "Don't worry, it was nothing bad. Unless... there is something bad that he just didn't tell me~" Ivan hummed, poking Gilbert's nose softly.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." He said, looking away and trying to hide his embarrassment by drinking the rest of the water quickly. He wasn't going to admit it to Ivan, but Gilbert has been told by Ludwig that he's "grumbled" the Russian's name in his sleep more than once in the past two months.

Ivan smiled softly at him, just happy that Gilbert seemed to get his spunk back, and even though he was sick with a fever he still seemed healthy, so Ivan was at least happy that he was okay. After a moment, Ivan took the glass from the albino and set it next to the near empty bowl. He turned to him and then leaned in, placing a soft kiss on his forehead before wrapping his arms around the smaller man and hugging him tightly. Gilbert welcomed and returned the hug, and stayed just like that for what seemed like minutes of just silent hugging.

Ivan pulled back from Gilbert after a moment and looking into his eyes. He even moved his body back a little and looked up and down the albino's bare torso, and suddenly had an overwhelming need to touch him. "Can I just admire you for a minute?" he asked, and Gilbert nodded after a moment. Ivan smiled softly and let his fingers trace over the curves of Gilbert's shoulders, then letting them ghost down his chest a bit. He stopped at the scar and traced it with the index finger of his right hand while the other hand went back up and wrapped its fingers gently around Gilbert's shoulder again.

"It's completely healed." Ivan said, smiling as he outlined the sensitive skin, and then leaned down to give the mark a sweet kiss.

"Yeah, it is." Gilbert smiled softly, and then blushed lightly when Ivan's head went down. The Russian continued to place long and loving kisses along the scar, moving his right hand out of the way and wrapping his fingers firmly around the albino's body under his arm, his left hand sliding from the boney shoulder down to Gilbert's skinny waist and let his fingers touch against his hips.

Gilbert let out contented sighs the entire time, leaning back a bit as his face flushed up lightly. He truly loved the treatment that the Russian was giving him. He didn't realize how much he had missed this man's touch; his embrace, his kiss, his scent, and even that little tickle that his breath caused on Gilbert's skin. It was all good. Maybe too good to be true.

"Pinch me." Gilbert said suddenly, looking down at the Russian male, who then looked up upon hearing the request.

"Excuse me?" he said, a bit confused by what Gilbert was asking for.

"Pinch me so I know this is real." He answered, now looking off to the side, his cheeks a faint pink.

Ivan said nothing more and did as requested. However, he grinned a little as his eyes shifted to the side, and he decided to pinch at one of Gilbert's pinkish nipples instead of anywhere else, rather hard as well. The action made Gilbert hiss and then growl a bit; irritated but slightly aroused by Ivan's action. He looked down at the pleased and proud looking Russian and gave him a joking glare. "This is real alright." He said and sighed, waiting for Ivan to remove his two fingers that were still gently squeezing his nipple.

Ivan smiled and didn't move his hand, rather, he just let his palm touch and move that part of Gilbert's body in a bit of a sensual way.

Gilbert then gripped the Russian's hand, "Ivan, stop... I can't do anything because I'm sick. Plus Ludwig is right outside..." he mumbled quietly.

"I never said I was going to make you do anything. I just want to admire your body..." He replied and leaned in to kiss down on the German's collarbone, earning a sharp intake of air from him.

"I-I know, but, if you keep kissing and rubbing me like that, I'm going to have a problem..." Gilbert said, shifting his eyes away from Ivan.

The Russian looked up at the albino, "A problem?" he asked, innocence shining in his violet irises, knowing full well what the man meant.

Gilbert's face heated up more and it actually made him feel a bit faint. "Yes, a problem, now stop. You can touch me somewhere else." He said as he pulled Ivan's hand away from his semi-erect nipple.

Ivan simply smiled and took control of his hand again and moved it to Gilbert's jaw and cupped it, leaning up toward him. "Can I kiss you?" he asked. Though he was going to do it regardless of Gilbert's answer, he guessed it would be nice to let the albino reply.

Gilbert nodded slowly, even though it was probably not a good idea to kiss him since he was sick, but he kind of figured that Ivan was going to anyway.

Ivan kissed him. Being extremely gentle as if savoring the kiss entirely. He had waited for this moment for 2 months and had imagined it perfectly several times in his head during many sleepless nights tossing and turning in a drunken haze. However, now that he was here and actually doing it, his 'perfect image' faded away instantly, because no mental image could even _begin_ to compare to the real thing. Even though they were dry and chapped, Ivan adored how Gilbert's lips seemed to just melt against his, mirroring his own movements a little but letting the Russian dominate the kiss completely. Gilbert's lips made subtle movements against Ivan's as a way of almost urging the Russian to continue, and Ivan loved how Gilbert brought his arms up slowly as the kiss continued, wrapping them around his neck and forcing his body closer to the larger man. He truly missed Gilbert, and his cute little ways of giving into Ivan.

Ivan pulled back from the kiss after a moment to let the other breathe and before he took the kiss any further. "I have something for you." He said as he smiled at the other, and began fishing through one of the front pockets of his pants as Gilbert sat there looking curiously at him. Ivan gripped what was in his pocket and maneuvered it into the palm of his hand and pulled it out. "I had this made for you before you left, but I never gave it to you because I was scared, and then you were called home, so..." he said, and held Gilbert's hand in his free one, and placed his hand over it, and let the object fall soundly onto the German's palm.

It was warm from being in Ivan's pocket but felt hard and a little light. Gilbert looked down at his palm as Ivan moved his own hand off of his and his eyes widened a bit when the item was revealed, "A ring...?" he asked and then looked up at Ivan.

"Yes. I had it made especially for you, and it was supposed to be your birthday gift, but..." Ivan said, looking away sadly in remembrance of that night.

Gilbert gripped the silver ring tightly and suddenly threw his arms back around Ivan. "I love it..." He mumbled softly, nuzzling his face into the Russian's neck a bit.

Ivan smiled happily at the albino's gesture and words and wrapped his arms around the German's waist. "I'm glad you like it." He said, and then Gilbert pulled back, sitting in front of the other and looking at the ring admiringly. Ivan took the ring back from the other and pointed to the inside. "See this? It says 'I love you' in Russian." He said, smiling lovingly at the other male.

"Made especially for me, huh?" Gilbert chuckled, looking at the nice engraving and even blushing lightly.

Ivan nodded in response. "Let's try it on." he said, smiling softly as he carefully slid the small loop around the ring finger of the albino's left hand. It slid down to the base where his finger connected with his palm and fit perfectly; not too tight or too loose. Gilbert smiled at it lovingly, liking how well it fit around his finger.

"A perfect fit." Ivan said, not able to stop smiling at the other. The ring really did look beautiful on the German, and he was very glad that Gilbert liked his gift.

Gilbert nodded and brought his hand closer to his face to get a better look at it. "It must have cost you a lot." He said and looked back up at the other, looking a tad bit guilty but still happy regardless.

"Yeah well, I don't spend money often, and it was worth it to see you smile." Ivan said, and nuzzled against Gilbert, giving him a little Eskimo kiss. "You should get some rest; I don't want you to get even sicker." The Russian said, and pulled back from the other and stood up at the side of the bed.

Gilbert pouted as Ivan moved back, but he sighed. "We should talk to Ludwig; see if we can set you up here with us until you get citizenship and find a place to stay." He said, moving his blanket off of his legs and stood up next to the Russian, "Plus, I'd like to tell him about us." Gilbert smiled.

Ivan thought for a moment and then nodded in agreement. "Alright, but afterward I want you to get as much rest as you need." He said, "Also, you should put more clothing on if we're going to talk to him..." Ivan mumbled out a little.

"Come on, Ludwig's my brother. He's seen me in my underwear before, so it won't be a problem." Gilbert said, missing the point.

Ivan chuckled softly and gently ruffled Gilbert's snow-white hair, bringing his face down to the albino's, "That's not what I meant, Rabbit..." He said, grinning a bit teasingly at him.

Somehow, Gilbert realized what the other meant by the look in his eyes and his grin. His face turned a light pink and he looked down. "Yeah, okay good idea. He said and quickly scuttled away from the Russian and over to his wardrobe. Ivan smiled, watching the half-naked man hurry away, smirking a little at the sight. Gilbert eventually pulled out some black sweats and a baggy gray t-shirt and slipped them on lazily. He took his spot by Ivan's side again and looked up at him, smiling happily, but still looking pretty tired.

Ivan returned the smile and leaned down a bit to give Gilbert a soft kiss on his lips. "If I get sick because of you, I expect you'll take care of me." He said, chuckling softly as he nuzzled against his love.

Gilbert smiled childishly, "Sure thing~" Gilbert hummed and cuddled back a little. "Oh..." he mumbled and then gently took Ivan's hand into his. "We'll go together, okay?" he asked, looking up at the Russian, who was giving him a look full of love and endearment.

"Yes. Together." He said, and began leading the smaller man toward the bedroom door; walking out into the hall hand-in-hand with the love of his life.

.

_During those two months that you were gone, I felt like my life had ended but I was being forced to continue on; being constantly haunted by the thought that maybe I should have fought for you and kept you as my own. Yet I never lost hope of seeing your smiling face, hearing your joyful laugh, touching your smooth skin, and kissing your soft lips again. It was the only thing that made breathing tolerable. I never stopped thinking about you, and I continued to dream of the day that I would see you again, hold you tight in my arms, and whisper softly into your ear..._

_"I love you, Gilbert." As the rest of the world faded around us._

.

**_~Fin~_**

* * *

Well, that's it. That's the end of this story. I can't believe I _actually_ finished it.

Okay first off, this is the first multi-chapter fanfiction I have _ever_ written through to the end, and I honestly have you readers to thank for that. Thank you so much for your reviews, follows, favorites, and even adding me to your favorite authors list. In the month of February 2013, I updated this fanfiction 4 times, including this chapter, and I never would have been able to do so if you guys didn't keep reviewing and encouraging me to write this.  
I hope the ending was decent enough. It was happy so some of you should be pleased at least. Sorry there's not much else that happened between Ivan and Gilbert romantically, but I'm satisfied with it.  
Anyway, thanks again for reading through 'Broken Rabbit', and I hope you enjoyed it.

_-GillyRabbit_


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